How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Archive for the ‘WIFE’S ALCOHOLISM TREATMENT QUESTIONS’ Category

(We take sour sips
From life’s lush lips
And we shake, shake, shake the hips
In relationships)

Stomp out this disaster town
You’ll put your eyes to the sun and say,
“I know you’re only blinding to keep back
What the clouds are hiding.”

And we might’ve started singing just a little soon
We’re throwing stones at a glass moon

[Chorus}
Whoa oh, we're so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning

Whoah-oh...

We keep the beat
With your blistered feet
And we bullet the words
At the mockingbirds singing
Slept through the weekend and dreaming
Of sinking with the melody
Of the cliffs of eternity
Got postcards from my
Former self saying:
[The Carpal Tunnel Of Love lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

“How’ve you been?”

And we might’ve said goodbyes
Just a little soon
(Stomp out this disaster town)
Whoa, Robbing lips and
Kissing banks under this moon

[Chorus] [x2]

Ohh…

(It was ice cream headaches and sweet avalanche!)
(When the pearls in our shells got up to dance!)
(You call me a bad tipper of the cradle!)
(Tired young fawns on hunter’s lawns!)
(We’re the has-beens of husbands!)
(Sharpening the knives of young wives!)
(Take two years and call me when you’re better!)
(Take tears that are mine, find yourself wetter!)

[Chorus]

Woah..ooo!
We’re so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning

I’m 15 and this is surrealism poetry. It’s not done yet, I need to add more stanzas and switch some words around. What do you think?

Apples:

Think about how many apples have been in the world.

The tall leathery dinosaurs ate their ancestors
One whole tree at a time. They were different back
then. They were more pink than red and had jagged leaves.

They grew, lush and shiny, in the trees along the life-giving
bounds of the Euphrates as jungle drums pounded
in the twilight.

They traveled the Silk Road along with precious
stones and porcelain slung across Dromedary camels,
protecting them from the sandstorms and sun.

Caesar lay in his marble bed and his many wives fed him.
Grapes, bananas, mangos, peaches, but apples
were his favorite. He ordered 100 barrels of them to his
palace. The apples waited, readily available, just as
they always had been and always would be.

The peasants of Medieval Europe picked them from
their withering, drought-stricken orchards. Serfs’
teeth were so rotten, they stayed, lodged in the apples.

There are famous apples. The one that gave Isaac
the universal theory of gravity. The one that tempted Eve
in the Garden with the snake.

I was born and raised in Seattle, and then moved to Portland OR to pursue my career. I loved the water and the trees and the lush greenery. I loved the fresh air, the cultural diversity, and the liberal political environment. There were good movies, good beer, good bookstores and good restaurants to enjoy. I even met the love of my life in the Great Northwest!

Turns out she was from Utah. A few years into our relationship, she told me she suffered from Seasonal Affect Disorder, that she missed her family, and that she wanted to move back. I protested, saying that the state is controlled by the LDS, that it’s too dry and hot for me, that it’s too conservative, too car-centered, and lacking in any real cultural diversity.

She was stubborn, and I agreed to move. Turns out I was right on all accounts. This is the weirdest, most boring place I have ever lived. Almost everyone is both white and Mormon. The majority of the restaurants are chains like Red Robin, Olive Garden or Applebees. Although there is a scared, huddled little mass of liberals (they all go to the Unitarian Church near the UofU), and one little funky district in the whole state of Utah (Sugar House), the city and state is almost universally conservative and Republican. There is no life here. People drive everywhere. The streets (even downtown) are as wide as freeways. The public transit sucks. The only cool independent businesses in the city (Sam Weller’s Bookstore, the Dancing Crane, Blue Boutique) have all been forced out of their original locations by developers who knock the buildings down and then fail to build new ones.

Did I mention everyone is Mormon?

I’m trying really hard to adjust, to see the bright side of things, but I’m failing miserably. Why can’t I get used to Utah… to the dry air, the complete lack of vegetation, the heavy snowfall, and the LDS controlled government? Where can I get whatever pills they take here to become wide-eyed “happy” Stepford Wives?

Hey, welcome to Thursday!

The more stuff I learn about this guy, the more I dislike him. Not so much for his deviant interests but rather that he posed as this “law and order” crusader while leading this entire secret life. Of course, the cheating on your spouse part goes without saying. And why do these wives always “stand by their man” during the press conferences? What a jag bag!

Lush – Hypocrite
Genitorturers – House Of Shame
Nine Inch Nails – The Downward Spiral
Fugazi – Fell, Destroyed
Ana Maria – I can answer that one; screwed for life!
♫ՖքØØķ¥♫ – Pretty much. These idiots think they’ll never get caught.
mustang_girlie – That song is just too perfect, LOL. MSI in general is. You and Spooky were all over that one. :)

Being the loving husband that i am, i willingly took my darling wife to watch twilight not once, twice, but THREE TIMES! well anyone, here’s my question:
the movie takes Place in Forks, WA. but i looked up the town. within several miles of the town’s radius, it looks like a desert, probably from overlogging (being that it IS sorrounded by lush rainforest)
But they didn’t even film in the town. when i look at pics, forks WA doesn’t even look remotely similiar to portland oregon. and I guess instead of phoenix, they filmed in pasadena.

i think that’s a shame, because I suppose the intention of the location of forks was that it was supposed to be even crummier than phoenix, but from actual photos of the town, i’ll assume that forks is pretty ugly and depressing also, unlike the depiction in the film.

I have more q’s about the film, i’ll post them separately.

My husband has a cocaine addiction. He was a great guy before this. He was my highschool sweetheart and we have been together 16 years. 3 months ago I found out he had this addiction. He has ruined us financially. He has totally messed up our children by leaving for 2-3 day binges every week. I am kicking him out of our home and then allowing him to come back over and over again. He is becoming violent and very emotionally abusive. He is having affairs and 1 night stands. Everything he says to me is a lie anymore. I have stuck by him because I made a vow and I am true to my word but I am soooooo tired. I truely can not fix him. We will lose our home and he has lost his job. It is a total nightmare. I am looking for other women in my situation for support and an outlet. Please email me.

Can you give me an analysis of this poem, pls?

I loved her like the leaves,
The lush green leaves of spring
That pulled down the willows
on the bank’s edge
where we walked
while she was of this world
I built my life on her.
But man cannot flout the laws of this world.
To the shimmering wide fields
hidden by the white cloud,
White as a white silk scarf
She soared away like the morning bird
hidden from our world like the setting sun.
The child – the gift she left behind-
He cries for food; but always
finding nothing that I might give him.
I pick him up and hold him in my arms.
On the pillows where we lay,
My wife and I, as one,
I pass the daylight lonely ’til the dusk.
The black night sighing ’til the dawn.
I grieve and I grieve and know no remedy.
I ache and know no road where I might meet her.

Thanks :P

I have been married for 8 years and have 2 boys. I feel that there is no hope for my marriage. I am not loved by my husband, who states that he is still here because of the children. If I stay, my children will be exposed to alcoholism and verbal abuse but if I leave there is the possibilty that the children will lose their father to alcohol. My mind keeps telling me that it’s not my fault and what he says to me is not true. I’m not the perfect wife and not the perfect mother. But I’m not God awful either. It’s like I’m dammed if I stay and I’m dammed if Ieave. I cannot bear another episode of hearing put downs when my husband is drunk. I can’t help but fear that I will blamed by his family if I leave and he drinks himself to death. He doesn’t drink everyday, but he goes on binges when we have unresolved issues. The issues are mainly about cooking or that I don’t take care of him the way I should. It’s getting worse and I don’t know where to turn for help

I have a recurring dream. I had it again the other night. It was of my old boyfriend’s mother (who never liked me) asking me to come to her house. I go to her house which in the dream is on the bank of a river with a lot of lush greenery on the banks. Her real house is not near a river. The conversation in each of the dreams has been slightly different. This time she apologized and said that I was now ready to be married, and will be a good wife. Then her son shows up and is shocked to see me there, and does not want to talk to me, but ends up doing so as a friend.

The really weird thing is I just got married a couple of weeks ago to a great guy.

Gnarled Wings
You walk along the paved road in a lush garden
The lustrous beams of the midnight sun covers you
As you hear a call from beyound the grave
your wife, she beckons for you to come
your feet hurrying you to a lone house
you enter the door, and you see her there
dark blue eyes, long black hair
you reach to grab her hand
to weep upon her breast
she recedes into shadow
you desperately look
a gleam catches your eye
you take hold with a strong grasp
weeping like a small boy lost in market
the representation of death upon your neck
you sob as a slender streak of crimson bands your throat
the love of your life walks back into view, hands over her eyes, weeping

you wake, she over you
a gloomy, dark clouded sky
“why?” her sweet voice asks
“to be with you,” your voice pleasantly replies
A hand cased with blood lies upon her shoulder
a man with great beauty you notice behind your dearest
Torn and gnarled black wings fold around him like a cloak of night
he smiles warmly at you and shows you his bloody hand, which you take
“God?” you ask in a pulled voice, and he shakes his head, a desolate scowl upon his face
“No, my child,” he replies in a majestic voice, “I am not he, who is evil.”
Yur eyes grow even more perplexed at these last trio of words
A scream from above and then a bright bolt of white light
“He has condemnded my name with words of lie,”
The fallen angel says with pain
Your mind then relalizes
Lucifer

The question isnt should i leave him…because I know that is an option. I have tried. it has not yet come to that, so my question is more for the meth user. or someone who has recovered from this…what are the chances od a recovery? My boyfriend is divorced from his ex wife has 4 beautiful children. This man is very spiritual believes in God, he has the intentions to stop using but struggles and uses. when he uses he binges leaving for weeks and lately months at a time straying from me his now girlfriend. I do love him dearly and wish for him to be well. He is such a great man when he stays away from meth. I know i can leave him. but should i? this man is my best friend. should i just give up on someone even tho they want to get out of this addiction…he has no more family support, just me. he has no job no food to eat. he does still have a roof over his head and a car FOR NOW…but my questions are where does one like this go for help, if he is willing…what does rehab do? or is it just a waste of money. i realize that he needs to help himself but what are the steps I should take if i choose to help him…i know standing back and letting him fall is an option. but is there possible another way…?

When Nicholas Gianquitti moved to Daisy Court in 2005, he entered a model of quiet suburbia, where all the split-levels came with backyard fences and neat yards and children played in the cul-de-sac.
One problem: Gianquitti seemed at odds with the neighborhood children.
Their balls were always bouncing across his lush lawn or hitting his polished car.
Gianquitti complained about this last year to a friend from his old neighborhood, Oakwind Terrace.
The kids’ balls “were always banging his cars,” recalled Ron Silvestri of his conversation with Gianquitti. “They were brand new cars and he didn’t like his cars being ruined.”
Gianquitti, a slight man who drew a disability pension from the few months in the early 1990s when he served as a Providence police officer, complained to his neighbors on Daisy Court as well. And parents there and on the adjacent cul-de-sac, Lily Drive, warned their children to keep clear of the man with the tuft of orange hair sprouting from his chin.
On Sunday, Gianquitti’s next-door neighbors, James and Adriana Pagano, hosted a birthday party for their young son. Some kids were playing in the street and, neighbors say, Gianquitti, who is 40, came out yelling and swearing at them when a ball struck his car.
Pagano, 44, a Cranston firefighter for 15 years who had been officially promoted to lieutenant just last week, rushed over to confront Gianquitti.
The confrontation led to punches and then, with children and others watching, the scene turned surreal.
Witnesses reported hearing several shots and seeing Pagano, lying in the street, mortally wounded. Many of his neighbors and relatives began calling 911. The time was around 3:15 p.m.
Yesterday, while a District Court judge ordered Gianquitti held without bail on a charge of murder, police investigators probed the dirt and leaves blown against the sidewalk outside Gianquitti’s home at 16 Daisy Court, searching for evidence and trying to piece together a neighborhood killing.
Law enforcement officials say Gianquittihad been licensed to carry a concealed weapon since 1993 when he left the Providence police force after six months after suffering a knee injury.
Police confiscated several rifles and pistols from his home following the shooting.
McGrath said some of the gunshots may have been fired from inside Gianquitti’s house and others from outside.
Pagano grew up in the Garden City section of Cranston and graduated from Providence College in 1989. After college, he served as an aide in former Cranston Mayor Michael A. Traficante’s office before joining the Fire Department in February 1991. He was promoted to lieutenant in January, taking part in a department-wide promotions ceremony just last week. Married to Adriana Pagano, a part-time hairdresser, he had a daughter and a son. He was an avid golfer and a big Red Sox fan, known for cooking veal and mushrooms at the fire station and laughing easily.
Sunday afternoon at Fire Station Three, where Pagano had worked for some 15 years before a recent promotion and transfer, Lt. Mike Procopio and Firefighter Ray Giguere heard the call of a man shot on Daisy Court and sped to the scene.
They did not know, yet, it was their friend. But they were concerned.
“We knew it was his street,” Procopio said, in an interview at the station yesterday.
Gianquitti, married with a teenage daughter, had retreated to inside his house by the time the police arrived. And with reports of an armed man inside, officers initially cordoned off the street, with even the paramedics restricted to the perimeter.
Police took Gianquitti from the scene without incident, the chief said, along with his wife and his daughter.
McGrath said the department has 15 officers from the detective division working on the case, including three from the Bureau of Criminal Investigation, which is examining forensic evidence from the crime scene.
In May 2006, Gianquitti filed a formal complaint with the Cranston police of kids in the neighborhood playing with hardballs.
He wanted to get it on record, the chief said, in case there was damage to his property at some point.
Sorry I shortened the article to post it on here. I think this guy should get sentenced to prision for life. It is just awful how he reacted and they haven’t stated but I don’t even think his car had any damage even if it did that is no reason to take someone’s life.

it seems as though the LEGAL system in this Country has changed drastically…. I thought it was you are innocent until proven GUILTY but not here where I live in the USA It seems as though I am having to prove I’m innocent and they are deeming me GUILTY over FALSE accusations by DSS and they aren’t even my KIDS!!!!!
My Fiance who I’ve been with for over 2 years now he does have some minor charges against him and his record doesn’t look good but that is only because his EX wife and the mother of his three youngest children is on METH and had the kids taken away from her by DSS now she is saying for the first time in the courts not having anything but cooperation out of her EX husband with transporting the children is now saying that she was mentally abused and physically abused and the courts seem to side with the mother who has a record of her own for shooting a drug dealer in the head twice and going off on her DRUG induced binges all throughout the children’s lives
what else can We do I know we need a lawyer but can’t really afford one as my Fiance is on disability and I have a full time job just basically to meet the bills and have a life outside of this court mess….. My name has now been placed on an affidavit stating that I beat the children when I have never touched these kids in a mean manner… ( they are not mine, not my responsibility to take care of them, discipline wise )
If there is a lawyer out there please answer my question and give me some input on what we can do next. it looks really bad but if you look at the facts then it should be an open closed case against her and her LIES she has told the courts

thanks in advanced

1)The hyacints and daffodis in the garden were blooming beautifully, untill a freakish spring storm blasted their growth. Within hours, they shriveled up, and lay flat on the ground.
2) During last week’s heated town meeting, several municipial officials urged the town council to adopt a controversial zoning ordinance, a proposal that already been rejected by he town residents.
3) strategically placed pine trees concealed the junkyard from nearby residents, who otherwise would have protested its presence in the neighborhood, well known for its lush lawns and colorful gardens.
4) In an effort to cover his bald spot, all combs long strands of hair over the top of his head. Unfortunately, no one is fooled by his strategy. Especially not his wife, who wishes her husband would accept the fact that he’s getting older.

I just found out that my boyfriend of almost two years has been cheating on me with his ex lover. I found out by accident when his yahoo messenger popped up on our computer. I am baffled. I have done nothing but love this man and he is the love of my life. We have both been married before and technically he still is which is why we’re not (his ex wont sign papers) We have a brand new baby boy together and I found out he was trying to hook up with her just days after he was born and while I was pregnant. There is no emotional connection between the two just a sexual one. To make matters worse she is 52! I am 29 and he is almost 28. Can you imagine how I feel?! I read all of their emails and the words just keep playing over and over in my head. I am afraid that it will never go away and how can I trust him not to do it again. He says that he’s been trying to tell me for a long time and nothing has happened in a few months which has been verified by email dates. He says he doesn’t know why he did it that I’ve done nothing wrong and I couldn’t have done anything differently. He was cheated on by his ex wife a couple of times and he is forever hurt by this. After they seperated he went on one of those wild binges with girls and then we met. We both have children from our previous marriages and he went from being a wild man to being settled down with three kids and one on the way. Quite a change but still no reason to cheat in my eyes. But, I love him soooo much. He makes me feel like Ive never been in love before him. I don’t know how I would survive happily without him. I would cry more than I do now thinking about him cheating. What should I do? How can I get on with it (its only been two days)? What guidelines should I set so he doesnt think he’s getting away with something? Please help me….I’m desperate and I can’t tell my family because I don’t want them to hate him.

Manorbier in summertime

Perched high above a peaceful beach,
With splendid views across the coast,
Come visit Manorbier with me,
A castle haunted by old ghosts.
Baronial home of Norman style,
It’s stood the test against all gales,
A treasured gem in Pembrokeshire,
Much loved by Gerald, son of Wales.

The masonry of limestone built,
Crafted by twelfth century hands,
Its turrets, towers, round and square
Though aged and wind-worn upright stand.
With strong and crenelated walls,
Unspoiled by Medieval gloom,
No savage blows by evil foes,
Have turned this place to silent tomb

A quiet solitude pervades,
It captures mood of years gone by.
The chapel and the gatehouse near
And inner ward has view of sky.
On cloudless days this spread of blue
Can fall to greet a sparkling sea,
And from the heights your eyes can roam,
To cast themselves on lush country.

The laid out borders edge the green,
Bedecked in glorious summer bloom,
The colour lifts the whole display,
And air is filled with sweet perfume.
I’ve stood and felt enchanted here,
Looked back to times of toil and strife,
Heard pluck of strings on soulful harp
And mused on being Baron’s wife.
Danny, thanks for the link to the photograph
Mike, your link is also wonderful, in particular all the images of the inner garden. Wonderful place. Thought you might know it, you spending time in Pembrokeshire

I have been married for nearly 6 years now. I am very unhappy! I believe in my heart that my husband has a drinking problem. He lies to me and his mother, sisters, etc about his drinking. I know when he has been drinking because his behavior changes dramatically, yet he denies it. I guess he thinks that he is putting one over on me or something? Naturally he gets very defensive when I try to talk calmly to him about it, it’s just impossible! There have been MANY occasions over the years where he has left our home alone to go out and “cool off” and has been gone all night drinking! He has gotten arrested for public intox once before. I can’t even tell you how many times he has come home from one of his drinking binges only to argue with me and than pass out in bed until noon or one the next day. When he wakes up he either doesn’t remember anything, or refuses to talk about it! His mothers, sisters etc……are getting fed up also and are starting to see exactly what I have been dealing with for nearly 7 years now. Fortunately we do not have any children and in all honesty, I refuse to have kids with someone who drinks! That is NOT the way I would want my kids to have to grow up. I am starting to feel like by constantly accepting his apologies, that I have basically let him think that his drinking is acceptable. I KNOW I don’t make him drink, but he sure does try to blame me sometimes. There have been a couple of incidents where he has really lost his temper and either hit a door or wall or gotten a little physical with me (twice in 7 years). He curses and yells at me when he is drunk and now he is even starting to do it to me in front of my in-laws! I really don’t want to be married to him anymore. I have to get my financial ducks in a row before I can leave. This is not meant to sound shallow, but I put my whole life with him as an Army wife first, and neglected to establish a career or get an education for myself. BIG mistake!!! I really need some solid advice here. This is not an easy situation! Should I stick it out and encourage him to go to AA or get out now? This is really a sad thing, because I know my marriage is on the brink of ending.
By the way, I am 36 years old, and feel like my life is just passing me by and that I am wasting my time!

Bought with a Price

Slipping quietly out of the door, Kelly O’Byrne immediately felt the cool breeze on her face. Though the sun had already risen, a chilly mist still hung in the air, making the atmosphere feel damp and cold. Walking a little ways along the grassy green hills, Kelly listened for any sounds in the early morning, but all was peaceful and still. After a while, she came upon a steep hillside which she then proceeded to climb. Slightly tall for her fourteen years, this was not a difficult task for her. Finally, she reached her destination – a small cliff leaning out over the Irish Sea. It had become her favorite spot; she never grew weary of gazing dreamily out to the waters. Sitting down on the soft grass, she smoothed her dress, and brushed her long, black hair back out of her face. Her swirly deep blue eyes very much resembled the Irish Sea that she loved to gaze at. Though she loved dreaming about other distant lands, she was perfectly satisfied to remain in her hometown of Bray, where she had grown up. Who wouldn’t? How could anyone not love its rolling green hills, enormous mountains, and misty valleys? Who could grow tired of its lush green forests or beautiful rivers that stretched across the land? In Kelly’s mind, it was heaven on earth.
Far down below, a dog barked. Glancing down, Kelly saw the people of Bray beginning to wake up and get to work. Still, she remained where she was, watching the waves gently lap against one another, crashing against the shore. Startled, Kelly looked up, and stared out in the distance. Squinting her eyes, she looked harder. Still unable to distinguish just what it was that she was looking at, she tried once again, to look past the mist. Suddenly, she saw it: The serpent-like head protruding from the narrow ship. Vikings!
Fear immediately struck Kelly’s heart. For a few seconds, she stood frozen on the cliff unsure of what to do. Finally what her brain was saying to her legs registered and she began to run. Jumping down the steep cliffs, she slipped cutting her leg on a sharp rock. She ignored the pain – her only thought was to warn the people of Bray. Terrified, she ran on. Swiftly, she jumped over the steep cliffs, and ran down the dangerous slopes. Slipping and falling numerous times, she pushed on. Fear defined her eyes as she continued to sprint down the mountain.
As she ran, Kelly thought about the last Viking raid. She did not remember – she was only four. But she heard stories from the older villagers, about how the Vikings had stolen from the people, taken a few captives, and even burned down some of the buildings. They had tried to burn the monastery, causing an excessive amount of damage. Over the years, it was repaired, but still, on one side, you could run your fingers over the wall and feel the burnt wood. The people of Bray were terrified after that, so they worked together to build a safe-house in case it would ever happen again. Everyone dreaded the day when the bells of the monastery would ring signaling danger.
Slipping again, Kelly forced herself to calm down. Finally reaching the bottom of the mountain, she raced across the green hills toward her home. She burst in the doorway to find her mother cooking breakfast over the stove, and her father telling the younger children a story at the kitchen table. She exclaimed, “Father, Vikings! I saw the ship coming from the North!” The peaceful atmosphere was immediately broken.
Mrs. O’Byrne turned pale, and Clara, the youngest of the family, began to cry. The twins, Thomas and Daniel, looked at one another with scared faces. Mr. O’Byrne quickly rose from his seat. Without questioning his daughter further he turned to his wife and said, “Grab some food! Everybody must get to the safe-house!”
Turning to Kelly, he ordered, “Quick, run to the monastery! Tell them to ring the bells! Warn anybody that you see along the way, and hurry back to the safe-house – we’ll meet you there.”
Quick to do her father’s bidding, she began to run to the monastery. Along the way, she shouted to the people, “Quick, get to the safe-house! Vikings! Hurry!”
The looks of puzzlement turned to alarm when they heard the word “Vikings” and they rushed to find their children and run to the safe-house. In a matter of minutes, the whole village was in uproar. Fear was etched in every face, as parents searched for their children, and fathers helped their families into the safe-house on the edge of the village. Continuing to run, Kelly shouted, “The bells! Ring the bells!” But even as she ran up to the monastery, the great bells had already begun to chime.
Kelly stopped, and turned beginning to run for the safe-house. Suddenly feeling very tired and dizzy, Kelly stopped running. Looking around, she saw no one. Telling herself to push on to get to the safe-house, she began to

This is too long, so apologies in advance.

Basically, six years ago, I developed a crush on someone I worked with. It was pretty innocent at the the beginning. About three months into my “crush”, however, it started getting pretty intense. I never told my crush about my feelings, and I never acted on it. We were friends, joked around a bit, and had a similar sense of humor, but that was it. I worked with him for a year, and he never gave any indication of being interested in me beyond friendship, either. Near the end of the year, I found out he had recently gotten engaged.

At that point, my relatively innocent emotions veered off into crazy town, and seemed to lock in on the conviction that he was the only man for me. For the following year (though we were no longer working together, and I never saw him), I thought about him constantly.

Eventually, it was as if one part of my mind was content to obsess over him 24/7, while the rational, adult part of my mind remained mystified as to the intensity of my attachment, and tried valiantly, with limited success, to keep me gainfully employed and in the real world. I never tried to physically stay in contact with him. Rather, it started and has stayed all in my head.

It has now been five years since I last saw him, and though I have kept a relatively “even keel” mentally, I still occasionally (about twice a year) go on what I can only call “fantasy binges”, where I think about him constantly for a two week period, and feel little reason to stop myself. For the rest of the year, it’s kind of on the back burner, but its always there.

The worst part is, I have been in a relationship with a kind, intelligent, extremely compassionate man, for the last three years, and my crush is happily married. I have been rational enough to make sure my crush and I don’t cross paths (we live in two different parts of the same city), so that I don’t do anything stupid enough to jeopardize anyone’s happiness.

I was recently diagnosed with a low-spectrum bipolar disorder, which may or may not be related. Even though I know this obsession is not real, that it doesn’t spring from any kind of real relationship, and that my boyfriend and I are much more compatible than my crush and I ever would have been, it still holds on persistently. At this point, I’m getting scared, both for my mental state and for the relationship I have with my boyfriend.

If anyone has an idea of how to pursue a “cure” for this, exercises, or anything else that might work, it would be very much appreciated. Obviously, I don’t want to hurt my crush or his wife, but it is really my boyfriend and our relationship that I’m worried about most now. Thank you for your time.

Drifted slowly bobbying up and down in his surivial swimming posistion, he was face down in the water. Only moements ago was he on his own ship the Rosemary. He was taking the daughter of filthy rich mayer of Boca Roton. He had married her and was transportng her and there 3 year old child to a farther away estate, which he had just bought. Risqué, the merchant, was a traveling merchant who would sell things and make importnants of spices and other things of that sort. He would typically drop by Boca Raton to sell his small stock, common day herbs and wines, sometimes to children things like chocolate and toys. Everyday he went there he stayed there four days. Maybe it was true love at first sight or maybe she just met his standards, but in every other town he only stayed two days. He hardly got to talk to her because she always had a couple of the mayers men watching her. One day she got fed up and ran away and found him by the docks, so she had noticed him too, she requested to leave with him, but he knew he would be wanted if he did that. So he dragged her back to the Mayer and took in the insults from her. The Mayer thanked him and invited him over for dinner.
And so now he was married with her. She relized she did want to escape her father but did not relize Risqué knew this and knew he would get on the good side of the mayer and be able to be forgiven by her. So things worked out well.
If someone did not know better they might think Rique was drift wood if he did not sometimes lift his head and took a big breath from his deep sleep. Only a momments ago was he with Maria his son aboard the Rosemary. Only a moment ago was he on a pirate ship, witnessing the death of his son, and destruction of Rosemary. Everything he owned was on that ship and when the knife was unsealthed all the love given to that boy was spilt. He had men with him on Rosemary but they died too. His wife was not killed, for he knew that she would be used for a ransom. The Mayer would do anything to get her back. Aparently he was worth nothing, the slick Pirate captain missing half of his teeth and dark of face figured, so he was thown over boar for the sharks.
He was starting to get his energy back, but was not srong enough to get back on the hunk of Rosemary that was left, that he rode as far out as he did. He was also not the least bit angry at the Pirate, how could he? He was too tired. He thought he saw the pirate in a wanted add, Wanted Dead: Stede Smith (They did not bother to write “Or alive” as they mostly don’t do)
Nearly given up all hope he wasgoing to let go a dn drown to the depts below. As he sunk further down away from the wicked sun he saw something, somehow, thorugh the water that stung his eyes. His hand grabed for it, and it held steady. He slowly was drifting vertically rather than falling down. Slowly he picked up speed on whatever he held and than he broke from the top of the water. He could not believe it, as he drew his breath as he did when he was floating. He was riding a Dolphin!
Being carried by that dolphin which was picking up speed he slowly was losing his tiredness and picking up anger. Occasualy his fingers would strain to hold on to the dolphin but he understood as his fingers did that this creature of god was his only way out of here. Strangely he questioned whether this Porpoise was of Gods work, it was traveling way to fast for him to hold on, its head rocked left and right trying to shake him free, it seemed, and it traveled towards the sunlight which blinded Risqué. He had been bought to an island.
The shore was extremely white and led to the lush forest that he believed could have been paradise if he had not seen the pile of corpses burning in the camp fire of the beach. There were crates filled with rum and grog, spices and seasoning and bananas all smashed on the rocks washing on shore. There was nothing to say for the ship except of what remained of it torn apart across the white sand like crumbs on a noble’s silver plate. The ship had crashed on rocks and than had been killed off and burned by someone, most lily Stede.
The Dolphin was still coming to shore at full speed. It than did what no other dolphin Risqué heard ever did, came out of the water. Risqué used to see his dad catch small fish and sometimes they would fall out of the line of the hook and onto the floor. When they would do that they would move up and down, left and right in unconrtolabl spasms like a person, who could not swim, struggle in water, the dolphin was no different.
Reaching out to led a hand to roll it back ino the water, the dolphin snapped at it and almost bit it too. Its black body was still slick and wet, its eyes were blazing, Risqué thought he saw red. He desided to leave the poor beast to its fate and check out the crash sight when he remembered whee he would be right now, rotting down in the depths of the ocean along with the dead whales. So he r