How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Posts Tagged ‘should’

Over the past 9 years me and my wife have been together. we have both cheated and have gotten past doing it but the jealousy is still thier from time to time and when it is thier we fight like cats and dogs. i have had a problem with both using and selling drugs. she has told me time and time again that if i don’t stop its over . Well i didnt stop and she finally sdaid she wants a divorce. i am humble enough to admit that i messed up big time. she has given me so many chances to grow up we are 29and 28. so you know we both work regluar jobs and both make good money. we both take care of are son and make sure we do alot with him ( like vac, baseball football, everything. but with the drinking and doping i would also break promises. Well she left and said it was over. We had a marriage couns session set up but never made it do to a last week fight when she stayed out with a old friend till 4am in the morning then lied about where she was and admitted to lying. its been to weeks now and last night i forgot my sons book bag in her car when i went to her dads to get it she was not home. when i called her and she came home she admitted to staying the night at that same guys house but said they went tom a movie and then went back to his house and she just fell asleep. she said she just needed a friend. would you call this a date or just someone needing a friend? She also said she will not go to counsling.

I have done research on why I move so much in my sleep and I think I may have found a reason. My sleep paralysis is shut off. This means that my brain isn’t sending my body signals to stop my muscles from moving. My marriage is in jepordy because of this and I have tried so much. One drug that could help is iron pills before bed, those don’t seem to be working. I have heard of other drugs, but I cannot find them in any local store. I don’t want to have to keep on sleeping on the floor or on the sofa. I want to sleep in the same bed as my wife without hurting her and leaving marks on her. She has also had three back operations and I always seem to hit her there too. I don’t want to be the reason my wife ends up in a wheelchair. If anybody out there can help me, I would be forever grateful.

I just found out that my boyfriend of almost two years has been cheating on me with his ex lover. I found out by accident when his yahoo messenger popped up on our computer. I am baffled. I have done nothing but love this man and he is the love of my life. We have both been married before and technically he still is which is why we’re not (his ex wont sign papers) We have a brand new baby boy together and I found out he was trying to hook up with her just days after he was born and while I was pregnant. There is no emotional connection between the two just a sexual one. To make matters worse she is 52! I am 29 and he is almost 28. Can you imagine how I feel?! I read all of their emails and the words just keep playing over and over in my head. I am afraid that it will never go away and how can I trust him not to do it again. He says that he’s been trying to tell me for a long time and nothing has happened in a few months which has been verified by email dates. He says he doesn’t know why he did it that I’ve done nothing wrong and I couldn’t have done anything differently. He was cheated on by his ex wife a couple of times and he is forever hurt by this. After they seperated he went on one of those wild binges with girls and then we met. We both have children from our previous marriages and he went from being a wild man to being settled down with three kids and one on the way. Quite a change but still no reason to cheat in my eyes. But, I love him soooo much. He makes me feel like Ive never been in love before him. I don’t know how I would survive happily without him. I would cry more than I do now thinking about him cheating. What should I do? How can I get on with it (its only been two days)? What guidelines should I set so he doesnt think he’s getting away with something? Please help me….I’m desperate and I can’t tell my family because I don’t want them to hate him.

Chapter One
1968,Tommaso Buscetta stood in the court room with a sincere yet respectful grin on his face, as he was being burdened with queries about the Tom Hewitt murder case. Tommaso Buscetta was an average height man but a very stocky build. He had dusky olive coloured skin which was well suited to his greasy Black hair which strode finely down his polo shirt collars. Buscetta was wearing a navy Blue pinstripe suit made out of wool, with a golden chain hanging down his torso with a locket attached to it. The gold-silver plated contained a picture of his wife and youngest son who he loved dearly.
Tom Hewitt a New York prime newspaper publisher was murdered December 1962 just after peace had been made after the first mafia war-Which had been caused by the tension due to the missing Heroin shipment which was coming into America. The heroin was to be shared out between the families who had contributed their assets into a 3.5 million dollar drug deal with some Columbians producing and distributing narcotics in the Caribbean. The mafia families didn’t take kindly to their assets been lost and floating around in the Pacific Ocean. Most of the families who had been involved in the Heroin deal were either part of the Irish mob that had come to America to ensure they had retained profit from this deal for future events that their family would go through or the families were part of the notorious Cosa Nostra. Overall there were seven families involved in this deal and they had all lost their money because of some disturbance which had occurred on the Caribbean borders.
The war broke out in New York in 1961, it was the first ever mafia war to occur in America since the olive oil war( massacre of Caruli family in Brooklyn Olive factory)-rumoured to of happened because they had not paid payments they owed to the Bastani loan sharks which protected the Caruli empire for years.

I just found out that my boyfriend of almost two years has been cheating on me with an old lover from a few years ago. I found out by accident when his yahoo messenger popped up on our computer. I am baffled. I have done nothing but love this man and he is the love of my life. We have both been married before and technically he still is which is why we’re not (his ex of five years wont sign papers) We have a brand new baby boy together and I found out he was trying to hook up with her just days after he was born and while I was pregnant. There is no emotional connection between the two just a sexual one. To make matters worse she is 52! I am 29 and he is almost 28. Can you imagine how I feel?! I read all of their emails and the words just keep playing over and over in my head. I am afraid that it will never go away and how can I trust him not to do it again. He says that he’s been trying to tell me for a long time and nothing has happened in a few months which has been verified by email dates. He says he doesn’t know why he did it that I’ve done nothing wrong and I couldn’t have done anything differently. He was cheated on by his ex wife a couple of times and he is forever hurt by this. After they seperated he went on one of those wild binges with girls and then we met. We both have children from our previous marriages and he went from being a wild man to being settled down with three kids and one on the way. Quite a change but still no reason to cheat in my eyes. But, I love him soooo much. He makes me feel like Ive never been in love before him. I don’t know how I would survive happily without him. I would cry more than I do now thinking about him cheating. What should I do? How can I get on with it (its only been two days)? What guidelines should I set so he doesnt think he’s getting away with something? Please help me….I’m desperate and I can’t tell my family because I don’t want them to hate him.

A very nice meek depressed man left his not so nice wife after 15 years of marriage. He married her because he wanted to give her a better life because her “trailer white trash roots”. She lived with poor me syndrome, binges without health concerns, double-standards, no friends, no families, no hobbies who desperately became pregnant (without his knowledge) fear of being on her own. A child didn’t save their marriage. He feels guilty for leaving and promises her that no matter what she is member of the family, she is never pushed out in the cold. A year later he met a new woman, he hopes the new girl will accept his prior arrangement with the old girl still hangs around but in reality the new girl is not accepting. He has a hard times reversing his promises to his old girl because he feels sorry for her. He says the new girl is his love and priority but he feels bad pushing the old girl out.

What would you do if you were in my situation of a new girl? Help! I love him but…

I met my wife in 2006 summer. She asked me for my number. She called me for 3 weeks before I returned her call because I thought she was not serious (she is now 25 and I am now 39). We had sex the first night we spent together. She then started telling me how she felt that I was the best man she had ever met(even though she has 4 kids from her 1st marriage). I told her since she was married I cuoldnt have a relationship with her, so 2 months later she filed for divocre. She showed me the papers to prove to me that she was serious and i made me feel good at the time so i gave her a chance. The first 5 months went smoothly then, she started becoming dominant, bossy, controlling, verbally abusive,etc..when I paid all the bills took her and her 4 kids in, work 13 hour shift in the emergency room, come home to her every night etc… Then we married 1-11-2008. 1 month later she cheated on me with 2 men at different times. She spend all her money on clothes etc before she pays her bills. She gets little sleep, parties all night, hangs with her girlfiends who are not doing anything productive with themselves, etc. We have changed residences 4 times because she was bored staying there. I finally bought a 5 bedroom ranch home in a very good area. 3 months later she pawned her 2500$ wedding ring for a 150$ to put a deposit down on a apt in a run-down neighborhood(drugs crimes etc). She got back on the telephone chat line meeting men. She met one guy the next day she had sex with him by the way, she has cheated on me 8 time during our marriage. Now i need advice on if i should stand by my wife because of her disorder or get away and why/how without losing my sanity? She is very manipulative(says one thing does another). Very sexy and she uses her sex appeal to get men intrested in her until she feels that she s got them. I had several confrontations with various men concerning her, they feel like she is playing them too but im married to her. How do i get my self esteem up to face being away from her. Is she ill or playing games?
She was perscibed Haldol Lexipro Seroquel and Depakote 2 years ago but refuses to take them or seek treatment. I think that she is getting worse as far as her impulsiveness. She can barely take care of her bills so she talks to men on the chat-line to get money (looking for the bigger,better,deal) but there is not many men who would take in her and 4 kids just for sex(thats all she is bringing to the table). Thats why she keeps on rotating men in her life(i feel sorry and ashamed for her). She says that she wants to better herself but she never follows through. Its her habitual-ritual you cant belive anything she says.
How do I stop worrying about her? Its tearing me up on the inside. I feel like im in the MATRIX!!!(THERE IS NO SPOON…)I fell in love with a hoodrat but I know that there is good in her. She has been through alot and she seems to be scarred. But it seems to me that she blames others and myself for her shortcommings. I feel that one of the men she is involved with will physically hurt her and i wont be there to protect her.

I have been married for 7 years and now have 3 kids, 7, 4, 2. We got married when I got pregnant with our first baby. I didnt know he had an oxy problem until after the baby was born. I was so confused and we battled with it for the past 6 years. I would kick him out when he was abusing it because it truly made me feel like he was a zombie, he was there physically but not mentally. I had a final ultimatum, either he quits or I leave! In January he went through detox and has been clean from oxy to the best of my knowledge ever since. We have insane trust issues because he ALWAYS lies even up until I pull the proof I have out right in front of his face and he sometimes still tries to deny it! Currently my issues are not oxy with him, he started just smoking (which is still grose), and then graduated to smoking spice and then finally to full blown pot! I also catch him with porn, its so degrading and makes me feel like a worthless wife! I mean I have done EVERYTHING to try to make myself his porn, boob job, I am very fit and I take care of the way I look. Its not enough because he is still looking at it. I am desperate, it’s just killing me! My fear is that the porn or pot could progress into something more serious too like a cocaine habit or an affair! I am LDS and I believe that I should stay but I don’t want to enable him either. I am supposed to talk to him about it tonight and have considered a separation or a schedule where he would have to prove his progress or else if he doesn’t get help I will leave! I am so confused and scared! I want him I love him but is there some way I can stay and still be helping him to stop this addictive cycle? (Please don’t make rude comments towards my religion)

Sorry So Long But Please Read!

I am 21 years old I have a almost 2 year old son. My son’s father is a police officer he is 39 years old now. When I met him I was only 18 I was young dumb and made some bad choices. I ended up getting pregnant at 18 I had my son when I was 19. It was all fun for my son’s father to have a “young pretty thing” until I got pregnant then he was no where to be found. He refused to support me threw my pregnancy and decided to go with denying my son was his. When my son was born he didn’t come to the hospital because his ex wife’s friend works there and he didn’t tell his teenage daughters ex wife or any other family and friends about my son. I paid for a DNA test because he wouldn’t and when my son was 2 weeks old it came back of course he was the father. He still didn’t tell anyone about my son till he was a month old. And now that my son is almost 2 I am still involved with a child support battle with him and I just recieved my first payment a few weeks ago. He only see’s my son once every week or two for a few hours each time. He says horrible things about me to his daughters mostly all lies. He has told them he was intoxicated and I took advantage of him (yeah with my 18 year old little self). I do have a good relationship with his ex wife though so alot of the lies he tells them can be straightened out.
So to my dilema there is a bar around the corner from my home. My significant other and I have a date night ever 3 weeks or so and usually stop in there before heading home to see some friends. To my surprise the other night my son’s father walked in the bar. I have a RO on him so he can’t speak to me but he kept his distance just talking to the bartender. I found out they are in the beginning stages of dating she is young to I would say no older then 23. I was in there last night and she looked at me like I was the devil. Should I say something to her about how he is? I wish someone would have told me before I got myself wrapped up in the hell that is him. Or let her figure it out on her own?

http://answers.yahoo.com/my/my;_ylt=Ah4_WwatoWhr.zBGABYSddidn’tIX;_ylv=3

So i called the police after I had posted this I still didn’t know what to do at the time… I called my mom to pick up my son I didnt want him to be there going thru this watching etc…So Two officers came down and so I spoke to them, The wife is still asleep doesnt have a clue wats going on… The officers clearly break it down and tell me what is it that you want us to do… and well with what they said I really could not afford her going in cuz then I would stack bills on my shoulder that I really dont need… So they told to really speak to her and take her to rehab and get her a detox and all that stuff… and try to save my family instead of having to go to court spending a **** load of money and having to testify against my wife and taking full custody of my son… I know it really sucks for me right now cuz I dont have that kind of money to pay for an attorney and so forth… I really love my family and idk what to do??? some couples are lucky and dont have to go thru this…

k so after the cops left I felt a little better no they didnt take her cuz I said no and yes I apologized for their waste of time and they it was fine as long as they helped me… When she wakes up finally I told her whats up with you? she goes nothing? so it took about 3 questions until she said yes I did do it last night(tweek)well ne way I told her I wasnt going to put up with it and i was taking my son with my so she cried and begged me for hours.. for me not to leave, she promised apologized she swore and put it on my son that she would not ever come in contact with it again but she didnt regret doing it cuz that didnt come out of her mouth.. but basically everything else.. I told her you know what you should of thought of this before you did it you are an adult a mom and a wife you should act like one im a man and i know wat is expected from me and dont need to be doing stupid **** and lose my family… So she cried and begged some more and swore and all that stuff.. & guess wat?
Im still here… I feel like im taking care of another child, Always watching her, Always around etc…
Why??? I love my family.. But why does somebody (partner) have to kill it for the husband(in my case) and son??? I dont understand???

Should I stay with my wife and kids in the cold Midwest or go by myself to Florida?
My wife and I have been married for a three years. We have been together for six years. She has two young children from a previous marriage. Ages 7 and 12. The kids get on my nerves a lot, but I do love them. My wife and I have had a lot of issues over the past year. The problems caused by me and include: talking with other women online behind her back which include a woman who my wife had a threesome with at a party and emailing an ex-fiancee, smoking marijuana, and talking about moving to Florida even after she had told me she would never leave our home because her family lives here.

I believe my desire to move to Florida is the biggest issue currently. Right now I own a home in the Midwest (mortgage is under my name only) where we get 70+ inches of snow every year. I have recently been offered a job in Tampa which is where I have always wanted to live. The job pays 9K more than I make right now. I do like my present job (in the same field) but the job in Florida appears to offer more challenging work which would boost my career. I have been vacationing in Florida for years and I have a brother who lives there. When I was drunk recently I told my wife that I was moving to Tampa and I wanted her and the kids to come too. She got very angry and told me to go. She said she wasn’t moving because her family is here and she doesn’t want to leave them. That is the first big issue that has occured recently. The second thing I did to hurt our marriage further was to begin smoking a “legal” pot that is sold at head shops. I smoked some last week and became so high I couldn’t even stand up. My wife knew something was wrong with me so I told her what I did. She then kicked me out of the house. After a week of living apart she has agreed to give me one last chance. We have been going to marriage counseling together (twice) and I have been attending NA meetings.

My question is this. Should I stay here in the Midwest and try to make my marriage work or should I move to Tampa? The marriage counseling seems to be helping me more than my wife. She feels that the counselor is on my side and making excuses for my bad behaviors. She has said that I should go by myself and there is no reason for her to go there. She did however say that she will continue going. She also says that I open up to the counselor and people at NA meetings, but I don’t talk to her. Lately I have been trying to be more open and honest with her. The problem is though that the more I tell her the more mad she gets and the less she trusts me when I tell her about things I have done in the past. For the past week I have been a good guy with no drugs, lying etc. As I said I am trying now, but it may be too late.

I have reservations about leaving. They include: losing a wife I love, losing the only kids I have ever known as my own, having to most likely foreclose on my house, possibly taking a job that appears better but in reality is not. My desire to leave comes from the beliefs that: my marriage may be too far eroded to save, I hate the gloomy Winters here, more opportunity in the new job. Please provide any advice that may be helpful. Thanks.

Thank you for taking the time to read my question. My wife and I have been married for 3 years, been together for 7 years. We have 3 small boys ages 1,3 and 5. I have been in jail (3 times) due to my wife calling on Domestic Violence, every time she was either pregnant in the last trimester, or after the birth of one of our boys, all cases were dismissed with prejudice against her. I never hurt or harmed her, she just went crazy. Twice she was intoxicated on wine, but the police took me away, because I am the man and she was pregnant.
In 2005 we started a small seafood business, she quit her job which had great Benefits (Starbucks) I asked her not too because of the burden of health insurance on a small business, we did great to start, but she insisted on overpaying us out of the company, also she wanted to buy a house so we also purchased a home 2 months into our new business. I was trying to make her happy. Since then our relationship went downhill, this is where I started feeling hopeless with our relationship, although I went through the court system and jail, I forgave and told myself to hold the family together.
In summer 2007 the money in company ran out and she told me that she wanted to separate, she took the kids and moved to her mothers home, I ended up having to file a chapter 7 personally, due to no money and Credit Card debt above 25000 dollars, I also have decided to surrender my home, because I can’t make the mortgage.

Currently, she is going to counseling for herself, I feel alienated because when I ask about ‘us’ the family and she and I, she says that she does not know. She moved out at the end of August, and she has not done anything for the sake of the family, but only for herself, I have talked to my parents about it and they want me to divorce her, they believe that sometime along the way of our lives, she decided that she just wanted a meal ticket, they want me to find someone that will work with me and love me.
Another important point I want to make is that my parents invested 20K, and her grandfather invested 50k into the company, this is how she and we maintained the lifestyle that is now falling apart. In the bankruptcy I listed my parents and her grandfather for protection. Recently she told me that we need to pay her grandfather back, but no mention of paying my parents, I wrote a letter to her grandparents wanting to know what the situation was with the loan they gave my wife, but they have not answered back. My wife wants me to pay her 500 per month for the next 6 years to pay back this loan, I don’t believe her, especially now without an answer to my letter sent to her grandparents. I feel that she is holding the relationship hostage to get her way.

Should I move on, I am only 37, I think that she has some mental and emotional issues, that only she can work on, I also feel used, I mean she left me right when all the money ran out, and left me to fix it.

I have written letters to her letting her know that I love her with no response.

My friends say that she has turned into a gold digger.

I need some arbitrary advice on this…

Who are any of you to tell anyone else what they can take in relation to recreational drugs, after all I was led to believe that this is my life, my body and up to me what I choose to do with such. I am pretty sure I do not need to consult any of you should I choose to throw myself from a tall building resulting in death, therefore why should some of you feel the need to restrict my choices when it comes to drugs. What does it matter to any of you if I choose to take some heroin on a Friday night and have sex with my wife all night, what harm to any of you does that cause, and more important what business of yours is it anyway. Perhaps those of you who think for some reason that I should not be allowed to take heroin might think about that when your down the pub doing drugs with your local dealers (Alcohol is a drug, just in case you have not figured that one out),
I would like to say that I would like to see the control freaks removed from the gene pool, this is just about my rights to take drugs, nothing else just drugs, please try to answer the question asked…

My wife and I have been married for a three years. We have been together for six years. She has two young children from a previous marriage. Ages 7 and 12. The kids get on my nerves a lot, but I do love them. My wife and I have had a lot of issues over the past year. The problems caused by me and include: talking with other women online behind her back which include a woman who my wife had a threesome with at a party and emailing an ex-fiancee, smoking marijuana, and talking about moving to Florida even after she had told me she would never leave our home because her family lives here.

I believe my desire to move to Florida is the biggest issue currently. Right now I own a home in the Midwest (mortgage is under my name only) where we get 70+ inches of snow every year. I have recently been offered a job in Tampa which is where I have always wanted to live. The job pays 9K more than I make right now. I do like my present job (in the same field) but the job in Florida appears to offer more challenging work which would boost my career. I have been vacationing in Florida for years and I have a brother who lives there. When I was drunk recently I told my wife that I was moving to Tampa and I wanted her and the kids to come too. She got very angry and told me to go. She said she wasn’t moving because her family is here and she doesn’t want to leave them. That is the first big issue that has occured recently. The second thing I did to hurt our marriage further was to begin smoking a “legal” pot that is sold at head shops. I smoked some last week and became so high I couldn’t even stand up. My wife knew something was wrong with me so I told her what I did. She then kicked me out of the house. After a week of living apart she has agreed to give me one last chance. We have been going to marriage counseling together (twice) and I have been attending NA meetings.

My question is this. Should I stay here in the Midwest and try to make my marriage work or should I move to Tampa? The marriage counseling seems to be helping me more than my wife. She feels that the counselor is on my side and making excuses for my bad behaviors. She has said that I should go by myself and there is no reason for her to go there. She did however say that she will continue going. She also says that I open up to the counselor and people at NA meetings, but I don’t talk to her. Lately I have been trying to be more open and honest with her. The problem is though that the more I tell her the more mad she gets and the less she trusts me when I tell her about things I have done in the past. For the past week I have been a good guy with no drugs, lying etc. As I said I am trying now, but it may be too late.

I have reservations about leaving. They include: losing a wife I love, losing the only kids I have ever known as my own, having to most likely foreclose on my house, possibly taking a job that appears better but in reality is not. My desire to leave comes from the beliefs that: my marriage may be too far eroded to save, I hate the gloomy Winters here, more opportunity in the new job. Please provide any advice that may be helpful. Thanks.

I have always been in long relationships. there are three people who i can say i truly love.yet i feel like they have all kept me on the side for the just in case moments. i met my best friend when my dad passed in 1990. i met my other friend who is now married and tried to hide it from me in the 7th grade and i met my kids father in job corp. i was 20 and he was 19. my issue is why am i holding on to these people when i really believe they don’t care about how i feel because if they did well i would know. as it stands my kids father has a girl friend yet at one time he claimed to still and always love me. now he disrespects me and i can’t stand talking to him at all. my best friend got married and now her ex wife is with someone else yet she still deals with a a lot of other girls who really she doesn’t care for. i spent the night with her last night because she went on a drinking binge and had a really bad hang over and didn’t have any money to get home. all three of them i love deeply yet i feel like i have to let them go because they are using me to keep me around because they are who they ,my friend my best friend and my kids father. i am confused and i don’t know. should i keep them in my life or should i move on and leave them alone.

My wife has been going out drinking on the weekends. I myself am not a big drinker and right now am having kidney problems so I have not been drinking at all. Just last weekend she went out with a “girlfriend” whom I’ve known for years also. I got a phone call at 1am from her “girlfriend” asking if my wife was home yet because she had left my wife an hour before at a bar and now my wife wasn’t there. I told her to check another bar my wife likes to drink at and sure enough there she was.

Now when my wife got home she was so drunk she could not walk on her own, was puking, and even urinated in her pants. The next morning I asked her about her night and she said, “ugghh yeah I had too much to drink.” So I asked about her disappearing act and pants wetting and she said, “I THOUGHT I was at the same bar all night, and I don’t know if I wet my pants.”

I told her once before when she was so drunk she couldn’t stand and was puking that she was acting foolish and what she was doing was dangerous. She assured me she wouldn’t get to that point again. It seems she went well beyond that point this time. Besides alcohol poisoning, she could hurt herself, or someone could rape her while she is this intoxicated.

What should I do/tell her? I don’t want this to ruin our marriage but we have 2 young sons to take care of also.

To lay it out I am 4 months pregnant and since we found out I have not had a single drink. Prior to being pregnant I would driink with him. Still give him a hard time about it but controdicted myself at the same time. I knew I was starting to have a problem and it scared me. Like I mentioned before as soon as I found out that is what saved me so to speak. My problem is this my fiance wants to quit he talks about it frequently and he whole heartedly want so stop but he isn’t. His twin brother is the same way and in the same situation. (His wife is also expecting) Whenever they are around each other my fiance drinks. Is it because of routine? But further more he has many alcoholics that are friends and family that binge drink as well and this is what they do. Partially its a cultural thing. I understand a few drinks but I dont understand why must he get to the point where he is always the drunkest one there and passes out. It is embarrassing to me before I feel like I must take responsibility for his actions because he wont. He wont do AA and he is in anger management court ordered because he distroyed the inside of my vehicle when we got into an arguement after a night of drinking and I was wanting to go our seperate ways. I am not sure what I can actually do. I don’t buy the alcohol for him any more if he drinks I dont let him sleep in the bedroom and if he goes to his mothers house (To drink) I wont pick him up or speak with him. I am really lost. I love him very much I see how much he wants to stop but I think his surroundings and the addiction have and will always win.
I understand everyones initial response to leave. Thats easy. I know what alcohol does to people and families and yet I have personally seen full blown abusive alcoholics turn to a sober healthly life. The other reason I dont want leaving him to be the only option is because having loved ones leave him.abandon him has partially caused some of the need to drink. “Suppress all problems with a drink.”

Five years ago my sisters daughter(niece) who was an active heroin junkie took severe advantage of my wife. My wife was and is innocent of junkies. My sister defended her daughter by truly badmouthing my wife to the rest of my family. I said nothing, not my style when I know what is right. NOW— Five years after the fact I won very large in the lottery. VERY LARGE . I now see that this sister I have not spoken to in five years is my best pal. Any suggestions? I won’t say harsh things(though I feel them) . This sister has hurt relations with most of my brothers and sisters. I am a quiet guy who holds a lifetime grudge.

We have been married for 9 years (together for 13). We have one child together and she has two from a previous marriage (13 and 17). Recently (over the past year) she has refused to talk to me regarding the problems with her kids. The older one was pregnant and miscarried, smoked, did drugs and drank. The younger one is drinking and doing drugs. I have asked my wife to look into to this and do something about it. I am not allowed to discuss this with her kids and when I try to talk to her about it, she tells me ‘I don’t want to talk about it’. I am frustrated and I don’t want my child growing up around this kind of environment. HELP!