How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Archive for September 2nd, 2010

I just don’t get it, am i missing something? is religion not the cause of %95 of bloodshed in the middle east?

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http://www.theonion.com/content/node/51849

JERUSALEM—As an uneasy truce between Israel and Hezbollah continues, millions of average men and women in the Holy Land are turning to the one simple comfort that has always seen them through the darkest days of their troubled history: the steadfast guidance of their religious faith.

“I take solace in knowing that my faith is a sanctuary, an escape from the bloodshed and turmoil,” said Haifa resident Yigal Taheri, who last week lost his wife and newborn daughter
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am i missing something? is religion insanity i.e. doing the same thing over and over expecting different results?

My H has been an alcoholic for years. He has had past history of dv with ex wife and ex gf. This weekend we got in a fight in the car, we had both been drinking, I was driving. He faked like he was calling the cops and had a whole conversation while a police car w/ lights on came down the hill after he got off the phone. I swung open handed and hit his chin, he swung closed fist and hit me in my glasses which cut open the bridge of my nose. I took off and left that night, but I came back the next morning. He said he would give me a divorce and leave if I wanted. He said he deeply regreted everything that happened, but I shouldn’t have hit him, because then I was instigating the violence. I think he was wrong for pretending to call the police.

He has a tendancy to binge drink on the weekend and most of my friends don’t want to be around him. Which leaves his buddies that do drink constantly. We have a 2 yr old son and I have an 8 yr old dtr. I do love him.
But I am not sure if he really can change like he says he wants to. I told him next time we are done. But should I go to anger management or some sort of counseling? We have been together for 3 years, he is also bipolar and stopped taking his meds two months ago. He says he wants to change but then he does the same thing every weekend. I told him we both need to be accountable to each other to not drink and talk to each other better. What next?
I am not an alcoholic and am not making excuses for myself, I would not have even mentioned anything about me doing anything wrong if I was… My kids were taken care of at the babysitters, they didn’t see anything.
Hey teacherintheroom I had 2 beers he had 10 he was doing his typical emotional phsychological crap… Sorry that you have never been in that position before. I am 29 I do not drink all the time, if I have 3 drinks in a weekend thats a lot.

I like to think I tried very very hard. However it wasn’t enough. I am not going to sit here and tell you I am perfect because I am not, the main reason she left me was because on average, once or twice a year I would get so intoxicated I didn’t know what I was doing and ended up pushing/shoving her around. I never slap her or beat her per say, however it is still just as bad. Why I would do something like this to someone I love so much, ?? I know I will never ever touch another bottle of Liquor as long as I live and God as my witness. She has only been gone two days now and the pain is killing me. I have custody of my children from a previous marriage and I feel like a Zombie around them. I just need someone to confide in, something to just make it by. I think there may still be hope for our marriage, however at this point I wonder if she deserves better and I should just grin and bare it for her sake. I know not what to do, Only that I have made the biggest mistake of my life and will never recover from it.
Thank you all for your kind words of wisdom. It does all sound easy. There are alot of other women in this world, yes, but she is my soulmate. She is the nicest person I have ever met in my life. She has never had a bad word to say about anyone. She is truly “one in a million”. Which is why I think she probably deserves better than I. Oh, I know very well what I did, and do realize what alcohol has cost me. No, I will never be influenced by that again. I don’t drink all the time, just socially, couple of times a month. She has been in and out of the hospital for months and months and I have always been right by her side, even though members of her own family never show up as promised. I worry more about her health than anything else. She does love me, I know, however I think the medication she is on is affecting her state of mind on a regular basis as her moods have grown more and more sporadic. Sorry for going on and on…Helps to let it out.. I miss her so. She won’t return my calls.
I just got back from taking my kids to the movies. I could not do anything but think about where she was, what she was doing, If she was thinking of me at all?
All the while smiling and nodding trying to hide my true feelings. Don’t know how much longer I can keep it together. I’ve got a constant knot in my stomach, Managed to force down a few handfuls of popcorn tonight…I’m self employed, and have not been to open my store in two days and I do not even have a care to check the voicemails….How on earth can anything hurt this bad…Please tell me there is a magic pill that can make this all go away….

When I am not home she comes in with her son to snoop around(she once lived in the home)If I am not in the living room when she arrives she goes back to his bedroom following his father.I didn’t realize this was going on except I would come home at lunchtime and find our bedroom door locked on the days she was to come pickup him up. She finds excuses to come into the home.I had enough,so I called her and told her that when she comes inside my home she stays in the foyer. She got beligerent.This woman has tried suicide 4 x since I have known her and 8 x total. She admitted that she did it for attention,the last time she scratched her wrists. I have only been in her home twice and both times was to get the son out of the home because her 3rd husband and her were drinking and fighting.She is getting married again without divorcing the 3rd husband,she has an alcoholic and pill problem.I love the son as my own and he knows it. What should I do in the future?

…cause you might be dreaming?
Here is one from my life… see if you can top it.

My bro-in-law has a bad Opiate addiction. Oxycodone. But also mixes in Morphine some times. He has lost everything good in his life… jobs, wives, kids, homes, cars, belongings, health, friendships, etc. We helped him into detox and rehab a few times… to no avail. He robs and steals and makes a living selling other people’s stuff. He keeps chasing the high and buying and selling drugs and working with corrupt doctors to sell prescriptions for them. He recently moved to another state to get away from his life here in Virginia. He moved in with his mother and looking for a job.

Here is where I pinch myself:

He calls me… he has applied for a job at ADT (the alarm system company). He wants me to give him a reference. I refuse.

He gets the job anyway and calls me back, “How long do I have to be off Opiates to pass a drug test?”

I said, “What kind of test?”

“The hair test.”

“Shave yourself bald.”