How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Posts Tagged ‘know’

I just don’t get it, am i missing something? is religion not the cause of %95 of bloodshed in the middle east?

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http://www.theonion.com/content/node/51849

JERUSALEM—As an uneasy truce between Israel and Hezbollah continues, millions of average men and women in the Holy Land are turning to the one simple comfort that has always seen them through the darkest days of their troubled history: the steadfast guidance of their religious faith.

“I take solace in knowing that my faith is a sanctuary, an escape from the bloodshed and turmoil,” said Haifa resident Yigal Taheri, who last week lost his wife and newborn daughter
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am i missing something? is religion insanity i.e. doing the same thing over and over expecting different results?

My son has been having reoccuring bleeding from the nose at night and sometimes in the day. Me and my wife have rarely bleed from nose so i know it can’t be passed down. But in the other hand our “babysitter” has been having the same, bloody noses and i have found lots of q-tips in the bathroom trash can full of her blood. One time i caught her with q-tip up her nose and said “my nose was bleeding , and i don’t know why”. This raised red flag in my head but what is also bodering me is that almost everytime we make contact with her she always has the “sniffles” like whipping her runny nose on her hand and if she really sniffs drugs this will make contact with my son. This is why i think that my son has a reoccuring bloody nose. In fact i know for sure she is a heroin user back in her old days, but once a user always a user. there is much more i want to say but please can anyone help me? im thinking of drug test, but how can you when the babysitter is mother-in-law? i know you are saying “this is your son you are talking about” but what if i’am wrong i would feel bad. But what if i’m right? I’ll send her to jail or rehab program. and never let her touch my baby again untill i know she is fully CLEAN! I NEED ANSWERS!

my grandma gave my uncle her house and he got hooked on drugs and lost his job and the house….he can keep a job and he ows people money…..both is parents passed away last may…..and he lives on a lake that just flooded and he lost almost all his stuff……his daughters mom wont let him see her and he is really depressed….he told his wife that he was going to kill himself when he got to work and she found a big knife under the floor mat of the car….he got drunk and was poppin pills the other night and he went to the bar looking 4 a fight……..he got sent to madison to one of then detox places and he is back home….i want to talk to his to let him know that he isnt a screw up he just has to get his life back on track and that we still live him and that nothin is his fault……wat should i say?

Hi,to cut a long story very short i married a guy,thought i,d finally met the one after my first husband had an affair .Everything was great,we had fallen totally for each other got married and had three beautiful kids together.Downside,he got depression and anxiety,hasnt worked for 3 years because of this and i financially supported him even working two jobs when i was pregnant,wanting to do anything to help him get better.He would when on a bad day go out alone buy a bottle of vodka from local shop and get very drunk.probably in the end at least one to two times a month.We tryed AA, but both thought he is not an alcoholic just misuses it when low.Antidepressants didnt help either.He tried training for a new job that hasnt been able to get work,i guess people are wary of his history.We have beeen separated for six months after he became impossible to live with,being needy,saying i didnt show him enough love and attention,totally draining me .i was walking on eggshells in the end,he takes things the wrong way often,I am very loving and affectionate but it has never been enough.My family and friends say i could not have done anymore to help him,that most would have left him years ago.But i cant break away. i wish i didnt love him so much but i do,he has been the only man to smother me with love and affection and beautiful words and is also very loving with our kids. The truth is i feel as his wife responsible for helping him,he has no friends to speak of as he stopped making the effort,his family only ring once every two months,i,m all he,s got.He has said himself that i probably should have left him.He was in a relationship years ago with an alcoholic and spent 3 years trying to help her and people told him to leave the same way they are telling me,he says he cant believe he has turned into what she was with me,and understands why people say you cant help him.So what do i do? i feel stuck in a hole,a no win situation,miserable with him or without.He is trying to get a job and going to college again ,everyone says i,ve heard all this before.He goes on about dreading the day i find someone else and that he still feels i,m his wife and he still loves me madley. An old male friend has contacted me through facebook and has split from his longterm wife and wants to meet up,he says we could help each other through,.I would never have cheated on my husband,if i met this man even though we are separated i would feel a cheat and i know the wasy my husband thinks,he would say i,ve cheated.Help me please,how do you finally tear away from someone you love so strongly when they seem to have this hold over you.This other guy is a real gent,i have known him since we were kids,would we be wrong to meet up?guess i,m scared of being alone with four kids too…thank you so mch for reading my crapxxxxx
This has been going on for four years now ,how much do you give and for how long?We have split 3 times and always end up here.i am feeling resentful now.
i feel i have given him more than a fair break and that loving him is ruining me.the other guy has been separated a long time from his wife as i have ,we are both good honest people who have given everything.i am confused,i am not about to sleep with this man its just a shoulder to cry on if i need it.

My husband is a wonderful, wonderful man. He’s a great father, he treats me like a princess, BUT he’s an alcoholic. I left him about 6 months ago (drove 2,700 miles cross country) because he wouldn’t get help and it was getting out of control. I didn’t want to stay in an environment like that with our 2 small children. To make a long story short, he ended up going to rehab, and getting sober. He wanted to be in WA with us, so we agreed he’d stay in a “sober house” for a while first, then if he stayed sober he could come home. All that was great. He’s been sober about 5 months now. The roles are totally reversed now, I work 50 hours a week at a job I love, and he stays home with the kids and works part time. He hasn’t been loving staying home, so we have been talking about him working again. No pressure from my end, financially we are ok now. This morning he was extra grumpy, but we brought kids to day care, I got a few new things for work, then went to work. He was supposed to pick up the kids since I worked till 8. well, at 6 I called to say hey, he was drunk, kids left at daycare. I had to leave work and go get them. I cried and cried and tried to talk to him, but no use talking to a drunk person. I told him to get dressed, and we dropped him off at an AA meeting. He looked miserable and mad. gave him a kiss, said I’d pick him up in an hour. I went back, some guy told me they tried to talk to him, he didn’t want to talk, took off walking. There’s a huge fair downtown tonight where the meeting was, a million people out, so I just came home and put the kids to bed. He hasn’t called. I looked at the search history on the computer, he was looking at “amtrack” this morning when I was still home, from WA to TX. He’s from TX. And he had my phone today, he called his Dad who lives in TX. So, looks like he’s been thinking about leaving. He told me he went to Tacoma to find out about the local electrical union, which he was in before. He did go, he’s got some guys cards. So it seems he wants to get a good job again, and everything should be fine. But he got drunk and didn’t go pick up the kids (who have never been picked up late ever before, and it was embarrassing because day care called him, he didn’t even bother to call, and he lied and said he was having car trouble and would “be there later”) I’m FURIOUS!!!!! But I’m not taking it out on him, just trying to figure out what the real problem is and help him. I realize that I can’t. And I’m not going to live my life with an alcoholic, lying, irresponsible husband. I deserve better, I am a good wife, I work hard, I’m a good mom, and I really freakin try. Our love life is fine, everything was just fine (I thought)…so I guess my only real option here is divorce. I’ll never fully trust him again. Where do I go from here? I mean, should I start looking for a room mate? I don’t know how I’ll manage without his income, and all the help is is to me. I just don’t know what the heck to do…I know I have to keep going foreward…what’s the next step?

Well, here it goes; My wife and I have been together for about 9 years. throughout the years, I was able to support her, I busted my ass working and did what a good family man was supposed to do. She took my two children in from a previous marriage in and she took care of them as if they were hers. The last two years however, I became addicted to opiates and started to become “a piece of s***”. Needles to say, things got really bad and we decided that I would come back to my mom’s house and get my s*** together until I was ready to return home. I was on my way to detox and we had plans to move out of state and she supported my efforts of recovery by coming down with the kids about twice a month and taking care of my “sensual” needs. We were in the movies seeing “UP” with OUR two kids, ages 2 yrs (girl) and 10 months (boy). The person (Terry) that she had been seeing was a mutual friend of ours that lives 50 yards away from our house. In the middle of the movie, my fone starts receiving text messages from Terry which were supposedly forwarded texts from my wife to Terry. VERY SEXUALLY MESSAGES!, the last two where “The 10 month old is my baby” and “Dude, this is Terry, your wife and I have been F******”!

You can only imagine what happened…if interested, write an email and I’ll give you details :o)

But to make a long story short, my wife finally confessed to having an affair with him. However, she says that the affair had just started and that the baby is REALLY mine. I don’t know…Im Mexican, she’s white, and Terry is white. The kid has my ears and general looks, but he also has blue eyes like him. So, I don’t know how far back it really goes. My wife had broken up with him before coming down to the movies with me and that’s why he flipped, because she wanted to be with me and not with him. My wife also tells me that their “thing” was more about money than anything, he had money I didn’t have to give her and he got lucky. She didn’t really want to be with him. Again, I don’t know.

I do know that Terry was VERY angry at her and me because I didn’t just let her go like I was supposed to. Terry wanted her REALLY BAD!, but he doesn’t realise that we have a family together and there is NO WAY she would let me go with so much at stake. I think that Terry saw this as an opportunity to make up for lost time….He is almost 50 and my wife is 27 (I know, sick hu?) and I’m 34. He f****d up his own family before cause of drugs and here he sees a nice little family that he could maybe squeeze into..in the process squeezing me out. We r still trying to work it out, but I don’t know what to do. and then the baby? does their thing really go back for almost two years? Can I ever forgive her? Please, help me sleep :o)

Thanks for your time.

I can’t imagine this is a normal response for a woman. However I can understand that she resorts to violence due to her prior marriage being physically abusive towards her.

For a back story tonight I worked a short 9 hour shift, and my wife had plans to go bar hopping with friends. I did not have a problem with this as I trust my wife. However about 12:30 in the AM I get a phone call from my wife’s step-sister telling me that my wife is sticking her tongue down another man’s throat.

Now this certain step-sister has been known to cause problems in the past so her word is suspect. However I most certainly jump in the car (with approval from my boss) and head to where my wife is. I don’t catch her doing anything, and from what I can tell nothing has happened, but I do ask her to get in the car to remove herself from the situation. One of which I didn’t fully understand nor which she could fully fathom due to the fact of her being intoxicated.

She goes ballistic in the car, completely hysterical with the incorrect emotions to the words, one minute she’s crying the next shes attacking (verbally). Now I do go back to work, was gone maybe about 10 mins. tops, and finish my shift with the wife waiting. Once we return home the fight ensues.

Now I’m an intelligent man and I understand that every story has two sides, and maybe what is accused didn’t happen. So I let her carry on with her theatrical performance. Once she resolved into angry tears completely losing it emotionally I grabbed her upper arms, midway above the elbows, and tried to steady her, in what I thought was a comforting way. Out of nowhere she goes nuts and starts trying to choke me. Now to be honest I’m a former Marine and physically intimidating. Regardless I did the only thing I could think of which was just to push. What else could I do? I most certainly couldn’t be a man hitting his wife!!! I tried to help her up, and once she was up she farking tried to give me a right hook straight to my cheek. While I blocked right as it made contact (I was taken by surprise) I still consider it a fact that she hit me.

I don’t know what to do. She swears I deserve it. Although I can’t even imagine how. I wasn’t out drinking. I wasn’t accused of kissing another woman. I wasn’t yelling, screaming or cursing. I listened and tried to comfort, and she took my attempt at comfort as an attempt of aggression.

Now she says she did nothing wrong, and that if she called the cops it would be me going to jail because it’s her that has the scuffed up knee and I only have a scratch on my neck.

How do I reconcile? What am I supposed to do? My first instinct is to send her packing.

situation 1yr marriage wife wont let go of older kids 17 19 21.i feel like our new start has never began.wife blames me for her kids not being around her well lets see i got set up with a drug charge by the 19yr old and 17yr wont follow home rules.21yr old has her own huspand but still wants her mommy daily. and in the mean time its always my fault.i dont keep her kids away from her but she is always telling them diffrent. i have 3 kids of my own that i dont get to see but i do pay child support on all 3 of them and support my wife and share every thing with her. its so bad that SEX dont even happen in my marriage does any one have any advice other than counseling. try it .

He then indulges in Alcoholic Drinks

My husband was in an accident a year and a half ago and since then he has been taking percocet and oxycontin. He gets them prescribed from the doctor but goes through them in less then a month and ends up getting more from friends. I try telling him that I notice he acts different but he keep blaming it on the accident, saying that he didn’t ask to get into an accident and that it wasn’t his fault he got into one. When he doesn’t have them he can’t sleep at night because his body aches and he throws up constantly. Im not sure what to do, our close friends notice the change also. I don’t work and we have three small children, im not sure what to say without sounding like a nagging wife. I need help.

I’m a quite prominent dentist in my area. I hit my wife who called the police on me. They took me to a detox cell (it was a weekend, so I wasn’t working), now I am facing possibly having my dental license suspended for 6 months AND losing my wife. I need suggestions on what I can do. I have a lawyer…but I need to win her back… and keep my job.

My mom says that John Travolta’s wife wrote a book about de-toxing for kids, after their kid almost died from carpet fumes?

Anyone know what she is talking about *lol*

I don’t know what to make of this- why would she do this to her son?
My hubby comes from a family where alcoholism is rampant among several family members. At least two have died gruesome deaths (esophagus ruptured and relative bled to death- the MD said this was caused by heavy drinking that caused liver failure/tension on the esophagus….), hubby’s uncle is unable to work because his alcoholism is so bad, hubby’s aunt has cirhrosis of the liver from drinking and does not qualify for a liver transplant….

I think you get the picture as to what alcohol has done to his extended family members.

Hubby’s Mom does not drink on a regular basis- maybe a glass of wine for special occasions. Hubby’s dad drinks at least 4 beers (his drink of choice) a day (sometimes more). One time his Mom called my hubby in tears (we live 5 states away) because her husband (hubby’s dad) had gone out on a bender and was severely drunk and irrational when he came home. Hubby’s dad was unfairly accused of something at work which led to this drinking binge. Hubby and his Mom do not think hubby’s dad has a drinking problem because he is employed, doesn’t drink on the job, etc.

In other words, he doesn’t have a drinking problem/dependency like the other family members because he is functional.

When hubby and I were dating, his mom mentioned to me- more than once- that she and her husband were ‘relieved’ (her exact word) when hubby went off to college and started drinking , because they were afraid he would ‘never touch alcohol’ . He was a good kid in high school and didn’t drink. The way it was said to me made me think that his Mom thought he was somewhat ‘nerdy’ for not drinking in high school. Hubby’s Mom even made a point to tell the same thing to MY Mom at one point (my Mom was dumbfounded as to why hubby’s mom even told her this).

Throughout the first few years of our marriage, my hubby’s drinking began to escalate. He was drinking 6 or more (sometimes 8-10) beers every night at home. Even though we were financially strapped he continued to spend close to $75 a week on beer alone. He didn’t think it was a problem.

The stress of this along with other things caused severe strain on our marriage. I was about to leave him and drinking was one of the main factors. Hubby decided he ‘did not want to lose his wife and kids’ (his words) and decided to stop drinking. The week he decided to quit coincided with a visit he had planned to see his parents (I was 8 months pregnant at the time and couldn’t go).

Right before dinner he told his parents he had decided to quit drinking because he felt he had developed a problem. He didn’t mention anything about his Dad’s drinking because he still felt his Dad didn’t have a problem- he was only talking about himself and his decision to quit.

At the dinner table his Mom poured him a glass of wine and pushed in front of him and encouraged him to drink it. She said she didn’t think he had a problem with drinking and all he needed to do was just have a few drinks and then stop himself. Hubby said no, but she insisted.

I am having trouble understanding WHY a mother whose own sister and brother have debilitating drinking problems-which she herself has characterized as terrible- would encourage her son to drink when he has announced that he has a drinking problem and is quitting alcohol altogether.

Why would she do that? What do you make of what she did?

I have a 27 year old son Who started drinking around 4-5 years ago. Since about a year ago it’s gotten out of control. He’s in serious condition and is in deep need of severe intense help. He has a wife they married about 4 months ago and his wife recently learned she was pregnant with their first child. He has no financial resources except for what he gets from Human Resources. From what his wife and I know thus far the places we looked at thus far doesn’t cover his medical insurance. Having no financial resources I can not help pay for his treatment if he was to receive any. He is close to death if he doesn’t get some help NOW. Does Anyone here reading this now know of Intervention programs that will take Medicaid alone or combined Medicaid with some financial monies at low minimum cost. If it was to be at low minimum cost we his family might be able to find a way to get it together or even maybe easier yet if the Intervention program would accept his medicaid insurance combined with paying in monthly installments we may be able to have an easier way to working it out. I come here in love for my son, I can’t lose him. If anyone has any kind of suggestions where his wife, myself, and his sister can him the much needed yet very necessary care he needs to help him beat this undesirable disease of alcoholism. He just lost his dad in Sept. 2007 please help him to not be the next, as his dad also was an alcoholic and I don’t want my son ending up where his dad is this very moment—dead. Thanks for taking time to read this as well as allowing me to vent a bit of my frustartion and pain over this. I have no where to turn so that’s my reason of why I came here to all who now read this in hope of getting someone to make suggestions or help refer him somewhere. He’s presently in the hospital in the Detox ward. This is his 3rd time there since late October. He can’t continue life as he is now.
Rehab and A.A. have been looked into. He’s participated in them. Research on the two have been made with no success. It’s unrelistic to thinkon my part but he needs one on one daily care for anywhere between I’d 6-12 months or longer in an intervention facility. unrealististic on my part as I realize that there’s others in need of help & not just him who can’t be denied because he’s there but equal. Should anyone have suggestions, ideas or could be of help to him I realize one must be caustious when dealing with situations online therefore if anyone would want to give further information let me know through here. I can suppy you with my E-mail address as well as the name, address, and location where he’s at. You may investigate on your own so you’d kown the place is for legit while at the same time allow me to take safety precautions needed for him and the family because of the fact all this is taking place by means of the computer
Rehab and A.A. have been looked into. He’s participated in them. Research on the two have been made with no success. It’s unrelistic to thinkon my part but he needs one on one daily care for anywhere between I’d 6-12 months or longer in an intervention facility. unrealististic on my part as I realize that there’s others in need of help & not just him who can’t be denied because he’s there but equal. Should anyone have suggestions, ideas or could be of help to him I realize one must be caustious when dealing with situations online therefore if anyone would want to give further information let me know through here. I can suppy you with my E-mail address as well as the name, address, and location where he’s at. You may investigate on your own so you’d kown the place is for legit while at the same time allow me to take safety precautions needed for him and the family because of the fact all this is taking place by means of the computer

Can a person cheat and truly not know why they did it? She is bipolar and was a practicing alcoholic when it happened though she was NOT drunk when she had sex a few times at work. She blames the alcoholism as to why she did it though not drunk at the time. She was drunk all of the time but when at work…she said the alcohol made her a monster. She said she hated herself and everybody else and was cheating to try and make herself feel better…though she said it did not. I had a professional intervention done and sent her to rehab. The day before she got out of rehab she confessed the cheating to me. I did not catch her. She confessed as she wants to have a good relationship with me…I cant seem to get beyond the fact that she does not know why she did it other than to try and make herself feel better.

My wife of 5 years and I have 1 child together a 3 year old son. About two months ago
I had a professional intervention done and put her into rehab for her alcoholism.

She was in rehab for 30 days and got out 1 month ago. The day before she got out of rehab she told me she had had sex in a parking lot with 2 different coworkers on 3 separate occasions over a 3 week period in March. One she had sex with once and the other twice right after she got off work for the night. She told me this before getting out of rehab because she said the alcohol made her a monster and she wanted me to know so I could move on or forgive her and start anew life with her sober. She swears she will never drink again as it makes her a monster. She says if it was not for being an alcoholic that she would not have been in the state of mind of wanting to do anything to make herself feel better about herself. She says she would not like a person or think very highly of them if they behaved as she had…she swears she is not that person. In the last two weeks she has signed a post nuptial agreement in which she gets nothing if we get divorced…I get everything we acquire in the future including the house, cars and savings that we have now. She is trying to prove to me that she will never do such a thing again.

I knew of one other incident of my wife cheating with another coworker prior to the two above. That occurred in February and we started marriage counseling because of it. She followed that guy after work to his apartment and only kissed with him and left before anymore happened because she said she felt too guilty. After this incident she always called me to let me know where she was and what she was doing to rebuild trust.

She would call me everyday she worked on her breaks to talk and say she loved me. She would call me when she got off work to tell me she was on her way home (we live about 10 minutes from her work) and say she loved me. But what was really going on is she was making out with a coworker at work before and after calling me on her break. Then she would get off work and go have sex in the parking lot and call me immediately after and say she loved me and was on her way home.

We recently moved to another state away from all my family and friends because I thought all I needed was my wife. How long can I expect to be in pain from this? I am miserable and think about suicide all the time…
Child is included…I get custody

I did not know this until a few minutes ago.

http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0geu.NMpLxH9yMBoT1XNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTE4a3I0cDE3BHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDMQRjb2xvA2FjMgR2dGlkA0RGUjVfNzcEbANXUzE-/SIG=13frkfru2/EXP=1203631564/**http%3a//www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/us_elections/article3295472.ece

I was looking up at her, struggling to understand what was happening. Her mouth was moving but I couldn’t hear . . . the noise was loud . . . so loud. She was pretty, with blonde hair loosely pulled back from her face. I could see directly into her eyes which were clouded with concern. She lifted my head up, her hands cool to the touch . . . bent down to meet me, and spoke directly into my ear. “You’re going to be fine. I’m going to put these headphones on you now to muffle the sound. You’re in a helicopter . . . stay with us . . .” I then felt the jostling as we were lifted up to the sky. That is the last thing I remember before my world turned to black.

It’s been three years and I’m still here! In remembering that Saturday morning I continue to be amazed. My symptoms had in no way sent out warning signals of an impending heart attack. I was just tired . . . ! I had been working a lot so it was perfectly explainable fatigue. My upper arms ached a little bit, but again, explainable, and nothing that a nice hot shower couldn’t cure.

I am an interior designer and had been installing furniture in a model home that week, so my “symptoms” all made perfect sense. They made perfect sense to me, that is, until about 4:00 A.M., Saturday morning, when I woke up from a sound sleep for no apparent reason. Within minutes I became nauseous, short of breath, and was sweating profusely. I knew that I was in it . . .I just didn’t know what “it” was! I was young, healthy, never had any chest pain, jaw or neck pain, no pain shooting down my left arm . . . even still, I knew that I was in real trouble, as in call 911 kind of trouble. It all happened so fast. Seemingly, without warning, I had entered into a world of terms and conditions that were foreign to me. Terms like LAD and RCA, angioplasty, septic shock and stents . . . words I knew existed, but for someone else. Certainly not for me.

Because life’s biggest changes rarely give us an advance warning, I was caught unprepared in knowing how to react. In the days and months that followed, I experienced a myriad of feelings. I felt thankful . . . to God for answering the multitude of “beggy” prayers that had been offered up on my behalf . . .to my care givers whose compassion and giving hearts were such a gift . . . to my ‘never-say-uncle’ family and friends who held vigil by my bedside for days, refusing to give up on me. Yes. . . thankful, fearful, hopeful, wanting answers, NOT wanting answers . . . often engulfed in waves of anxiety and fear. Thankful I had seemingly beaten the odds, but angry that I was now included in a statistical bank I never asked to be a part of in the first place!

Though I didn’t realize it at the time, the roller coaster ride of emotions I was experiencing was very common. My life had been interrupted, my innocence stripped away, I had been forced to suddenly come face to face with my own mortality . . . and mourn the loss of my health!

I am well aware that I am not the only one who has experienced a life altering, totally unexpected event in their life . . . but when it is you going through it, right or wrong, you feel very alone. In reality, my heart attack affected not only me, but family and friends alike. They too had been traumatized. Each of us had to find our own path, in our own time, that would take us to a place of understanding and acceptance of what had happened!

I completed a cardiac rehabilitation program and received a bright red T-shirt which announced to the world that I had indeed stayed the course. Most days, pen in hand, I transferred my inner most thoughts into my red leather journal. I poured onto those tear stained pages my feelings of gratitude along with fears and frustrations, all the while praying that I didn’t die before destroying the evidence that I had so nakedly revealed. I searched unsuccessfully for articles from people who had undergone a similar experience to mine . . . looking for reassurances that I would be able to regain my life, that the feelings I was experiencing were normal, and that no, . . . I wasn’t going crazy. I was on a perpetual quest for answers. As a ‘surviver’ I wanted to know why I was still here? What was my purpose?

I once read that when we need it the most, God’s grace will come to us like tiny stitches in torn fabric. In March of 2005, nine months after my heart attack, there was, splashed across the front page of newspapers around the World, the controversial details of the Terri Schindler-Schaivo case. All were asking the same question. Should they, or should they not remove her life sustaining feeding tube. The Schindler family had been locked in a decade plus long legal battle with their son-in-law over the care and custody of their then, 41 year old daughter. Terri had suffered massive brain damage when she suddenly, at the young age of 26, collapsed at her home from what was described as a mysterious cardio-respiratory arrest for which no cause was ever determined. She was not on life support, she was not brain dead, but she was in a severe vegetative state from which, according to most doctors, she more than likely would not recover. Opinion polls were being taken. Individuals as well as special interest groups and religious organizations were getting involved, demanding that their voices be heard. It seemed to be the number one topic around water coolers across this country, and elsewhere. Conservatives and liberals alike were impassioned, taking staunch, unwavering positions.

I was vacillating back and forth between the parents views and the husbands position. That is until I happened to read what later proved to be, for me, life changing words from a newspaper interview with Rick Warren, author of the book, ‘The Purpose Driven Life’. When asked his opinion on the Terri Schiavo case Rick Warren answered without hesitation. “The answer for me is clear,” he said. “I am firmly against the removal of the tube. God put each of us here for a purpose, and that includes Terri Schiavo. We may never know or understand what her purpose is, but she has one. We all do. We are all necessary pieces of God’s very large puzzle coming together in order to complete his plan. It’s not about us . . . it’s about him.”

That March day was life changing for me. After so much searching I felt I had finally found the answer I had been looking for. It was alright if I didn’t know my specific purpose in life, or how my ‘piece’ would eventually fit into God’s overall puzzle. The self inflicted burden of responsibility I had been dragging around for so long was suddenly being lifted. What a tremendous feeling of relief!

It has been over two years since I happened upon that interview. Since then I have continued to make strides in regaining control of my life, no longer feeling like a victim. I view my heart attack as “a very significant event in my life”, but no longer allow it to be the “main event.”

Do I have the luxury of assuming that a headache is just a headache? That muscular aches, nausea or fatigue are just that, nothing more? Unfortunately no, . . . and the reality is that I probably never will again. But today I’m happy, healthy, and would like to think much wiser than I was three years ago. Many of the things I once felt were important aren’t . . . and vice versa. I don’t forget to tell the people I love, that I love them, and I do remember to thank God for each new day. I have learned how to not say yes when I want to say no, and I burn the designer candles and drink from the good crystal whenever I want! All of these are benefits I’ve awarded myself through age and the sum of my experiences . . . all of them.

The issues surrounding women with heart disease is very REAL. Sobering statistics have shown that one in three women will die from cardiovascular disease. Because their symptoms present themselves so differently, and so often go undetected, more women will die from heart related problems than from the next seven leading causes of death combined. I, like so many other women, had heard these statistics in the past, but obviously had never “HEARD” them!

Thankfully, great strides and many successes, have recently been made by the American Heart Association in an effort to significantly reduce disablity and death from cardiovascular disease. Our legislative leaders, most of which have been personally touched by this issue . . . either through a wife, mom, sister, daughter or friend . . . are now standing together and agreeing that heart disease research, prevention, and treatment for women needs to be a top priority!

i was taking LSD and now im a hippy what can i do about it? i wanna my children back and i can’t because my wife has a restraining order what shoud it do?

my wife was injured this past weekend when she was struck head-on by a drunk driver.She is 8 mths. pregnant and suffered a broke collar-bone and messed her feet up,along w/numerous bruises.Sadly,the other driver died as a result of this.We are not out to gain tons of money because of this,but feel she should get her vehicle replaced,along w/ all of her medical bills taken care of.Is that asking to much?We have not been in contact w/ his insurance company yet.What should our first step be?Also what if there is something wrong w/ our baby when he is born as a result of this,should he be responsible for this?