How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Archive for June, 2010

My wife suffers from depression, Alcoholism, and is bi-polar. She hasn’t been eating right, has been in bed the last three days. Before that she was drinking, staying up 22 hours a day, and doing all kinds of things. Breaking things, picking fights so forth.

I have called her Doctor two times, and begged him to call me and let me know what my options are.

What is his responsibility to me, and my wife? Shouldn’t he be returning my call, to at the least let me know what my options are?

What is his responsibility to my wife’s care? He has been informed one of his patients is headed down a destructive path?

Is it not his job to get up off his fat lazy (rear end) and help us? Why did we pay him all that money?
She refuses to go to the Hospital or to see her Doctor.

I know Doctor’s have several patients to see, but can’t they have someone in there office call, or someone in authority who can help people?

Should the wife of a man that killed a 5th grade boy and his little brother who was in kindergarten due to drunk driving donate money to the bank where the victim’s family has a donation account to pay for funeral costs for both kids.

My wife of three years has left again for the same guy.
The sad part is that the blow becomes easier and easier, the number I become after scar upon scar. I’m not saying I’ve been the perfect husband– maybe I missed some lines here and there, but I do not believe there is anything I could have done to warrent this completely. I have not been perfect, but I have been faithful. Our soon-to-be 3-year-old precious son is now in the middle of this. The last time she ran off (a year ago), while hiding my son from me with her boyfriend for five months (six months the first time), she had been arrested for DWI, hit and run, spdg ovr 100mph and child endangerment. I found out after my own investigation that son was in their custody and that my wife was in jail and she lied to them as to my whereabouts while the boyfriend did the same so that they could keep him for themselves. I forgave her once. Now she calls tonightand wants to talk. Logic knows better– heart doesn’t. What do I do?

One of my uncles called to inform me that his wife has been admitted to rehab for alcoholism. She had a son from a previous marriage who committed suicide years before she met my uncle. Her loss led to her drinking problem. She hasn’t been able to stop grieving primarily because she doesn’t know if he asked for forgiveness or if God has forgiven him regardless.

I am pro-life and against the death penalty, but I have mixed feelings about this. What do you think?

Thanks

I have been divorced for a year from my alcoholic ex-wife. The reason for the divorce was because of her drinking and total disrespect for me. She was mean and nasty. I left her and from what I hear from my son (he’s 20 and still lives with her) her drinking has gotten worse. Yesterday she was drunk (in the a.m.!) fell and split her lip. My son drove her to the hospital and got it stitched up. But now she can’t remember that ever happening! Though we’re not together, I feel she may do something worse and hurt herself worse, i.e. drinking and driving. But I have gone on with my life. Should I be concerned about her?

Should I keep using her as my designated driver?

SCIENTISTS are hard at work to try to find genetic causes for alcoholism, homosexuality, promiscuity, violence, other aberrant behavior, and even for death itself. Would it not be a relief to find that we are not responsible for our actions but are merely victims of biology? It is human nature to blame someone or something else for our errors.

If the genes are to blame, scientists hold out the possibility of changing them, eliminating undesirable traits through genetic engineering. The recent success in mapping the entire human genome has given such aspirations new impetus.

This scenario, however, is based on the premise that our genetic endowment is, indeed, the villain responsible for all our sins and errors. Have the scientific detectives found enough evidence to make a case against our genes? Obviously, the answer will profoundly affect how we see ourselves and our future. Before examining the evidence, though, a look at mankind’s origin will prove enlightening.

How It All Started–
Were Adam and Eve predisposed to sin by some defect in their genes?
Most people are familiar with, or at least have heard of, the account about the fall of the first human pair, Adam and Eve, in the garden of Eden. Were they made with some intrinsic defect in the genes right from the start, a sort of design flaw that predisposed them to sin and disobedience?

Their Creator, Jehovah God, whose works are all perfect, proclaimed that his crowning earthly creation was “very good.” (Genesis 1:31; Deuteronomy 32:4) As further evidence of his satisfaction with his work, he gave the first couple his blessing and instructed them to be fruitful, to fill the earth with human creatures, and to take charge of his earthly creation—hardly the actions of someone uncertain of his handiwork.—Genesis 1:28.

Regarding the creation of the first human pair, the Bible tells us: “God proceeded to create the man in his image, in God’s image he created him; male and female he created them.” (Genesis 1:27) This does not mean that humans were made to resemble God in physical appearance, for “God is a Spirit.” (John 4:24) Rather, it means that human creatures were endowed with godly qualities and a sense of morality, a conscience. (Romans 2:14, 15) They were also free moral agents, capable of weighing a matter and deciding on the action to take.

However, our first parents were not left without guidelines. Rather, they were warned of the consequences of wrongdoing. (Genesis 2:17) So the evidence indicates that when Adam was faced with a moral decision, he chose to do what to him seemed expedient or advantageous at the time. He followed his wife in her wrongdoing instead of considering his relationship with his Creator or the long-term effects of his action. He also tried later to shift the blame to Jehovah, saying that the wife He had provided misled him.—Genesis 3:6, 12; 1 Timothy 2:14.

God’s response to the sin of Adam and Eve is revealing. He did not try to correct some ‘design flaw’ in their genes. Rather, he carried out what he told them would be the consequences of their actions, which led to their eventual death. (Genesis 3:17-19) This early history sheds much light on the nature of human behavior.*

Should each person accept responsibility for his decisions?

my ex wife is diagnosed borderline personality disorder with major depression. she had an abortion, a DWi and is really screwed up. I just want to make sure if you’re from this area, don’t go see her even though she comes across as very caring. don’t put your kids in harms way. if you need her name and are from this area, let me know so you don’t get screwed.

My step daughters dad was released from jail about six months ago following a 3 year sentence for violation of probation and felony refusal (he was acquited of his eigth DUI since he wasn’t caught in the act. He completed a 28 day program for alcoholism and my wife and I can’t prove that he is drinking again or driving illegally (he has been caught driving drunk with her before). He bought a truck and had it put in his new girlfriends name who he moved in with after just four days of knowing each other. His girlfriend can’t be said to be a bad person since our feelings about her are not to be proven. His GF use to be one of my wifes friends and in fact was with my wife when she met my step daughters dad. She is also 18 years older than my step daughters dad. My wife and I feel that this relationship is unhealthy for my stepdaugter to be around because of the age difference and the fact that my step daughter knows the GF as my wifes friend. My step daughters dad is court ordered to pay child support but hasn’t paid for 4 months and he doesn’t have steady income. My wife and i googled the dads name and we found that he had been released from jail pending charges no more than two months ago. My wife confirmed what we had found by calling the county jail. My wife talked to him recetly and he mentioned that he had been talking with an attorney and that when he had the money he would be taking us to court for custody whether it be physical or legal i don’t know.

My wife and i have good steady jobs and i have known my step daughter for five years (since she was 3). I know the difference between legal and physical custody and am less worried about him being granted physical custody. We don’t want my step daughter to be emotionally damaged by being involved with a relationship that we see as unhealthy and don’t want her hurt if he were to choose to drive drunk with her again.

What are the chances of the father being granted custody/visitation?Please help us settle our nerves!!!!

My ex-wife and i have a four year old daughter together. When she left our daughter was one and a half. She took our daughter with her at first, but brought her back after two weeks because ‘she couldn’t handle it.’

Over a period of about six months I tried letting my daughter have a relationship with her mother. At first we lived six hours apart so i would drop her off with her mother and plan to pick her up again in a month. Each time she would bring her back after about a week or two because, once again ‘she couldn’t handle it.’ After a few months she moved closer, so she was only an hour and a half away. I would bring our daughter to see her about every other weekend but would later find out that the whole time my wife had her, our daughter was with a babysitter the whole time, and my wife had been out drinking.(This was the case when she lived farther away too) Whenever I would call to check on her, my wife would sound wasted. I would hear from mutual friends and see on myspace that the whole time she was supposed to be spending time with our daughter, she was out at the bars and sleeping around instead. She didn’t deny it. Sometimes she would just not show up when it was her time to come get our daughter.

Also during this time she was using my car which i gave her money to make payments and buy gas so she could come visit and drive our daughter places. But of course she used the money for something else (going out to the bars) and i had to make the payments again myself.

Finally I told her that if she wanted to see our daughter, she would have to prove to me that she could handle it and would be responsible. I told her if she called every day for one month to check on our daughter i would let her see her again. She stopped calling after a few days.

Over the past two years she has called sporadically to tell me that her dog died, or to wish my family a merry Christmas, usually not even mentioning our daughter. She did call once after about a year to ask if her father could come visit our daughter, but i said no since she didn’t even know who he was, and because he had never bothered to see her before.

Our daughter now has no idea who her mother is, because she hasn’t seen her since before her second birthday.

When we were divorced my ex-wife didn’t show up to the custody hearing, and later signed a paper saying that i would have full custody, and she would be able to visit occasionally when we both agreed on it. She was supposed to be paying child support but hasn’t paid a penny.

My ex-wife is now pregnant with another child (mutual friends have told me she didn’t want to get pregnant in the first place, and that she is working at a bar, still going out to the bars drinking non-alcoholic beer so it looks like she is still partying, and didn’t tell anyone she was pregnant until really late into her pregnancy)and is suing me for FULL custody of our daughter. She is claiming that i violated our parenting plan by never letting her see our daughter and by not telling her when we moved into a new house. The only time she asked to see her was after she found out she was pregnant and i said no because she hadn’t called to talk to our daughter or asked to see her in two years, and our daughter doesn’t even know who she is. Everything in the papers she sent is complete LIES, saying that i never let her see our daughter and that she has been trying to. I have about seven character witnesses lined up to testify against her. They are all mutual friends, or her friends who she has screwed over. My brother, who must have been a reference or something, has gotten numerous phone calls from debt collectors and even the police a couple times looking for her.

We have met with our lawyers, and our lawyers have recently met with the judge to determine if she will throw the case out, or if she wants to take it to court. I have been waiting a week and haven’t heard anything. What are her chances of her actually winning full custody, or any custody at all? Our daughter doesn’t even know who she is.

I live in the state of Montana and my ex husband lives in Washington state. Four years ago we had a court battle over two children (twins) now both age 10 years. Anyway, he got residential custody and I only got summer time and holidays which adds up to nothing. He won because he had more money as neither of us are unfit. Now things have changed. He is remarried and does not allow me to meet his wife although he has met my husband many times. I don’t know this stranger who is watching my children along with her three kids. Also, he just recently got a DWI and sat 2 weeks in jail, and is getting in all kinds of trouble with the law as far as traffic and all. Also he has a warrant for his arrest here in Montana for failure to appear on a misdemeanor harrasment charge. Is there any way possible for me to re-gain residential custody without the high cost of a lawyer? I really need some good advice. Thank you. The kids live mostly in Washington and here in Montana in the summer.
His new wife is running from her ex husband who lives in Ohio and just got out of prison for sexual battery to her and my children have told me that her kids are afraid that thier dad will find them and kill them. Yes, I beleive this woman is a danger to my children if this is going on. Thank you for the help.
esquireinquire:
The reason only one of us got residential custody is because the children are in school and had to stay in one state and not be moved during the school year. The children were in the state of Montana until their father wanted a visit and I agreed to let him take them to Washington to visit, as I use to live there with him while we were married. (BIG MISTAKE) I never knew he would stoop so low as to take me to court and lie that the kids lived with him. Well, court was held in Washington and I am not rich, and he had more money than me and a male judge. He won the residential. I do have 2 sons and daughters who have always lived with me and my oldest 2 children are adults now and my other 3 are teenagers who also live with me. I was married twice, so no one was considered unfit. If he lived in Montana we would have both gotten Joint custody like we had to begin with.
Arthur W:
Can I go to a paralegal in the state of Montana in front of a Montana judge or do I have to go to Washington and do this? The court order is a Washington court order, but I would like to just do it all here in Montana if possible. Thank you for your help.

since the start of the year i have noticed it about 4 times. last night when she turned up at my house she was in a terrible state. I’m surprised she managed to get into the car never mind drive all the way to my house. we are getting married in august and i don’t want to ruin that but shes going to end up killing someone.
of course i don’t want to get her in trouble but she has made so many promises not to do it again and has broken it every time.

what should i do ?
i haven’t had any yet but i wont be driving.

My older brother and I are in a war of words.
He says I have ruined my life because I didn’t go to college when I was young, and I now have a low paying job, and because for many years I smoked pot (I quit a few years ago), and because I got fired friom a good job 4 years ago.
I, though, remind him that he once lost his job, house, and wife because of his alcoholism, that he has never held a job for more than a couple of years, and that he has cheated on every wife he has been married to, including getting a married woman pregnant while he was married to wife #3.
And, although he was sober for years, he is drinking again.
I may be an ex-pothead under achiever, but I never cheated on my wife.
So, who is the bigger loser? My brother or me?

well my lover is a widow with 3 children and we recently got a little more serious,{things were very good and spent most of her free time together}.She has the children in mind when she questions my motives.I am getting a divorce left a great job, and have taken the last 2 1/2 months off to fix the house and get it sold….december was very tough for me{the house had so many memories……..WELL my girl and I got into a tiff she doesn’t seem to think I have the work ethic/good enough job to support her/kids…also I’m in 2 courts with my ex-wife and got my 2nd DWI AND could face jail…..I got drunk and walked into her apartment and she threw me out and called her brother the tropper….she doesn’t take my calls so I sent her roses…..and I guess she was excited to get them based on what the flower man said….but its only 2nd day she hasn’t called. I love her more than my wife of 17 years…..I know sounds crazy…..the last 8 months I have really had my hands FULL WHAT DO YOU THINK?

Regarding his face, and how his wife left him, and his alcoholism/depression. Im just wondering if I missed an explanation or if its just not been really said yet. Also, whats your favorite character and storyline this season??

We have not been “intimate” since than. It’s always something, why she can’t or wont. I am trying to be understanding and patient, I do love and care about my wife but I am very tempted to hook up, “sex only” no strings attached, with a female in my same situation. I feel rejected, and hurt, and I just miss the human touch…what to do?
and yes I have tried talking to her about it, she just gets angry….

my wife got her first dwi here in arkansas the other day. when the cop came up he said he could smell alchol before he got to the car but there were 4 of us and she just got home from shopping and only had 1 maybe 1 1/2 beers he made her get out and do 3 test the 1 st he said she failed cause her eyes were red but she been up since 3 am shopping 2nd she failed the standing on 1 foot for 30secs but shes had 3 ankel surgerys on both ankels 3rd the breathalizer they said she passed but they said they thought it was messed up so they took her for more testing,then they walked up to our car and asked her freind (which had drinking since 12 pm and it was 10pm)if she could drive she said yes so with no test they let her drive but said we would have to get a sobber adult to bail her out . when she got to jail she tried to refuse the 2nd breathlizer but they said if she did they would carry her to the hospital and get a blood test she blew .09 should i get att. how much our they ussaly

Married for 10+ years. Spouse developed alcoholism, quit regular job, & for the last couple of years, spends most of his day either sleeping, or drinking at the computer in chat rooms (mostly with gay priests) & generally has been unsupportive of me (emotionally, financially, physically, sexually). I’ve asked in the past for him to seek help for his drinking, & told him of my needs/desires, & mostly he changes for a couple weeks, & then slides back after he feels the heat is off. I’m tired of this. He claims he loves me, but I think he loves having a wife paying 85% of the bills, keeping house, providing health insurance, etc. I told him 1 month ago that’s it, & he wants yet another chance, & for the month, he’s stopped drinking & picking up after himself. I told him I can’t say I love him anymore, & I don’t want a marriage of convenience. He wants to keep trying, but I feel I don’t want to try anymore – I’ve been jerked around enough. How many chances is “fair”?

A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over and asks, “Where have you been?”
“I’ve been to the pub,” slurs the drunk.

“Well,” says the cop, “it looks like you’ve had quite a few.”

“I did alright,” the drunk says with a smile.

“Did you know,” says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms, “that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?”

“Oh, thank heavens,” sighs the drunk. “For a minute there, I thought I’d gone deaf.”

11. Dick Cheny’s first DWI
10. George W. Bush’s DWI
9. Barbara Bush, minor in possesion of alcohol
8. Jenna Bush, minor in possesion of alcohol (3 times)
7. Dick Cheney’s second DWI
6. Laura Bush’s vehicular homicide, record expunged
5 George W. Bush’s arrest for larceny (stealing a Christmas tree, really!)
4. Jeb’s 24 year old daughter Noelle arrested for fraud at 1:15 am Walgreen’s drive-thru in attempt to obtain prescription drugs.
3. Jeb’s son George arrested for breaking into girlfriend’s home and malicious destruction of property
2. Jeb’s othe son John (Jebby) arrested for violating Florida sodomy law in a mall parking lot during days after 2000 election
1. Jeb’s wife for smuggling undeclared purchases into the United States (fined thousands)

Bonus:

1. Dick Cheny’s third DWi
2. Whatever earned George W. Bush a one year sentence of community service in Houston.
3. Neil Bush fined for his “ethical disability” taxpayers cost 1 billion dollars, Cost to Bush $0.
As a matter of fact, this info is from www.toostupidtobepresident.com Of course you Bush lovers would denounce anything that belittles your favorite moron.
Fisha; check out some of these sophmoric responses from the “Bushies”
Also, Dick Cheney drinking alcohol, going hunting with his Republican pal, and shooting him in the face.
Squizzle Squerk, You just don’t want to see the truth, do you?