How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Archive for July 20th, 2010

Hit another vehicle with a family of 5. ( They also have no car insurance) No drunk driving. Son has no job and is married with 3 children. No money in bank. ( Lost his job. Job went to China) No home. ( They rent) They are on welfare. His wife is not working. Her job went to Mexico. So who pays for the 300,000 dollar medical bills? The hospital wants money. They have none.

Man over monkey: UW researcher Dr. Paul Kaufman
If you talk with Paul Kaufman about animals for any length of time, sooner or later he’s going to tell you about his turtle. He mentioned it in a meeting with animal rights activists early this year, and again at a campus debate in March on the ethics of using primates in research.

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Lawyer says Lohan staying at substance abuse facility
LOS ANGELES Lindsay Lohan has moved to a substance abuse facility and signed legal papers hiring celebrity lawyer Robert Shapiro to represent her as she prepares to head to jail for violating probation in a 2007 drug case.

Read more on Fort Wayne Journal Gazette

She is at the e.r. now. They won’t let him see her. They won’t tell him what’s going on. What are his rights? Yes he’s been drinking, but he is able to be calm and comprehend. Can’t he do anything?
btw- she fell on a curb while they were walking home from a club. so none of this was his fault for those who are wondering.
She is not unconscious. But she hit her head bad enough she doesn’t even know what day it is.
Thank you for the great answers everyone. I am on the phone telling him to stay calm. He is just having a really hard time. This happened downtown at a club so there were witnesses and he has nothing to worry about. But I feel bad for him.

Ive been going through a ruff patch this year… probably the worst year of my life. I was at a party in February & got pulled over driving home and got a DWI & lost my drivers license for 6 months. During the period that I couldn’t drive, I found out my wife was having an affair & we got a divorce (I was more upset that I couldn’t see my son every day).

So all of the time that I sat alone at my house & not being able to drive, I done what most severely depressed people do: drink. My neighbors are alcoholics and since I really needed someone to talk to during my divorce & since I couldn’t drive, I spent alot of time hanging out with them drinking. Now Im worried Im becoming an alcoholic; if I get stressed, pissed, or depressed… I just want to drink & not just one or two or three. I checked into AA in my area but there isn’t one since I live in such a small town.

What steps can I take to help me deal with my problems without turning to alcohol. I also have my son for a full week every other week so I refuse to drink then, but it seems like its getting harder to say no. Can anyone give me some advice?

Remember I live in a small town so there is no AA or support groups of anykind.

If so: would an online series of free audio mp3′s and books/articles for download be of some help, or is there enough “stuff” on the web already?

This is a “sore subject” with many family members and spouses, so please let me explain further:

I am a recovering alcoholic (sober 5 years). Before that, I put my family through “heck” (that’s not the word I want to use, but there’s this “community guidelines” thing Yahoo has…).

I am lucky to still have my family and life. Period.

I am a strong believer in the 12 step method and AA.

I was just wondering if there is anyone who would want something “positive” to help you or your family.

AA and counseling deal with the addiction.

What I can offer (ok: my wife has a lot to contribute as well…), is the same advice I’ve learned over the years about the other part: getting your life back.

A lot of “AA’ers” tell you: “Your life won’t be the same – get used to it.”

There’s some truth to that: there are marriage breakups AFTER the spouse gets sober: the person changes.

I am very thankful to MANY people who helped me change… for the better! Not “get used to it”, but “get over it.” Back into a better life than it was before. Links to their work, teachings and advice, all on one site, would have benefited me. Perhaps I can “give back” to just maybe help someone else.

Or, is there just so much “junk” out there on the web, no one would see or care?

Recently, my wife has gone in a tv series binge, watching nearly every episode of Desperate Housewives, Sex and the city and Nip Tuck. I don’t know why she did (maybe it’s her stupid friends again…) but know she always wear an all sweater outfit, that is pink, and proceeds to hang in the house all day long drinking and bragging about her life being far from what she expected. She wants to move to beverly hills (in no way possible I can afford that) and wants to live like a supermodel and actually wants to change career for modeling. She’s 46 years old and overweight. Every time she takes the dog for a walk she yells at the neighbors and tell them their nothing and useless pieces of s*** and that they should kill themselves. What should I do? I’m pretty near from slicing my wrists. Please help me.

Yes or no? Explain your answer as well.

In my opinion most of them set bad examples to younger people by cheating on their wives, drink driving..etc.. So I don’t think they are role models at all.

I’m a wife and mother who has found myself overwhelmed by my alcohol use. What started out as something to relax or calm my nerves over the stresses of marriage, work etc has multiplied into a problem. Now I am drinking every single day, earlier sometimes too. I also smoke cigarettes and run off to the bar because I don’t want to drink or smoke around my daughter.

I need some words of encouragement because it feels like i’m not strong enough to stop this cycle. I am wasting money, like $200 a month on my drinking/cigarette habits. I want to stop but when the stress starts, it seems it’s the only release I have.

HELP!
OK. Those quotes didn’t really help me with my problem but thanks, it is interesting. I’m not only talking about Christianity, but believers of God, in general.

I already know this was stupid. So dont Flame me. I was pi$$ed and afterwards thought about how stupid it was, but
I slashed 2 tires on a guys truck that I had an affair with just out of spite (he lied to my husband when he confronted him about the affair). I’m on probation for a DWI from last year. It was dark, I turned off my lights, and did it. Then I went back later to wipe down the tires to make sure I didn’t have fingerprints on it. I didn’t see anyone and I don’t think anyone saw me. If they did…they don’t know me. If he called the cops to report it , would it be proof that I did it because he knows what kind of car I drive and what I look like? Incase someone did see it and say ‘ it was a blonde with a blue car’. Is that evidence since they don’t know me?

I haven’t talked to him in 6 months, He’s going through a divorced and I’ve called him saying it was his wife and hang up when he answers. So I’m hoping he thinks it her. But what could happen and is there proof?

Robert Shapiro to represent Lindsay Lohan
Celebrity lawyer Robert Shapiro said Friday he had agreed to represent Lindsay Lohan, who is headed to jail next week for violating probation in a 2007 drug case.

Read more on Los Angeles Daily News

EuroTrash Monday!
Schleck Still On Top Andy Schleck is still in yellow at the Tour but can he take it all the way to Paris? Yesterday’s poker playing on the final climb with Contador was a clear statement that he is watching just one man in the field this year, Contador.

Read more on PezCycling News

Lawyer: Lindsay Lohan staying at substance abuse facility
Lindsay Lohan has moved to a substance abuse facility and signed legal papers hiring celebrity lawyer Robert Shapiro to represent her as she prepares to head to jail for violating probation in a 2007 drug case.

Read more on GMA News

My brother and his wife, and my husband and I have a business together. We recently decided that my brother and his family will move into my home to share in the expenses, so we can invest money into the business. Tonight however, my husband and brother were working at the business together, and when my husband came home, I could tell that he was intoxicated. When my husband drinks, I am immediately on edge. I immediately panic because he is an alcoholic. I called my brother and said, “Please do not drink with him, do not offer him a beer, because he is not nice to me when he comes home drunk. I would appreciate it, if you would not drink with an alcoholic.”
My brother’s response was “shut the fuck up” and then he hung up on me. He called me back once again, and told me to keep my marital problems to myself. My brother is supposed to move in this weekend. I am assuming that he won’t anymore. My husband is mad at me, my brother is mad at me. What do I do now?
Just to clarify, my husband does not beat me, he gets loud, and easily agitated. And he was going to AA religiously until the last 4 months, since the business picked up.
My brother has plenty of problems of his own, and is lives his life with a “machismo” that has put his own marriage on the rocks. He has so much pride, that I know he will not want to talk to me about tonight, and will just stop talking to me. I was not blaming him, but I expect him to have courtesy for my husband who struggles with alcohol every day. I do expect my husband to respect me and my husband enough not to offer or bring it around him. I do expect my brother to make good choices. I expect my husband to take responsibility. I am not blaming my brother. I expect him to help, not contribute to the problem.

Since the time our mother died (11-2006) I have helped my brother with bills,school supplies for his 2 kids. Then his wife dies so he sends them to me to live with (“till he gets himself together”) they were seperated for 7 yrs. So I get them on death benefits then he decides he wants them back (3 months later I get them again this time I go to S.S. office and get checks sent to me.) I have 3 of my own 1 with ADHD and 1 nephew from husbands brother. Now my brother’s son also has ADHD but is more aggressive. So my nerves couln’t take all 7 kids so they went to different Aunts on thier mothers side well my brother was still getting checks but has not had kids for 5 months now the kids are getting them and brother is having fits.Now he was in jail 1 month ago for PI, I usually get him out (happens alot,PI or DWI) but this time I said no!Then he messed with our dad (used him for money) He is under investigation with SS. I have no brother anymore. Its all about him. Am I right or wrong?

to work. I have to drag him outta bed and rush him to get ready, and if im late for work he docks me an hour pay and expects me to work late and make up a full hour when i was only 5 or 10 mins late. I need the job, it pays very well, what do I tell him?
the boss and his wife has some dirt on me, i did something wrong and they have it covered up
its a private, family owned business, I am the only one thats not part of their family that they trust, my job pays very well but sometimes they take advantage of me, I stay cause someday they might give me part ownership of this business

A friend’s ex-wife who neglects her children(they are often dirty when they return from their mother and have emotional problems) is leaves for Missouri next month. She tried to kill herself less than two years ago and binge drank alcohol when she was pregnant with the youngest child-a concealed pregnancy for which she sought no medical attention and alerted nobody she was pregnant. I wonder about the emotional stability here.
Oh, and the concealed pregnancy was while her husband was stationed at Ft. Stewart and deployed in Iraq. He was very embarrassed to his commanding officers and pulled out of a class one day and told his wife was going into labor.
Her Dad wasn’t really in her life. Interesting.
She also used to physically abuse her husband and squandered his entire income and money sent by her Mom-in law when her husband was deployed.
That’s a good point.

BACKGROUND: My S.O. and I have been together for 3 years. He has a son that is almost 8 y/o. When my S.O. was with his (second) ex-wife, she ran over and killed a man while drunk driving and under the influence of drugs. She truly got away with murder by spending 30 days in jail and 10 years of probation along with drug/alcohol treatment. She was later put back in jail for another DWI and possession of drugs. During this time she was playing the role of Mommy to my S.O.’s son. He was 3-6 years old. She had told Anthony (the son) that police are mean. She told him they hit her and only fed her bread while she was in jail for “speeding”. Not sure how much he truly comprehended of that but he now fully believes police are mean and does repeat what she had told him about being hit and not being fed. The birth mother is not in the picture and we don’t know where she is. He hasn’t seen her since he was taken away from her at one year of age. I didn’t know any of these people until later.
PROBLEM: We have caught this child stealing three times. Yesterday he stole a pack of gum while at the airport. We were in a shop buying HIM a snack. The cashier and I didn’t even see the kid take the gum and he was standing on the side of me. I noticed it hours later when the gum slid out of his pocket. He is also a firebug. He tried catching the stairs on fire while everyone was sleeping during the night.
I am seriously thinking of backing out of this mess. I have NO experience with any of this stuff!
QUESTION: Does his father take him to the local police and have the sh*t scared out of him about breaking laws and going to jail? We are paranoid that what he was told in the past will be confirmed in the childs mind about police being mean rather than here to protect the innocent. At the same time, something needs to be done with this child. He is headed down a very dark road if he doesn’t change.
ADVICE??????????
BTW- this child shows no sign of anger. We have brought him to physicians, school counselor and two professionals and they just say he isn’t ADD or ADHD, he “chooses his actions” and needs to learn right from wrong. Because of his age, they say there isn’t a program available for him. We live in Florida.

Hawthorne, police blotter, July 15
On June 25 at 3:35 p.m., a Realtor for a Barbour Street property reported the theft of copper tubing from the premises on June 25 at 3:35 p.m. Entry to the home was made through an unlocked basement door. The owner, who was out of state, was notified by police. Police are investigating.

Read more on The Record and Herald News

Obituary: Dr. Jerome Lackner helped addicts
Dr. Jerome A. Lackner, a physician and social activist who served as state health director under former Gov. Jerry Brown, died Friday of congestive heart failure, according to an announcement by the state Department of Health Services. He was 83.

Read more on The Sacramento Bee