How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Posts Tagged ‘problem’

I have done research on why I move so much in my sleep and I think I may have found a reason. My sleep paralysis is shut off. This means that my brain isn’t sending my body signals to stop my muscles from moving. My marriage is in jepordy because of this and I have tried so much. One drug that could help is iron pills before bed, those don’t seem to be working. I have heard of other drugs, but I cannot find them in any local store. I don’t want to have to keep on sleeping on the floor or on the sofa. I want to sleep in the same bed as my wife without hurting her and leaving marks on her. She has also had three back operations and I always seem to hit her there too. I don’t want to be the reason my wife ends up in a wheelchair. If anybody out there can help me, I would be forever grateful.

My wife and I have been married for almost 5 years and she’s not been pregnant during our marriage. She has a daughter from a previous marriage and the military gave her a depo shot and she’s not been pregant since. We’re considering fertility drugs and surgery and all that but for now we’re going to keep it simple. We’re trying a fertility cycle where we have sex when she’s ovulating etc. One problem we may have in trying to get her pregnant is that after I release inside her, the sperm leaks out of her vagina. Is this normal? If it isn’t, does this mean she can’t get pregant? If not, is there a way she can keep the sperm in?

So, my boyfriend and I love each other (at least he says so). However, his dreams lately seem to differ from mine. He wants to move to Colorado as soon as he can, and I’m not sure if I want to live there. I prefer lush green climates, and if I could move, I would pick Hawaii. Also, I was a military brat, and became really close to my family, because that is all you have when you move to a new place. As such, I want my future kids to be able to know my parents, and have my parents help me and stuff. My boyfriend has always lived here, and just wants to get away from his family.

Another problem is that I want to be married by the time I’m 25, and I want to be engaged now (I’m almost 24). I love him, and know that I want to be with him, but he says he is so unsure of his future, he wants to have everything in his life settled before he even thinks of getting married, which probably won’t be until 28 or 29. The problem I see is that we are the same age, and I want to have kids by 29, and we both want to enjoy married life for a while before I have kids, and if we go with his plan, what if I’m too old to have kids then?

I guess one reason why I would want to get married younger is that I’m a virgin, and he’s not, and I will not live with a boyfriend before I’m married. He says that he would really want to live with someone before he got married to them.

So, the problems are
1. The age at which we would get married
2. He wants to live together before marriage
3. Where we would live

As of yesterday, I am the only one of my friends that is not married or engaged. I feel sad, because I want to start my life with my husband, but he doesn’t want to, I guess. Any problems he has with money will be moot, because I graduate in a month, and have a job lined up where I will be making plenty of money.

I guess I need advice on whether I should just break up with him, and try to find somebody new, which hurts me to think about. Or stay with him, and see if he will propose. I have considered moving to colorado with him, but only as a husband and wife, and he doesn’t seem to want that….I need any and all advice.

Please help, thanks

Imagine a man (43 years old) who moved from the TN country setting to urban Baltimore 3 years ago. After about a year, his attitudes and behaviors started to change. He started compulsively lying. All the time. This person lies about even the small things. He’s not even good at it; he has a huge “tell”. He tells people what they want to hear and spreads rumors about his family. For months, he told his wife’s friends that she is bipolar and violent. He tried to convince her she was crazy. While he was off dicking around with his girlfriend, whenever his wife got suspicious, he convinced her that she was paranoid. He even took her to see a psychiatrist on several occasions.

This man bought a new car and said his rich, dying uncle bought it for him. He made up an elaborate story with great details. He bought a brand new Harley Road King and said a friend bought it for him. He made sure to play the scene so that none of his close family could question the friend. While his wife was working two jobs to help their son pay for college tuition, he was stealing $400/month out of his son’s bank account and using it to spend time with his mistress. Son caught on and is now pressing charges, $1,200 later.

He files for a fraudulent divorce through Mexico, which would take 2 weeks instead of his home state’s 2 year waiting period. He moves out one day while his wife is on a weekend long church retreat. He leaves her with nothing.

All during their legal divorce process, he calls her almost every day and every night and often cries, telling her they can salvage their marriage. He then goes off and has sex with his girlfriend. He lies to everyone in his family. He has lost all his friends. He has mysteriously come up with the $45,000 to buy a new Cadillac and a new motorcycle in the past year. He only works 30 hours a week.

I am not his wife, just a concerned relative. Do you think he may have a “mental problem”? Do you suspect drugs?

Of course the obvious answer is to quit, and maybe I’ll have too… I’ll explain.

I don’t drink a lot, in fact it is extremely rare that I get even slightly intoxicated. But I do like to have a few beers on the weekend. I never go out drinking with “the guys” at bars like I did when I was single, because now that I am married I believe that can be trouble, and I dont want her to worry. So like now, I’m just watchin TV and having a beer like I usually do on Friday night (fun, huh?).

She denies it when I confront her with it, but there is always such disaproval in the way she acts when I drink. Which is strange, because when we met she drank a lot but rarely does now. I still like to though, and I am responsible about it. I never drive if I’ve had even one drink, I don’t get stupid and i have never ONCE said or done anything negative to her while drinking. Am I right to stand my ground and be myself, or should I stop drinking to appease her?
yeah it wouldn’t be that big of a deal to stop, I guess I just feel like I’m being molded or something haha. I’m a engineering student, and after a particularly mentally exhausting week it is nice to have a few to unwind.

Yes, I do take her out, try to include her. Tonight I took her out to dinner, and she did have a beer.

Definately not a religious thing, she’s not religious at all… alcohol is a touchy subject in this country, I’d rather stop drinking than to cause serious problems in our marriage; but at the same time I don’t think it’s healthy for our marriage if I just give in to her whims all the time.
Awesome advice everyone, thanks. BT, yes she used to drink heavily when she was a teenager/early 20′s and it got her into a lot of trouble. That is a big part of why it bothers her. I was raised by parrents who always drank responsibly, so I guess that’s why i dont see the problem with it…. again, thanks everyone.

My wife cheated on me several times. At the time I loved her so much I told her I’ll forgive all of it if she promises not to do it again. We got back together. Then she went on a drug binge and wasn’t taking care of our children, so I left her. A few months later she told me she had changed and so we’re back together again. Now she still has lots of guy friends on the side. They only text occasionally and it’s usually just hi. But given that I’ve been cheated on several times I don’t think she should have guy friends on the side. Now I don’t want to be with her anymore, but I can’t leave her because I don’t want her to blame a divorce on me. And though I don’t trust her I can’t leave her because of the past things since I said this was a fresh start.

Okay, so maybe I was a little tipsy when the cops dragged me away, shirtless, for getting into a fight with that horse outside of Walmart, but I was NOT drunk! And yes, I had had two or twelve beers when I stood up in church, once again shirtless, and urged everyone to join me in “the wave”, but I definitely was not intoxicated; I hold my liquor well. Besides, that was the most boring funeral EVER, and it needed someone to break the depressing mood.

My wife keeps nagging me, though, saying crazy stuff like, “My mother told me not to marry you! She said I’d regret it if I had kids with a man who got an erection around beer!”, and also that I was being a terrible father, and setting a poor example for my kids. That can’t be true, though, since the kids get lots of sympathy gifts from their school faculty and church members, as “the kids with the drunk dad.” All in all, I think she’s making a big deal out of nothing. All men love beer, and I just am relaxing, but I do NOT have a drinking problem. How can I get her to lighten up and face reality?

My wife of 5 years, in 3 days, and high school sweet heart, I believe has an addition problem. There is not one specific thing but whatever is in front of her at the moment. I know she had issues in her life before I came along that I don’t think she’s fully recovered/faced yet. At the current moment we are fighting pretty bad. We have two young boys who are the best thing in our lives. I work full time to support us as she is a stay at home mom. I am actually a General Manager of a movie theater so my hours vary and also can put a strain on our life sometimes. My wife is dealing with depression and addiction. She has been seeing a doctor who has been putting her on different medications to try and help. I think too many medications too quickly. She was just prescribed xanex’s, which she used to “party” on before we were married( I did forget to mention we had broke up for about two years after high school and it was during that time she was taking the pills, smoking weed, and heavy drinking). She picked up her prescription this past Tuesday and by Friday night she had taken the entire bottle, 30 pills. Like I said in the beginning she is just addicted to whatever she can get her hands on – pills, weed, alcohol. I myself do not take pills, I have smoked weed, and rarely drink, especially now. Thursday night after I got home from work, I looked in my wifes purse(yea I know I know thats a sacred place) to see how many pills she had left because I could tell she was not herself during those other two days prior. She had 8 left at that time. I get off of work around 3AMish on Thursday’s so I usually sleep til 10-10:30 on Friday’s. When I woke up, I checked her pills again. She had already taken 4 xanex’s by 10:30AM! I pulled her away from our kids so they would not hear us, and as concerning as I could be without trying to make her angry confronted her about the pills and the fact I knew she had taken all of them. She hit the roof. “Why did you go in my purse?” and things of that nature. If I am honest with myself, I have always known she had an addiction problem before but I thought it was past us. We are now fighting horribly and I have told her I cannot live my life like this and allow our children to be in an environment like this if she cannot function as a thoughtful parent should be, which she can’t if shes messed up like that. She gives me the excuse that when she takes the pills her sexual arousal is up, her motivation to clean the house is up, and she is happier. I try to reason with her but it doesn’t work and actually makes things worse. She was kicked out of high school her senior year for coming to school high on pills(but the teachers thought she was on weed) so this again is not a new problem. We are throwing around the “D” word and it hurts. She calls me names, tells me I’m a bad dad and a bad husband. I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I bust my ass for my family. We live 5 hours from family due to me taking this promotion over a year ago so we have no one locally who can help us through this. She is now telling me that if we get a divorce she will keep the kids and make me pay for her “lifestyle” which she is now accustomed too. Its not like we are living in a mansion or driving around benz’s. We still have our struggles as I have the only income. I don’t want to divorce but I cannot stand being treated this way, lied too and most importantly fear that our kids are not being taken care of properly due to her craziness. Don’t get me wrong she is a good wife and good mom. She could keep do a little more around the house but that really doesn’t matter. I will admit I picked up a simple possession charge for weed when i was 20 years old right after my father passed away from a hard battle with lung/brain cancer. I’ve had 1 job in my life and its been almost 11 years with that company. yea I smoked some but it NEVER affected me or my work habits. How can I help my wife see that she has a bigger problem than either of us can fix, especially me? I cannot help her, I have tried for so long. Also, when I asked her why she took so many pills she said maybe I don’t want to be here anymore( I don’t know if she was joking or not but that’s a serious statement) I also don’t want to sound harsh when I say this either but if we do divorce, I want full custody of our kids. I don’t think its safe for them to be with her like that. I would not want to keep her from them at all but she is not of full sound body and mind. She can be very hurtful and trys to stab me with phrases that will really hurt and she knows that. Not too long ago we(mainly me but she didn’t ever object) brought my 16 year old niece into our house because she was in a very bad spot in her life. my niece was doing very well in school and life in general and all of a sudden moved back to where we are all from with her dad. After the fact, my niece told me things that my wife said to her which were
Spencer, you are an ass…There will be a time in your life that you need help and no one will help you. You will ask why. You will need to think back to this day and here will lie your answer. If you don’t have anything meaningful to say about this, then just move on. I just hope that when you do need help, its not at a time when its life or death.

My apologies for the misspelling. As you, at least the caring people in this world, can tell, I have a lot on my plate. And there’s not enough room for people like you…

She usually drinks during the day when I am at work and is visibly intoxicated when I come home.

My wife is the teacher in junior church, she did a series on the ten commandments, I did the summary of how the ten commandments are ties together, break one break them all. My pastor got upset because I did the summary, I struggle with alcoholism and he feels it wasn’t appropriate to teach the kids although he admitted I am a very good teacher. My view is this, everyone has a sin they struggle with in thier life, through thought, action or deed. I’m upset with his statement to me, and now he asks if he can use our conversation in his sermon! We have people who are self righteous, self involved, come to church once in a while, etc. But I get singled out because I have a drink now and then, no I am not a drunkard, I work hard, pay my bills and my family is wanting for nothing. I’m trying to not let this bug me, but it is. I didn’t satnd in front of the kids and tell them it’s ok to drink, and if they had asked me about it I would have told them frankly that I do have a problem and pray.

Okay, so I’m bitter.
You’d probably call me boring or something; but I stand with the people that find people that do nothing but drink as disturbing. I mean, look at them; when they’re at the bar or in a disco, in a family picnic or even a dinner with their company; it’s like they barely talk, as they’re too busy being swung around by their mood swings and chugging shots.

Just recently I thought this is all a uni thing. You know, you drink yourselves to death, forget your friends and stagger around trying to get laid or punching something, then you wake up and laugh how funny it all was (that you couldn’t remember) and then go and puke on the only toilet in the entire dorm building.
I’ve known people that even had to get their own livers cut out and transplanted after only one year away from the parents. Mentally, alot of them are messed up; so often I was curious on how this kind turn out once the ‘boy/girl’ labels are now inappropriate to explain their actions.

This week, I went with my dad to humor his boss in a communal dinner. It was depressing. It was disgusting. Alot of them were already drunk by the time we arrived and shockingly acted like they were frat/sorority kids. These are people that had served time as commanders, special intelligence nerds and all over 30. They also expect everyone else to treat them like loyalty, yet there they are looking down on us and trying to grope each other. One woman was so drunk two guys were trying to get her to bed later, and the rest just stood around laughing and encouraging them, and from the looks on their faces you’d know they’re relishing the fact that they’re witnessing something this woman would hate herself for doing.

Still, we ditched the party as soon as we could and I immediately got down to an old documentary I saw on drunks. It is a big problem in britain as many treated it as a personality trait to celebrate about. It’s not a class thing or anything, it’s just something people do to say that they’re ‘British’ or ‘Women’.

I don’t know about alcoholism, but how do all these mofos get around with the recession, various date rapes and beatings and breaking families and continue on as if the kids/wife/husband are their own problems and nothings wrong with themselves? Honestly, do any of them snap out of it?
Well, I do drink…but only stuff that tastes good. I spend my time sharing strongbow and just last week I got out a family recipe of sangria.
I do it to be social, not suicidal. Last year I was living with people that drink to the extent where they become like running zombies. I even have a best friend at the time who was from Brittany (now living Toulouse)–even she finds it scary about these people. Us and another girl had a terrible time there as by day we get treated like worms by the girls (18 of them), we couldn’t sleep past 3 with them running around and beating down our doors. Every night we have our communal kitchen (our only place to cook, eat and hold food goods) completely unusable by day time. Won’t go on details but it goes on to “The HELL is wrong with them?”. And then you see it go on past that age to the rest of the age groups.
I dont know, but I rather prefer to hang out with people that would at least wouldnt drink to the point of losing control of their bowels.

My wife of 25 years divorced me this summer due to my alcoholism. I have been sober now for almost three weeks and wanted to see her. She says shes not ready and dosen’t know when it will be. How do I get her back?

• Their President a dry drunk draft dodger pretending to be a “clear-eyed warrior” while he sends thousands to die.
• Their top radio “pundit”/ propagandist a hypocritical active drug user.
• Their top senators and representatives resigned in disgrace after soliciting strangers in public restrooms or bending over pages. (Foley and Craig in the last several months)
• Their templates of “Christian virtue”, like Newt Gingrich, has admitted to cheating on his wife, in a marriage that ended in divorce because of it.

What gives? Is the “party that owns morality” in a state of implosion?
So let me get this straight, sharia: the best defense you can muster for your leaders is “nobdoy’s perfect”?

LOLOLOLOL
Tell ‘em, gravedigger
john: laura bush was in a hit and run car accident that killed her former boyfriend under suspicous circumstances. Yeah, laura bush. Read up.

and had several partners. since then, i have changed my ways and settled down. i think my old ways may have created a sex addiction however. i feel uneasy when I am around pretty girls and I feel like i am constantly craving sex with women. i feel like i am a crack addict. i am scared i am going to do something to destroy my marriage. is there any other way to fix this problem other than professional help? im not sure how my wife would react if i told her this.

She has trouble walking up stairs, getting up from a chair, and getting started walking after standing up.
I first noticed her problem 2.5 yrs. ago. She practically had to crawl upstairs. The 18 mos. ago she broke her rt. shoulder requiring metal socket replacement operation. Her strength and balance got worse. She stopped phy. therapy because it hurt. The she was diagnosed with diabetes 2. All of this has piled on 12 prescription pills known by our family doctor. Can a WebMD medical specialist help us, please?
Here’s the drugs she’s taking: Lotrel, Toprol, Farosemide, Aromasin, Starlix, Temazepan, Lexapro, Fosamax, Allopurinol, Levothyroxine, Baby Asprin, Neurotin

I like to drink whenever I can. My wife says that I probably have a drinking problem. It’s kind of depressing I must say. So in order to deal with this depression I have been trying to drink lots of booze. So far it is working alright. My wife is definitely a lot happier that’s for sure. But occasionally the alcohol wears off so I’m wondering exactly how much should I drink to get over this depression while still somewhat functioning?

My wife has a major cocaine problem what can I give her to get her off it to stop withdrwals she dosnt have in
She doesnt have insuranance; she is getting out of control i need help does any know of anything that will help her come off withdrawals; she looks like death; any help would be appreciated; thanks

My wife is 26 years old and she goes out binge drinking after work and comes home drunk. She always, regrets it the next day and then a few days later or a few weeks later, she does the same thing again. I have confronted her about her drinking and she says I’m the problem because I won’t go out drinking with her.
She lies to me about where she is, when she goes out drinking and sometimes she just stays gone for the whole weekend. Am I crazy or does she have a real problem? What can I do about this?

is it better to hold on to each other and help each other or to get divorced and meet new sober life partners? we love each other and been married for 3 years, no kids… she seems to want the divorce coz she feels we will always relapse together… what do you think?