How Do I Get My Wife Off Drugs?

Archive for January 6th, 2010

Does the idea make you uncomfortable, make you laugh, make you say you want to meet one? Or does it make you wish for the capacity to have an emotionally intimate relationship, not dozens of superficial ones? Or perhaps you are concerned for the children and teenagers in your life, that they not become victims of sex crimes; or that they (or you) not become victims of someone unable to commit to and sustain a relationship, or spend their lives wondering why they cannot have a healthy relationship. No question, the term, “sex addict” definitely provokes something in all of us.

Like other addictions, sex addiction is a way to cover or change feelings. It is a substitute for dealing effectively with life. Non addicts or addicts truly in recovery are able to have healthy relationships, sexual and non sexual. Sex addicts often destroy their primary relationship by going elsewhere to pursue their addiction. They cannot relate normally as they are always looking for more or different. Really they are searching for something external, anything, a substance or a process, to “fix” them. An addict is simply NOT OK in his or her own skin.

Example: it is common for addicts to use pornography, especially computer porn or movies. The man who is involved in computer porn, or tuning in to “Adult Films” regularly, is not available for emotional intimacy with his primary sexual partner… he spends time and energy focused on the porn, not on his wife or girlfriend. He can use his addiction to isolate and avoid being vulnerable. He, and she, misses the benefits of an honest and emotionally present relationship. The computer has become his lover; he is having an affair, just as much as if he were involved with another woman.

Other destructive examples of sex addiction include the men and women who have multiple affairs with multiple partners, never feeling close to any of them. The addict is desperately lonely and yet unable to let anyone into his life; he is not able to allow anyone to really know him, living with a deep seated fear that he will be rejected or hurt. Everything and everyone is sexualized. Every trip to the gym is an opportunity to wear provocative clothing and covertly solicit. Every encounter with a member of the opposite sex is either overtly or covertly flirtatious. The “vibes” sent out by the sex addict are clearly detectable by anyone looking; they scream loud and clear, “I am available,” “want to be with me,” “let’s have sex,” and so on. After the initial rush, the gnawing loneliness returns.

Addicts can switch addictions easily , so it is not uncommon for an alcoholic to begin to use food, gambling, or sex, instead of, or in addition to alcohol. Sex addicts are attracted to each other like magnets. The progression of this disease, if left untreated, can be to sex crimes, including exposure and assault. The addiction will escalate as the need for the “drug” (sex) increases. There are treatment centers that specialize in the treatment of sex addicts, and many books on the disease and recovery. To read more about Sex Addiction, begin with Patrick Carnes, Out of the Shadows.

Recovery from this addiction allows the person to become available for other things in life, most importantly, for a relationship not contaminated by the dishonesty and shame of affairs, porn, or other behavior that takes away from closeness to one partner. Here’s a test: are you doing anything you would not want your family (grandmother, children, and wife) to know about? Recovery is possible. It is not necessary to switch addictions from a substance or process to another substance or process; rather, it is possible to recover from the entire disease (dis-ease) of addiction, to be free to choose your own behavior, to not be bound by compulsions and obsessions.

My wife is always willing to drive me to the tavern. Should I invite her in and buy her a beer?

My hubby walks up and announces that his friend is going to stay with us for a while cuz he got kicked out of his other friend’s house for playing peeping tom on her when she was in the shower.I can’t understand why he coddles this lush.He drinks all day,doesn’t work and doesn’t care.What the hell am I supposed to do to get rid of him?

 

Overview of Triage Therapeutic Approach

 

         The Triage Method of Emotional Therapy (TMET) is supported by clinical experiences during a 24-month pilot program titled, Operation Recovery. The method is influenced by empirical findings from recent neuroscientific research and considered an on-the-ground application of the Hakomi Method of Body/Centered Psychotherapy.

         In a pilot program titled Operation Recovery, TMET proved effective when applied in a contained, open-air garden/woodshop environment. While engaged in physical activities and social interactions, participants were able to:

        (a) develop the trust required for an effective therapeutic alliance

        (b) experience a sense of self-control by initiating their own therapeutic process

        (c) learn to self-regulate physical and psychological function through         education and experiential training

        (d) gain trust in their capacity to acknowledge and tolerate their own feelings,

             emotions and thoughts

        (e) learn to engage and control their own physical and mental defensive systems

             in real time.

 

      With survival as the genetic dictate, organic systems of the body regulate energy and effort in relation to efficiency and effectiveness. Affective Neuroscience, a book authored by Jaak Panksepp, describes how threats to survival, labeled traumatic experiences, activate survival mechanisms in the primitive brain, which increase affect, a pre-emotion neuroprocess, for the primary purpose of stimulating physical movement.

     As threats to survival increase, the Primitive Base Brain becomes the Supreme Command Center (SCC) and instinctually elevates the production of motivational affect to influence other neuro-centers. Greatly increased affect results in an overload for the Central Nervous System (CNS) and a decreased capacity in higher brain function – emotion, cognition, language, attention and memory.

     All three of these neuro-centers are systematically integrated during:

        (a) the integration of sensory input with motor output

        (b) the regulation of physiological arousal

        (c) the capacity to communicate experience in words.

     However, only the SCC has the capacity to selectively control the process. Its supreme control is dictated by genetic survival structures.

      Continuing SCC arousal with a decrease in CNS function – combined with limitations in memory and attention, produces a virtual experience of being lost in space and time. This produces the out of body experience during moments of trauma and may explain the Marine feeling like they are still in Iraq, when they are with family at home.

     Until the SCC is convinced the threat is over it will continue its potential to control with or without reminders or triggers of the original threat. Variations in reactions to trauma and in the persistence of control by the SCC are related to the particular structure of each individual’s genetic coding for survival – suggesting relationship to resiliency.

     Additional research published by Rauch/Van Der Kolk, Hull, and Lindauer supports Panksepp’s work on how threats of survival motivate increased affect in the SCC as a means of generating physical action, while decreasing the higher brain’s capacity to regulate affect – to slow or stop action in threat’s presence.

     These researchers have all pointed out that popular therapies, which seek to medicate or modulate the higher brain functions of emotion, cognition and language, may find their methods inefficient and/or ineffective in treating trauma. As Van Der Kolk points out, higher brain chemistry and emotions are activated in order to bring about action. They are not what “is” motivating the activation. In addition, experience in Triage suggests that some of the actions being motivated may be designed to hide and protect the motivator!

         The SCC is not easily convinced that threat is over. When missing the experience of a return to safety or through physical damage, the SCC appears to be mandated to continue generating affect, which stimulates the chaotic thoughts, intense emotions and irrelevant behavior of PTSD. The SCC is not designed to simply trust the CNS and higher brain functions to make decisions on issues of survival. It is designed to resist and distract any deviation from its dictate to survive. Only by the experience of knowing the threat is over will this system lower its guard and allow the other neuro-centers the opportunity to regulate peace of mind.

     Continuing symptoms are evidence that the SCC is actively sorting for safety and not finding it. During psychotherapy treatments where the focus of support was on SCC processes, a decrease in affective tones has been documented using Quantitative Electroencephalography (QEEG). Certain popular treatments may prove more than ineffective if studies were to find a rise in affect during symptom treatment.

     Van Der Kolk concludes, that effective trauma treatment needs to involve (a) creating a safe, controlled environment where trust and the therapeutic alliance can develop organically, (b) learning to tolerate feelings and sensations by increasing the capacity to mindfully observe and track one’s own inner experience, (c) learning to regulate one’s own affect and the resulting emotions, thoughts and actions, (d) learning to re-engage physical defenses and re-build collapsed or overwhelmed systems.

 

 

The Triage Method

       The Triage Method (TMET) is an on the ground adaptation of methods and principals of the Hakomi Method of Body/Centered Psychotherapy and neurologic system concepts supported by empirical findings of recent neuroscientific research. The Method has been refined over the last 15 years working with individuals exposed to mild to severe violence, who have lost trust and remain hyper vigilant to mental and physical invasion.

       During the last 24 months, working with Marines and their families the method did show very positive outcomes. A garden provided the safe environment to initiate therapeutic relationship in a non-clinical, non-diagnostic way. It provided a space where Marines and families could rest, turn their attention inward and notice their unique organic process.

         Triage principals honor the fact that living organisms were created to ensure selfish longevity and purpose. The best hope for both is that the organism’s design includes a systematic electrical/chemical system at its core – one, which can self-direct communication between all possible participants in its survival, from its simplest gene to its complex social environment. The supreme goal of this selfish system is to maintain an efficient and effective balance – of all things relevant to self-survival, within limits defined by a Window of Tolerance.

       The practice of Triage in the garden involves noticing any activity threatening to take a participant outside their Window-of-Tolerance. This means noticing any subtle thing that disrupts the participant’s present state of balance and theoretically becomes a threat to their survival. Once noticed, choices are made about what to do about the perceived threat.

       For example: In broad strokes, too long under water, not enough oxygen tips the balance and causes survival systems to ratchet down efficiency (stop thinking and emoting and swim like a fish to the surface), regain balance and survive. Here, noticing someone is drowning – we take action and throw out a preserver. We don’t shout to them the fact that they are drowning.

         Prolonged exposure to threat of immediate death and constant surveillance with sleep deprivation provides information that the Supreme Command Center (SCC) must take over and dictate the survival effort. Thinking stops. Emotions cease. Information from the SCC is standard operational procedure and the first line of motivation for muscle and body organs. Here, noticing someone is sleepless – we help them notice the process they may be using to block sleep. We don’t throw them a pillow and turn down the lights.

       As long as the affective signals of communication from the SCC continue to prevail other neuro-centers generating emotions, thoughts and ideas will struggle to compete, to regain their stature. This struggle heightens the potential for an individual to feel disordered and malfunctioned. The choice here is, do we join in the struggle or do we support the SCC until it can self-integrate into present real time?

       In a more specific example: An active duty Marine with two tours of Iraq returned to a church group for Marines struggling with PTSD and TBI. He hadn’t looked at me or said anything to me, the visitor, until he suddenly turned and started telling me his traumatic story of war. He persisted, deepening as he went. The church counselor attempted to interrupt by commenting, “Gosh, you haven’t told me any of this stuff before.” He never took his eyes off mine. Never blinked.

     When he was done I simply said, “Damn, I wish that hadn’t happened to you. Seems like you had a lot of responsibility” (the story was laced with gestures of responsibility and distrust for superiors). I used the word responsibility because it seemed to be a core theme in “Who” this Marine was.        In theory, to be responsible was a core process of his SCC. As we begin to explore the possibilities of the theory, our connection abruptly ended. He pulled back saying, “I had chores like everyone else when I was a kid.”

     That was it. He turned back to the group. To check, I asked if he wanted to continue. Without looking at me and with assurance he said, “No!” We had arrived at a Window of Tolerance, too close to a vulnerable operating system the base brain SCC utilized to define his World. Responsibleness defined him. It was a core filter he automatically used to efficiently regulate his World. He was using it before the war. He used it during the war. And, he was now using it to define how he carried the war experience. Responsibleness was both motivating his PTSD associated rage (They weren’t/aren’t responsible and I am) and limiting his resolve (It’s all mine to bear).

     At the end of the meeting, he again turned and said in a voice of authority, “I want to come visit you at the garden on Friday. I need to build a bed frame.” Two days later he visited the garden/woodshop and built a bed frame. We didn’t return to the earlier conversation about his combat experience. We stayed in the present moment. He let me assume and direct some of the responsibility for making the bed frame sturdy. I applied my idea of Gorilla Glue and dowels, while he sanded and stained.

     His agreeing to let me assume some responsibility may have been a test. However, it felt like a shift in his perception of threat, where he was assessing threat to Who he was with present time experience. In theory, his SCC experienced safety, turned down affect allowing trust to develop, when responsibleness was recognized, supported and given time to rest.

     The example demonstrates an aspect of the therapeutic process involved in the resolution of Operational Stress, PTSD and other general distractions from efficient and effective regulation of the life experience. The SCC, especially when activated for frequent and prolonged durations, remains hyper-vigilant and active dictating when and how other neuro-centers get to contribute.

     Intellectually, the Marine in the last example may or may not have understood what had been revealed, but somehow he deduced when it was time to stop and how to allow himself to reorient. Research from Damasio, Ledox, Panksepp, Porges, Llinas and Davidson has shown that the internal process he may have used is automatic and systematic. Its function is to stabilize the life-experience by maintaining a predictable environment within a Window of Tolerance.

     For this Marine, exploring the intimate structure of responsibility in his life-experience was unfamiliar and thus unpredictable territory, posing too much risk. Staying with what I had noticed about the motivating core structure was the quickest way to demonstrate predictability. It by-passed all the negotiating involved in the emotional and cognitive neurostructures.

     A Marine puffed-up with power cannot risk knowing or exposing a vulnerability his SCC is mandated to protect through puffing. John Wayne and General Patton are historic examples.

         Read Montague, director of the Human Neuroimaging Lab at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston, recently published studies on how the brain codes for predictability as a vital resource and generates social interaction based on rewarding predictable experience. The more predictable life-experiences are, the less effort required to maintain the Window of Tolerance and the less risk to survival.

      Fortunately, as the intimate processes of the SCC, which frame the life-experience, become more familiar they become more predictable, making them the most efficient systems to engage for the reduction and resolution of stress and disorder. Triage encourages participants to become familiar with their own inner, neuroprocesses. Once core impulses are experienced as predictable they become tolerable and manageable. Talking, planning and medicating can be supportive to this process. However, The Triage Method guides participants to self-discover their own intimate core processes, which support self-directed integration of their life-experience, as a means of empowering self-discipline and control.

        A Marine who struggles to make sense of two extreme feeling states, the serene, calm feeling he has outside the wire in Iraq and the irrational, chaotic thoughts and emotions he has at home with his wife and children, may be experiencing distortions in space and time and the effects of his brain sorting for predictability. Outside the wire surprise and uncertainty are predictable and expected. At home nothing feels predictable. Over time a Marine and family can sort out who makes breakfast and when, and who will drive. They may even quickly reconnect intimacy, but the overriding question of who will live to return can’t be predicted. The impermanence of life affects predictability.

       That question looms as unanswerable, yet the answer is vital to calm the impulse to predict. Without the answer nothing is predictable in the family structure because all things depend on continuance. For civilians the question rarely impedes on their life-experience, rarely leads to hanging themselves out of hopelessness. PTSD and Operational Stress make it a real and threatening situation for Marines, as with the late Marine Sgt. Boyd “Chip” Wicks, 2004.

     The Triage Method offers the potential to overcome and decompress these systematic, base brain operational procedures. By directing attention to where, when and which system is activated and or overwhelmed in any particular moment participants begin the process of turning their attention inward. This is the mindfulness of Triage, noticing and tracking inner neuro-processes in action. This is the primary and most critical job for achieving self-directed self-discipline and self-regulation.

     Once operational procedures are noticed they become known and are the general framework for behavioral development and change. Without appreciation for the potential of systems – especially core mechanisms related to survival, a change in life-experience is inefficient and takes great effort.

     The result of inefficient effort is usually circular violence within these systems and throughout the individual’s family and social system. Response to this violence is often labeled denial, resistance, bone headedness and/or just Who they are, creating stigma for the individual and hazard for the culture and it’s ethos.

     In the previous example, the church counselor seemed to feel left out regarding information pertaining to the Marine’s traumatic war experience. Her not noticing the system motivating the experience represents violence. The interaction could have been experienced as threatening to the SCC if her desire to connect appeared self-focused. By not noticing the motivator in the war story, driven by emotions and thought, she was not truly supporting the Marine’s supreme dictate to stay within a Window-of-Tolerance.

     The expressions of the SCC, those systematic or instinctual base brain directives, can be noticed in physical structure as well as behavior. Core systems that hold the behavioral codes for survival appear to utilize those codes as blueprints to mobilize a body in support. Ron Kurtz and his associates at the Hakomi Institute have spent 30 years utilizing reference to eight generalized physical or character expressions they contend develop in relation to nurtured experiences.

 

       These postures illustrate the core neuro-blueprints expressing physical tendencies to Withdraw – Collapse – Rely on Self – Charm, Manipulate – Expand Power – Take on Burden – Distract by Doing and Up the Struggle.

       In developing The Triage Method, correlations have been researched showing relationships between Kurtz’s eight physical character expressions and behaviors described by Panksepp’s core neuromechanisms, Keirsey’s innate temperament types and Bowlby’s attachment styles.

       This is an area offering significant potential for understanding Marine behavior in relation to Marine ethos, the codes of war and expression of behavior associated with stress, especially PTSD. Behaviorist may have been duped by the self-fulfilling prophesy of the SCC. Based on the theory utilized in Triage, the parent/caregiver didn’t just reject the baby causing it to develop a tendency to withdraw. The baby came organized, at least in part, to reject the caregiver.

      Research coming from the field of Genetic Biology is clearly showing that at least 50% of human behavior is genetically directed. If we accept this data, then we must begin to consider the possibility those same genetic codes have influence on the physical structure expected to back up the behavior. A baby born with a frail, alien body may be predisposed to support its own SCC directives to withdraw and carefully regulate energy before any possibility to feel rejected. Genetic directive to express a power attitude, born into a frail body, would be ill matched to survive the generations.

       Triage treats these character types as physical expressions of neuro-blueprints organized by the same SCC codes that dictate behavior. While aspects of these characters appear to be evident in everyone and usually remain relatively fluid, they do deepen and become more pronounced in relation to increased stress load.

         Functionally, Marines can learn to utilize Hakomi’s eight character types to predict generalized behavior for themselves, their fellow Marines and their adversaries. An individual who has a tendency to stay withdrawn from the social environment usually has an underlying and continuous sense of feeling not welcome. They will also have a supportive body structure, one that is thin, unstructured and undefined – unnoticeable.

       An individual with a tendency to withdraw may become a Marine but leave duty disappointed in not getting what they were hoping for from Marine ethos. The tendency to withdraw or be responsible plays a vital role in the experience of trauma and expression of PTSD. The Marine expressing responsibleness had unique physical resemblance to the illustrated Take-on-Burden character.

    Triage maintains its potential when both physical and behavioral expressions are noticed at the point of initial contact. It builds trust and produces a great amount of efficiency. Trust and respect happens at a feeling level and it is allowed to deepen in an organic way without effort, reducing tension, stress and ultimately risk.

     Marines who learn to utilize The Triage Method have tremendous potential to mentor fellow Marines at home and during deployment – increasing Marine ethos, reducing Operational Stress and Risk, reducing dependence on medication and supporting intelligent career choices rather than automatic or emotional ones.

     It makes no sense that a Marine can return from Iraq, after a rocket slammed into his armored vehicle, killing three of his team members and burning him, has to spend five years struggling to make sense of and control the persistent impulse to kill/destroy himself and others. In a particular situation, who was in imminent danger was depending on his level of hopelessness and rage.

     The most difficult aspect of this Marines struggle was that because of his injuries, he had spent most of his post-traumatic days in therapy of one form or another. When we met he seemed relatively relaxed – for what appeared to be a Marine coping with a heightened use of the “Withdrawn” neurological character style.  However, once he began to trust me – after an all day fishing trip off the coast of San Diego, we explored what he called his consistent “just under the surface” suicidal / homicidal rage.

     The alarming aspect was that – in all the years of therapy, he had never been asked to notice his own inner experience of rage, notice the layers of how he organized the associated emotions or that, indeed his rage had complex associations to memory, meaning, and automatic impulses. This is simply wrong and beyond comprehension!

 

The Triage Perspective

 

New information offers the potential to adapt our ways of viewing,

managing and treating Operational Stress and PTSD.

 

      The garden environment and its many activities are unquestionably grounding and therapeutic. However, the proposed Common Ground therapeutic garden’s potential and effectiveness is enhanced with therapeutic principals and methods currently successful in Operation Recovery’s Garden Program in Oceanside, CA. The Triage Method of Emotional Therapy (TMET) frames the relational principals and methods utilized. TMET is an adaptation of The Hakomi Method of Body-Centered Psychotherapy, where awareness is always related to and from a loving, heart-centered perspective – one of acceptance and respect.

      The Triage Method is a relational method, which utilizes an attunement to existing temperament, attachment and intrapersonal neuro-radiance theories, and empiric neurological findings.

 

Key mentors include:

Dr. Jaak Panksepp

            Distinguished Research Professor Emeritus of Psychobiology at Bowling      Green State University (Primal Neuro-Mechanisms motivating behavior).

 

Dr. Stephen W. Porges

            Professor of Psychiatry and Co-director of the Brain Body Center at the        University of Illinois at Chicago (The Polyvagal Neuro-system Theory).

 

Dr. Bessel A. Van Der Kolk

            Clinical Implications of Neuroscience Research in PTSD, New York            Academy of     Sciences, 1071: 277-293 (2006). Boston University School of Medicine, The Trauma Center, Brookline, MA.

 

Dr. Marco Iacoboni

            Neuroscientist at David Geffen School of Medicine, UCLA, Los Angeles.

            Pioneer in brain imaging studies of the human mirror neuron system.

 

      Of primary importance in Triage is Dr. Jaak Panksepp’s Affective Neuroscience. His research is deeply rooted in psychophysiology and behavioral biology – including behavioral genetics. His work offers the conclusion that survival mechanisms or core neuroprocesses, based in the primitive neuro-structures of the human body, generate affective expression or primitive affect from the Basal Ganglia, the reptilian “old school” area of the brain.

     Dr. Panksepp’s research suggests these mechanisms have ultimate control over the body’s physical affective expression because they potentially frame all behavior with genetic dictation. And that stress, especially extreme stress of combat and long-deployment, activates these survival mechanisms in extreme ways.

     Fear, anger, panic, and to seek have been empirically identified as the primary core processes by Dr. Panksepp’s research and that of others. It appears that the symptoms of PTSD are motivated by at least one of these four core neuroprocesses. Triage often reveals PTSD symptoms to be a complicated blend of two or more.

     The supreme dictate of survival is the incentive for these core processes to be inherently continuous, systematic and efficient. They represent the body’s core organizational structure, which Panksepp suggests, provides the information motivating other brain activity and ultimately behavior.

     This is one foundation for the relational and information gathering aspects of The Triage Method. By noticing which mechanism or combination of them a Marine is utilizing to manage experience in the moment, choices can be made to deconstruct the automatic structure of affect – offering the potential to experience a change in the behavioral outcome.

 

       With respect due Dr. Panksepp, it may be valuable to add  Justice as a 5th mechanism.  Justice, or “making things right” seems to innately permeate all cultures and is an especially obvious concern in trauma. Genetic neuroscientists may add a whole range of other innate mechanisms. However, these are the mechanisms supported with the greatest amount of research.

       My experience working with OIF/OEF veterans suggests that they (as we all do to different degrees and intensity) – in trying to regulate to their post-war environment, migrate between and within these five with greater intensity and with out much relief.  Unfortunately, relief is the antidote! And, successful relief comes – in part, by experientially understanding these mechanisms.

     In a very short mater of time, this Marine had – through his developing trust, began to notice and differentiate when he migrated through the various innate mechanisms described by Panksepp.  He did however, continue to struggle with the underlying tension of not understanding “Why!” – still not able to make sense of it. Until, I wrote the word justice on an old fishing lure carton and slipped it to him. He immediately said, “That’s it, that’s freeking it!”  I quietly, made an observation, “Pisses you off”, without emphasis or elicitation – as in a question. Triage is not about questioning. Instead it is about guiding awareness.

     He got quite and began to reflect on a lifetime of struggling with justice.  It was his dominate drive. It was what drove him to be a Marine. And, it was what was driving his rage.

     How was he going to make sense of how his team died and he was air lifted from duty moments before they were to roll towards Fallujah in 04’.  Or, that an immediate family member had become seriously ill while he was in recovery. Or that his girlfriend left him after repeated warnings about his abuse on her.  Where was the justice in all that had happened?

     It appeared that this decent – although shy (withdrawn), kid from middle America had had his natural bias (sensitivity) to justice amplified – not only by his experience in war, but by his post-war experiences.  And, as research suggests, once these impulsive mechanisms or neuro-systems are amplified during traumatic experience they remain amplified.  Having an opportunity to learn and experience his inner processes in relation to these systems offers an opening to regain control of their intensity and persistence.

     This Marine, in his final days of assignment to the Wounded Warrior Battalion West, finally found relief and an understanding. Word has it he is now a Marine veteran and ready to go fishing again – only this time in a different state of mind.

     In general, Panksepp concludes the core affect originating in the raw nerve structure of the body and brain-stem are used to stimulate the limbic area or mid-brain to regulate, regulate and adapt that affect as a means of surviving in a social context without neurologic overwhelm. This regulation process produces the felt sense of experience known as emotion. The more evolved outer layer of the brain, the neo-cortex, utilizes core affect and mid-brain emotion to generate cognitive function, declarative knowledge, reasoning and logical thought, which are advanced coping, managing and surviving processes utilized when risk is low.

     All parts of the brain initiate muscle action. However, the instinctual part has supreme control because it has genetic dictate with the ability to shut off or restrict higher brain function under extreme stress. Also, because it is integrated with all areas of the brain and environment the base brain’s creation of affective information is paramount in the creation of moment-by-moment behavior. It is always on-line.

     When the underlying processes influencing felt emotion and cognition are intensively activated, especially by extreme psychophysiological stress, their structure of influence may become disorganized demanding them to remain persistently on or off. This persistent override thwarts thoughtful emotional action and appears to be related to some of the disorders referred to in PTSD. Rage or panic affect, override emotional action. Freezing or taking flight limits the ability to seek. Understanding this process with the experience of self-regulating affect reduces the possibility of system overwhelm and allows emotions and thoughts to regain their status of control.

      Attention to the possibility that these systems may be exerting inappropriate influence is the primary focus for change provided by TMET.  As the affective signal from these mechanisms increases the body and brain experience increased stress, the more stress the closer to the Window of Tolerance the more survival impulses ignite.

      For example: A Marine with two Iraq tours was diagnosed with PTSD at discharge. His horrendous stories of combat were punctuated with hopelessness for a marriage and a desire to live. He had come to the garden seeking something. Turning attention to the seeking allowed its affect to settle (be regulated) and his whole coping system was discovered.

     In theory, separation from the Marines had created increased panic (Who am I now?), to cope with the intense panic affect his SCC directed an increase in rage affect (I’ll control this), which was mistakenly directed at a mush safer object, his wife. The shame of beating her (Who am I, a monster?) and her leaving him reignited the panic affect. To cope the SCC shut those affect motivators down and collapsed him with flight motivating affect. Here, without available rational thought or emotion, it manifested into a flight to suicide ideation.

      Once he had the opportunity to notice and feel this unique process loop in real time the overwhelming affect gave way to increased emotions and rational thought. He found a balance when risk declined and more systems were allowed to participate in his life-experience.

 

      Survival is assured by nerve circuits systematically informed, organized and motivated by 3-levels of brain function in direct relation to perceived degrees of risk.

 

Base-Brain     The Supreme Command Center, (SCC). The instinctual blueprint part uses a core neuro-blueprint to automatically seek/find, panic/connect, flight/freeze, fight/rage or be just/make sense as survival risk escalates. This area of the brain receives and regulates continuous affective information from the sensory systems of the body and filters them to the Mid-Brain and through some systems, directly to the Executive-Brain.

 

Mid-Brain      The regulating Mid-Brain defines and sets the stage for memory by utilizing Base-Brain’s affect to generate emotion as a means to communicate and cope in relationship – to self and social environment, in relation to associated risk.

 

Executive       The thinking, planning, learning (memory) and explaining part of the brain. Constructs concepts of reality from base affect and emotions utilizing thoughts and words to communicate, manipulate, cope and survive within an ultra low risk, stable environment.

 

 

      Affective, Biological and Anthropological Neuroscience all offer new understandings of how our nervous systems organize, express and resolve experience. They also honor that individual nervous systems and family and group relational systems organize in much the same way.

      Within these developments there is evidence supporting methods of prevention, mitigation and resolution of Operational Stress and PTSD. The Triage Method, as an on the ground application of the Hakomi Method, utilizes these developments with respect for the participant’s potential to heal themselves. Yoga, Meditation, EMDR, and Virtual Iraq seem to be affecting core neuroprocesses, only in a more externally directed way.

      Perhaps the most important finding relevant to the Marine is how the base brain’s neuro-mechanisms produce mental chaos through instinctual processes when internal impulses deviate from the code of a warrior. The dissonance between the way a Marine expects to respond and the actual real time reaction produces stress. This stress represents the emotional/mental disorder in the brain’s function and validates the SCC function.

      For example: A Marine, who initially knows he is a kind person and a Marine trained to act with morals and integrity in the act of war, may experience something in the line of duty that cannot be reconciled. Perhaps he turns toward incoming fire, trained to make fast decisions to reduce the threat, but momentarily freezes, not able to pull the trigger until it is too late. Or, he snipes a 12-year old at 300 yards. How does his brain make sense of the experience and the difference between instinct and training? Any lasting incongruence holds potential for stress and increased Operational Risk.

       Science seems to have the mechanism of this process in PTSD understood. It is a disorder in the primitive brain. When the Basel Ganglia’s generation of affective signals to higher brain function is startled into activation or activated for extended periods of time its instinctual structure is reorganized and remains vigilant though not necessarily ordered in its capacity. The Department of Defense’s funding to research experimental drugs this summer, designed to alter the chemical function of the base brain’s genetic dictate to freeze or flight, is based on these findings. It is an attempt to cure or limit the structure of PTSD development.

      An artificial adjustment to this process may have interesting ramifications because these neuro-mechanisms are motivated by genetic dictate for a reason. Survival. Seeking shelter, panicking during separation, raging at intrusion and freezing or flight from threat may serve Marines in combat even when they are trained to act otherwise.

      In another example: A pattern of SCC directed action was discovered when a Marine’s curiosity was aroused during a garden experience. He made the statement, “This is weird. I was just remembering a situation I don’t understand. I don’t think I was ever afraid, while it was happening, but I was doing some odd things.”

      As a Warrant Officer he was leading a crew outside the wire to gather concrete barriers to cover their new base camp’s flank. Standing in open field, under threat of snipers, he calmly directed the loading and transfer of the first barrier with heavy equipment. As his crew moved into the distance, toward base camp, he found himself standing alone next to a pile of barriers. He said he wasn’t afraid. He knew with his training and physical resources he could handle what might come at him. But, he still found himself diving and freezing behind a barrier until his crew returned.

      In theory, his panic mechanism motivated the anxiety of separation. It increased to a point where his SCC coped with it by directing the activation of muscles to seek shelter, then freeze behind a remaining barrier. Once the crew and heavy equipment returned he was suddenly out from cover and calmly directing the next load. He felt safe and calm again.

      When the last barrier began to move off with his crew, he surprisingly found himself running and zigzagging to keep up and behind the last barrier as it dangled from the equipment. He described this as odd because his training and beliefs were telling him he wasn’t afraid and that he should stand and be alert to threat. His SCC was overriding his training and the result was disconcerting.

      If the natural instincts directing his actions were to have been medically altered, could the outcome have changed? Would he have scurried behind the barriers when alone or stood in the open waiting? Would he have run behind the last barrier or walked along side? Did he experience himself as scared and weak or as a warrior?

      More importantly, would the difference between his experience and mental expectations have created Operational Risk?

      An article in Semper Fidelis: A Psychological Study of Heroic Bravery, describes research conducted by Terence W. Barrett, PhD, Department of Psychology, North Dakota State University. Dr. Barrett found that 292 U.S. Marines who acted heroically brave and earned the nation’s Medal of Honor shared forty-one behavioral tendencies or characteristics.

      Each of these characteristics of bravery appears to be motivated by the instinct to seek. Seek challenge, adventure, risk, social unity, approval and more. It is possible that the instinctual mechanism to seek was genetically dominant for these Marines. There may have been a predisposition to shut down fear and seek. Had they understood this, those that subsequently died in combat may have survived longer by augmenting their heroic impulse.

      The capacity to distinguish honorable acts from those that may lead to unnecessary death or be felt as shameful and lead to serious psychological damage is important. Understanding the neuro-mechanisms motivating these seemingly automatic actions may be vital to a Marine’s capacity to optimize self-regulation and change results – of actions and stress.

      The officer in the example found considerable relief as he came to understand how these instinctual processes work. It allowed him to resolve and integrate an experience where previously he had been bothered by irrational and conflicting thoughts. Had his tendency to seek overridden his other impulses would he have stood in the open and unknowingly risk unnecessary death?

      By understanding and experiencing these neuro-mechanisms in action, in the garden, the Marine learned techniques of how to participate in his own neurological processes, to make sense of both honorable and potentially shameful action, and minimize the potential for any resulting mental chaos. This training could be paramount to the mitigation of the long-term effects from stress, which can fester into PTSD.

      Other Marines have successfully embodied the art of self-attunement and emotional regulation through participation in an educational training process in Operation Recovery’s garden. It is expected that this training will enhance their capacity to maintain situational awareness under extreme conditions and ensure the Marine makes appropriate decisions with awareness rather than instinctual inclination or habit.

 

Two men are in a bar getting drunk. Suddenly one of them throws up all over himself.
He says “Oh, no. Now my wife will kill me”.

His friend says “Don’t worry. Just tuck a twenty dollar bill in your breast pocket and tell your wife that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning bill”.

So they stay for another couple of hours and get even drunker.

Eventually he reels home and his wife starts to give him a bad time.

“You reek of alcohol and you’ve thrown up all over yourself, my God you’re disgusting” etc.

Speaking very carefully so as not to slur, he says, “Wait. It’s not what you think. I only had one drink, but this man was sick on me. He’d obviously had one too many, or else he just couldn’t hold his liquor. He was very sorry and he gave me twenty dollars for the cleaning bill. Look in my breast pocket.”

She looks in his breast pocket and says, “But this is forty dollars”.

“Ah, yes.” says the man. “He pee’d on my trousers too”.
Everyonce in a while someone will ask me if they can copy the joke, hell please do whatever you people want to do with them, these are jokes that I have collected over the many years and written down, or were told to me, go ahead please.

My wife has had horrible cold sympstoms for about 6 days now. I thought the average cold lasted about 2-4 days?

She is stuffy, sneezing, dry cough, sinus pressure headches. mucos is still fairly clear though so I don’t think there is an infection.

What things work best for getting over a cold.

I know drink fuids, get rest, etc, but what else works?

My question is regarding if I should butt-in or not. My B.I.L. is married with 3 children. His wife works while he stays at home with the kids. The problem is, he is a crack addict. He didn’t start this until he was expecting baby #1…really strange if you ask me but, anyway. My husband (his younger brother), my MIL, FIL and myself busted him pawning stuff that he steals out of their home (including their wedding bands!!!) He has fallen asleep many, many times while the kids were both infants (they are 11 months apart) and the neighbor had to break-in to wake him up. He said they were crying for over 3 hours! His wife is aware of his addiction but, she won’t tell him to stop because last time she told him that, he left her while she was 6 months prego. My MIL refuses to acknowledge that he even has a problem. Recently, my SIL was telling me that they go to my in-laws and “shop”. They go over there and take what they want out of their house! My hubby won’t speak to them at all.

My boyfriend’s wife of 16 years died a year ago from diabetes and alcoholism. He is still dealing with his grief issues which is okay by me.
Should I be concerned about his being the husband of an alcoholic?
He took care of his sick, alcoholic wife for at least four years. Is he an enabler? Was he codependent? How do I find out if he was or is resentful?

After having multiple negative pregnancy tests, and then missing her period, (now 3.5 weeks late) latest test shows my wife’s pregnant. We identified a few nights (3-5) with multiple drinks 1/2 bottle of wine, etc etc (birthdays, anniv,) as well as going into the jacuzzi 4X. We were careful to test for pregnancy before the outing and thought it was ok.

Could this have an effect on the baby/pregnancy? Hopefully not…

We got really drunk and then I talked her into smoking weed with me.
Then we went out for some beers and she passed out on the way back.
I got bored babysitting her so I bent her over the table and did anal because she hates it.
Should I say anything if she maybe got hurt and asks? Maybe I should keep it to myself and delete the video I made. What should I do ?

My wife went out last night and came home late and a little drunk.She was quiet when she came in kissed me and went to sleep.I was doing laundry today and her panties that she wore last night had a lot of dry white substance in them,I asked her about it and she said she didn’t know what it was and quicky cahnged the subject.I am concerned that she cheated on me , but she won’t talk about it.What do you think,should I be concerned?

I did not know this until a few minutes ago.

http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0geu.NMpLxH9yMBoT1XNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTE4a3I0cDE3BHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDMQRjb2xvA2FjMgR2dGlkA0RGUjVfNzcEbANXUzE-/SIG=13frkfru2/EXP=1203631564/**http%3a//www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/us_elections/article3295472.ece

I did not know this until a few minutes ago.

http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0geu.NMpLxH9yMBoT1XNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTE4a3I0cDE3BHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDMQRjb2xvA2FjMgR2dGlkA0RGUjVfNzcEbANXUzE-/SIG=13frkfru2/EXP=1203631564/**http%3a//www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/us_elections/article3295472.ece

Laura C. Trueman has spent much of her career promoting affordable health care.  Now, she wishes she could find some herself.

Laid off from her marketing job at a managed-care company late last year, Trueman was able to keep her health insurance thanks to a provision in the federal stimulus bill that gave furloughed workers the right to purchase their old employer-based coverage at a 65% discount.  The subsidies, which last up to nine months, were designed to give workers like Trueman time to get back on their feet.

Today, with the job market weak, Trueman is still without a job, and her family is bracing for an uncertain future. With the subsidies, she and her husband, a self-employed attorney were paying a manageable $460 a month for their health insurance; starting Dec. 1, the cost jumps to $1,313.   They can ill afford the increase.  They’re already having trouble making their mortgage payment, and fear they might lose their Northern Virginia home.

“It has really made a huge difference for us,” she says of the insurance assistance, adding that the higher payment “would be a real stretch.”

Since 1985, a law known as COBRA has given laid off-workers the right to hold onto their employer-based health insurance for up to 18 months so long as they continue to pay the premiums, including payments that their employers used to make on their behalf. In the past very few people could afford this option, but the government subsidies have changed that, and now enrollments appear to be growing sharply. Hewitt Associates, a Lincolnshire, Ill., consulting firm, recently estimated that the rate at which workers were opting for coverage under COBRA had doubled compared with pre-subsidy levels.

Although federal officials do not have figures on the number of people participating in the program, millions have been eligible. The law covers anyone laid off between Sept. 1 of last year and Dec. 31 of this year.

But with the first discounts having gone into effect March 1, many people are about to see the benefit expire, including many who remain unemployed. The Obama administration and some members of Congress are talking about  whether to extend the subsidy.  Some lawmakers aren’t enthused because of budget concerns, but backers say the subsidy is a crucial lifeline for people still hunting for jobs.

Just this week, Rep. Joe Sestak, D-Penn., introduced legislation that would extend from 9 to 15 months the total allowable time an unemployed worker and her family could receive the subsidized COBRA assistance. The legislation would also extend the subsidies to people laid off through June 30, 2010, widening the window of eligibility by six months. A third provision would give an extra six months of undiscounted COBRA coverage to people who were laid off early in 2008 before the subsidy law took effect.

“Federal subsidies for COBRA premiums are making insurance more affordable for millions of unemployed individuals and their families,” says Rep. Nita Lowey, a New York Democrat. “This is not the time for those who have lost their jobs to have to worry about an impending drastic increase in their health insurance costs. Congress should extend these subsidies so the number of uninsured does not grow even further.”

For now, the aid is helping a broad cross section of people with widely varying health and financial situations — from newly minted MBAs to older workers forced out of their jobs after exhausting their disability leave, among other reasons.

A Twitter account that tracks news and personal experiences with the subsidy has garnered scores of followers.

Out-of-work professionals are blogging about the issue for the Wall Street Journal.

“I can only be grateful that I am safeguarded by COBRA,” writes a furloughed operations manager at Bank of America, “and hope that I am employed and eligible for medical insurance through my new employer before my COBRA term ends.”

Close to home

My own family got seven months of discounted coverage out of the program after I lost my job as a newspaper reporter last year. The savings: a cool $6,000.  While I am still looking for permanent work, my wife was recently able to find a job with benefits.  (The discounts end when you become eligible for other insurance, either directly or through your spouse.) People in the same boat seem to be everywhere. The firm my former company hired to administer the discount program was so flooded with work that it ended up hiring temporary workers – including one that I spoke with who had herself been recently laid off and was looking to take advantage of the subsidy.

But in many cases, the subsidies are, at best, only temporarily easing the stresses facing employees who have been laid off.

A joint study by the American Cancer Society and the Kaiser Family Foundation found that many chronically ill people could not even afford the subsidized premiums. (KHN is a program of the foundation.) Once the full COBRA premiums are reinstated, the study found, many cancer patients face becoming uninsured or forgoing needed treatments.

Indeed, people who become eligible for COBRA are generally older and sicker than the rest of the work force, and have fewer insurance options when they lose their jobs.

You can try to purchase insurance on your own, although that is generally more expensive than an employer-sponsored plan and often comes with limits on basic coverage such as maternity care or prescription drugs.   Some – but not all — states provide a backstop in the form of “high-risk pools” that offer insurance to people who can’t get coverage elsewhere because of their medical history.

Dale Gardner, who lost his job at a high-technology firm in Virginia last November, says the subsidies have been welcome.

At the same time, he says that he has been able to replace much of his lost income as a consultant, and that he would not mind paying full freight so long as he can keep his coverage under COBRA.  What worries him the most, he says, is that he won’t be able to find a job with benefits before his right to coverage under an even un-subsidized COBRA expires in 2010.

“Because of our health history,” he says, “coverage for my wife and I is going to be difficult to find at any price.” He says his wife has arthritis and one of his sons has asthma.

“I count myself as fortunate,” he adds. “I have been able to maintain coverage despite the fact that my family has health problems. (But) there are a lot of people who cannot even get that who have worse health problems.”

Some experts say those problems point up the need for broader-based reform of the health-care system.  The subsidies have been “a valuable first step” helping people in need keep their insurance, says Karyn Schwartz, a health-policy analyst at the Kaiser Family Foundation.  “Providing security for all of those who need health insurance will require more comprehensive reform,” Schwartz adds.

Trueman, 51, was laid off in December 2008, after working a year at a unit of UnitedHealth Group that provides managed care for Medicaid enrollees in 20 states.  Before that, she was the executive director of the Coalition for Affordable Health Coverage, a Washington-based industry advocacy group.

With her background in health policy, she figured getting a new job would be “relatively quick and painless.” But that has not been the case. “I have had a lot of interviews,” she says, “but just clinching the right one has not happened.”

Down the road, she worries most about a son in college who has a chronic health condition that requires medication. That could make it hard for the whole family to find insurance in the private market. Another problem is that her home state of Virginia is one that does not have a public program for “high-risk” individuals.

Seeking to exhaust all options, she has lately been reading up on how some drug companies give discounts to the poor or uninsured, to see if her son might qualify.

Come December, when the COBRA discounts expire, “I don’t really know what we will do,” Trueman says. “I hope we have a job by then that has health insurance.”

My wife became addicted to precocet. She reduced her dosage slowly down to half a pill. She has decided to quit the medicine altogether, but is having severe chills and heat flashes. Does anyone know how long these will continue?
My wife was prescribed percocet after an operation and after 3 weeks stopped taking it since no longer needed for pain. We found out she became addicted and she started taking it again but in reduced amounts and 3 days ago started taking half a pill. 18 hours ago she decided to no longer take any more medicine. She is currently having severe cold chills. Does anyone know how long these symptoms may last since she wasn’t addicted very long? When she told her doctor, all he said was to continue taking reduced dosages until she was off them.

my wife’s pregnant but shes lactose intolerant is there another type of milk she can drink?

The most important message is to recognize the yeast infection early and try an available natural remedy that you can use in the comfort of the home that is safe and no prescription required. Natural antibiotics are always a choice that should be taken over a prescription if possible. Colloidal silver has been a patented drug and then relabeled a natural supplement. Oregano oil is also a natural antibiotic.

Yeast infection is like a ghost waiting to scare young and older women when their body becomes out of balance due to stress, dubious partners, hormonal changes and/or immune system weakness. A few women will elude this voracious monster but unfortunately most will be frightened at least twice in their life and others will live with a chronic reoccurrence of yeast infection.

The body will always respond quicker to a natural solution and return to a healthy state if it doesn’t have a compound job to do. The dual duty of the immune system would be trying to rid the body of an invasive disease while expelling man made toxins in prescription drugs that usually cause unbalanced ph in the blood and immune system. In addition to natural antibiotics there are two other home remedies that have been used to control yeast infection, yogurt insertion and tea tree oil. It is a very wrong practice of wearing a wet towel for long time. Dry your body properly, and wear clean and dry clothes. Also avoid too much of cosmetics and fragranced ointments, cream, etc., especially, near the genitals or other sensitive areas. Patient suffering from yeast infection should not use deodorants or strong perfumes, as this will worsen the infection and will become much painful. Wear comfortable clothes, avoid acrylic undergarments. Cotton clothes and cotton undergarments are the best choice. Another important thing apart from wearing cotton clothes is wear properly washed, dry clothes.

Yeast infections are also known as Candida, Candidiasis is an infection caused by a group of microscopic fungi or yeast and there are more than 20 species of Candida. You can develop yeast infections around dentures, under the breast, vagina and lower abdomen, nail beds, and beneath skin folds. Yeast infections tend to become more common with increased age, but can occur at any age and are known to cause vagina odors and while yeast infections are thought to be mainly a problem among women, did you know that men can also get them? This is especially true for a man whose wife is suffering from one, since having sex will pass the infection back and forth.

It was assumed in early days that women only are infected from yeast infection. This, however, is not true studies have shown that yeast infection can attack both men as well as women. The main reasons behind this infectious disease are irregular menstrual cycle, weak immune system, stressful life style, etc. Yeast Infection can also be due to other diseases like diabetes. Excess intake of medicine, antibiotics, and birth controlling pills are other yeast infection causes.

Balanced diet helps in keeping you healthy and disease free. A healthy diet is one which has everything from cereals to whole grain wheat, to green leafy vegetables and fruits. Person suffering from yeast infection should take nutritious food, lots of water, curd, etc. Patient should strictly avoid oily and fatty foods, sugar, sweets, and chocolates, etc. All these foods are really unhealthy as it nourishes the microorganism and hence hampers in the treatment. Patient suffering from yeast infection should not use deodorants or strong perfumes, as this will worsen the infection and will become much painful. Wear comfortable clothes, avoid acrylic undergarments. Cotton clothes and cotton undergarments are the best choice. Another important thing apart from wearing cotton clothes is wear properly washed, dry clothes. It is a very wrong practice of wearing a wet towel for long time. Dry your body properly, and wear clean and dry clothes. Also avoid too much of cosmetics and fragranced ointments, cream, etc., especially, near the genitals or other sensitive areas.

INTRODUCTION

“Gender”, in common usage, refers to the differences between men and women. Encyclopaedia Britannica notes that gender identity is “an individual’s self-conception as being male or female, as distinguished from actual biological sex.” Although “gender” is commonly used interchangeably with “sex,” within the academic fields of cultural studies, gender studies and the social sciences in general, the term “gender” often refers to purely social rather than biological differences. Some view gender as a social construction rather than a biological phenomenon.

According to wikipedia.com; The word gender comes from the Middle English gendre, a loanword from Norman-conquest-era Middle French. This, in turn, came from Latin genus. Both words mean ‘kind’, ‘type’, or ‘sort’. They derive ultimately from a widely attested Proto-Indo-European (PIE) root gen-, which is also the source of kin, kind, king and many other English words.[4] It appears in Modern French in the word genre (type, kind) and is related to the Greek root gen- (to produce), appearing in gene, genesis and oxygen. As a verb, it means breed in the King James Bible: 1616: Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind. — Leviticus 19:19

The gender awareness among Nigerian of different ethnic group varies, and this can be viewed from the aspect of the major constraints women face in public/private and traditional positions: their overall work load and the moral pressures and negative attitudes of both men and women towards women in leadership. As a result, many women were not empowered to fit into for leadership positions. The study is therefore ment to show that for women to be able to participate meaningfully in democratic processes, including local politics, more support would be required for candidates for political positions at household as well as community levels. At the household level, women would need support and assistance with domestic chores in order to release time to participate in local politics and leadership. At community level, Local Councillors be they men or women, would need to better understand the existence of gender biases against women’s participation in local participation processes and their role and responsibilities to counter such biases.

On the other hand the Nigeria, The most populous country in Africa, Nigeria accounts for over half of West Africa’s population. Although less than 25% of Nigerians are urban dwellers, at least 24 cities have populations of more than 100,000. The variety of customs, languages, and traditions among Nigeria’s 250 ethnic groups gives the country a rich diversity. The dominant ethnic group in the northern two-thirds of the country is the Hausa-Fulani, most of whom are Muslim. Other major ethnic groups of the north are the Nupe, Tiv, and Kanuri. The Yoruba people are predominant in the southwest.

About half of the Yorubas are Christian and half Muslim. The predominantly Catholic Igbo are the largest ethnic group in the southeast, with the Efik, Ibibio, and Ijaw (the country’s fourth-largest ethnic group) comprising a substantial segment of the population in that area. Persons of different language backgrounds most commonly communicate in English, although knowledge of two or more Nigerian languages is widespread. Hausa, Yoruba, Igbo, Fulani, and Ijaw are the most widely used Nigerian languages.

The Nok people in central Nigeria produced terracotta sculptures that have been discovered by archaeologists.[4] In the northern part of the country, Kano and Katsina has recorded history which dates back to around AD 999. Hausa kingdoms and the Kanem-Bornu Empire prospered as trade posts between North and West Africa. The Yoruba kingdoms of Ifẹ and Oyo in the western block of the country were founded about 700-900 and 1400 respectively. Yoruba mythology believes that Ile-Ife is the source of the human race and that it predates any other civilization. Ifẹ produced the terra cotta and bronze heads, the Ọyọ extended as far as modern Togo. Another prominent kingdom in south western Nigeria was the Kingdom of Benin whose power lasted between the 15th and 19th century. Their dominance reached as far as the well known city of Lagos which is also called “Eko” by the indigenes Now the role of gender will be different according to the ethnic groups in nigeria but before we dwell into that what is the term “gender role” A gender role is a set of perceived behavioral norms associated particularly with males or females, in a given social group or system. It can be a form of division of labour by gender. It is a focus of analysis in the social sciences and humanities. Gender is one component of the gender/sex system, which refers to “The set of arrangements by which a society transforms biological sexuality into products of human activity, and in which these transformed needs are satisfied” (Reiter 1975: 159). All societies, to a certain effect, have a gender/sex system, although the components and workings of this system vary widely from society to society. Most Authors recognize that the concrete behavior of individuals is a consequence of both socially enforced rules and values, and individual disposition, whether genetic, unconscious, or conscious. Some researchers emphasize the objective social system and others emphasize subjective orientations and dispositions. Creativity may cause the rules and values to change over time. Cultures and societies are dynamic and ever changing, but there has been extensive debate as to how, and how fast, they may change. Such debates are especially intense when they involve the gender/sex system, as people have widely differing views about how much gender depends on biological sex.

AIM AND OBJECTIVES

The aim of this research is to analyze women’s socio-economic roles, their changing contexts and opportunities, as it is in among various ethnic group in Nigeria over space and time, to achieve this the objectives are:

Analyze the roles of men and women at household and community levels

Identify common constraints to women’s participation in leadership positions

Identify ways through which communities can encourage and support women to participate in leadership at local levels

To analyze gender issues and the socio-economic role of women in the traditional and modern sectors,

To provide countrywide data on opportunities and constraints on women including status of women in education, health, politics, natural resources and civil society, and

To suggest policy measures to improve education and opportunities to enable women at all levels to participate in the new economic order effectively.

STUDY AREA

The study area is Nigeria, which has over three hundred and fifty(350) ethnic groups in 36 states, but the reseach will focus on the three major once with interest in other group such as Ijaw, Edo and Isoko ethnic groups they are introduce briefly below;

The Yoruba (Yorùbá in Yoruba orthography) are a large ethno-linguistic group or ethnic nation in Africa; the majority of them speak the Yoruba language (èdèe Yorùbá; èdè = language). The Yoruba constitute approximately 21 percent of Nigeria’s total population,[1] and around 30 million individuals throughout the region of West Africa.[2] They share borders with the Borgu (variously called Bariba and Borgawa) in the northwest, the Nupe and Ebira in the north, the Ẹsan and Edo to the southeast, the Igala and other related groups to the northeast, and the Egun, Fon, and other Gbe-speaking peoples in the southwest. While the majority of the Yoruba live in southwestern Nigeria, there are also substantial indigenous Yoruba communities in Benin, Ghana and Togo, as well as large diasporic Yoruba communities in Sierra Leone, Brazil, Cuba, Puerto Rico and Trinidad, the Caribbean, and the United States.The Yoruba are the main ethnic group in the states of Ekiti, Lagos, Ogun, Ondo, Osun, and Oyo, which are subdivisions of Nigeria; they also constitute a sizable proportion of Kwara and Kogi states as well as of the Benin.Many people of African descent in the Americas have claim to Yoruba ancestry (along with several other ethnic groups) to some degree. A significant percentage of Africans enslaved during the Trans Atlantic Slave Trade in the Americas were Yoruba.

The Igbo, sometimes (especially formerly) referred to as the Ibo, are a West African ethnic group numbering in the tens of millions. Most Igbos live in southeastern Nigeria, constituting about 17% of the population of the country; they can also be found in significant numbers in neighboring Cameroon and other African countries. Their language is the Igbo language.The traditional Igbo religion believes in a benevolent creator, usually known as Chukwu, who created the visible universe, the uwa. Opposing this force for good is agbara, meaning spirit or supernatural being.Apart from the natural level of the universe, they also believe that it exists on another level, that of the spiritual forces, the alusi. The alusi are minor deities, and are forces for blessing or destruction, depending on circumstances. They punish social offences and those who unwittingly infringe their privileges. The role of diviners is to interpret the wishes of the alusi, and the role of the priest is to placate them with sacrifices. Either a priest is chosen through hereditary lineage or he is chosen by a particular god for his service, usually after passing through a number of mystical experiences. Each person also has a personalised providence, which comes from Chukwu, and returns to him at the time of death, a chi. This chi may be good or bad.

The Hausa are a Sahelian people chiefly located in the West African regions of northern Nigeria and southeastern Niger. There are also significant numbers found in regions of Sudan, Cameroon, Ghana, Cote d’Ivoire, and Chad and smaller communities scattered throughout West Africa and on the traditional Hajj route across the Sahara Desert and Sahel. Many Hausa have moved to large coastal cities in West Africa such as Lagos, Accra and Cotonou, as well as to countries such as Libya, in search of jobs that pay cash wages. However, most Hausa remain in small villages, where they grow crops (Hausa farmers time their activities according to seasonal changes in rainfall and temperature) and raise livestock, including cattle. They speak the Hausa language, a member of the Chadic language group, itself a sub-group of the larger Afro-Asiatic language family.

The Ijaw (also known by the subgroups “Ijo” or “Izon”) are a collection of peoples indigenous mostly to the forest regions of the Bayelsa, Delta and Rivers States within the Niger Delta in Nigeria. Some are natives of Akwa Ibom, Edo and Ondo states also in Nigeria. Many are found as migrant fishermen in camps as far west as Sierra Leone and as far east as Gabon along the West African coastline. They are believed to be some of the earliest inhabitants of southern Nigeria. The Ijo people number about 9 million. They have long lived in locations near many sea trade routes, and they were well connected to other areas by trade as early as the 15th century

Isoko While some people believed that the Isoko people originated from the Benin Kingdom, others, like Professor Obaro Ikime, believe this to be untrue. Ikime states “If there is any aspect of the history of the various peoples of Nigeria about which no one can speak with any exactitude, it is that which deals with the origins of our peoples.”The belief that most of the Isoko groups are of Benin origin were views held and expressed in the 1960s and 1970s. These views were “decidedly simplistic and were based on British Intelligence Reports of the 1930s”and Ikime’s field work of 1961-1963

Edo people Benin City is called Edo by its inhabitants and in certain contexts individuals from all parts of the kingdom will refer to themselves as ovbiedo (child of Edo ). Except when speaking English, no Edo person ever refers to himself as “Benin” or “Bini”. These are non-Edo words of doubtful origin used by Europeans as an adjective and for the dominant people of the Edo kingdom and their language. Perhaps, this can be linked to the pre-colonial practice of naming areas after major geographic landmarks, in this case the Bight of Benin. It is on record that in 1472, the Portuguese captain Ruy de Siqueira brought a sailing ship as far as the Bight of Benin under the reign of Oba Ewuare. Egharevba provides further confirmation that Europeans named areas after major geographic landmarks. According to him, the label Lagos (the popular capital City of Nigeria) can be traced to the Portuguese because of its proximity to the lagoon. It has been suggested that “Benin” or “Bini” derive from the Yoruba phrase Ile-ibinu (land of vexation) which was purportedly uttered by Prince Oronmiyan declaring the fundamental fact that “only an Edo prince can rule over Edo land.” This Yoruba-based etymology of “Benin” or “Bini” is doubtful since there is evidence indicating that these words already occur in Portuguese writings about Edo dating back to the fifteenth century. According to Crowder, “unfortunately little is known about the early history of Oyo, for there was no written language, unlike Benin which was first visited by Europeans at the end of the fifteenth century.” Not until the end of the seventeenth century are there any definite dates for the history of Oyo which is no doubt linked to the later contact with the Europeans. The different close neighbors refer to the Edos by different names. For example, the Urhobos call the Edos ikhuorAka (the people of Aka), the Ikas (Agbor) use the label ndi-Iduu (the people of Iduu). Along this line of reasoning, the Yoruba phrase Ile-ibinu, later corrupted to Ubinu, may be Yoruba’s label for the Edos in light of the constant warfare against the Oyo empire by different Edo kings. This explanation is particularly striking because the Yorubas (for example, the Ekitis) refer to the Edo as Ado and not Ubinu. However, according to Egharevba it was Oba Ewuare Ne ogidigan (The great), about 1440 A.D to 1473 A.D, who changed the name of the country to Edo after his deified (servant) friend. Prior to this, the land had been called the land of Igodomigodo. Thus, the City has been known afterwards as Edo ne ebvo ahirre (Edo the City of love) because through love Edo (the servant friend) was able to save Ewuare from a sudden death.

SCOPE OF STUDY

The study will be limited to the areas such as

Cultures and gender roles,

Gender equity,

Women in leadership position,

Women empowerment,

Gender equity,

Women empowerment: education,

Women and HIV/AIDs,

All of the issues listed above will be viewed in terms of the various ethnic groups in Nigeria and more over what obtains at present compared to the past. The data would be collated and a comparative analysis would be made.

ETHNICITY IN NIGERIA

To begin with, ethnicity1 may be defined as “the employment or mobilization of ethnic identity and difference to gain advantage in situations of competition, conflict or cooperation” (Osaghae 1995:11). This definition is preferred because it identifies two issues that are central to discussions on ethnicity. The first is that ethnicity is neither natural nor accidental, but is the product of a conscious effort by social actors. The second is that ethnicity is not only manifest in conflictive or competitive relations but also in the contexts of cooperation. A corollary to the second point is that ethnic conflict manifests itself in various forms, including voting, community service and violence. Thus, it need not always have negative consequences. Ethnicity also encompasses the behaviour of ethnic groups. Ethnic groups are groups with ascribed membership, usually but not always based on claims or myths of common history, ancestry, language, race, religion, culture and territory. While all these variables need not be present before a group is so defined, the important thing is that such a group is classified or categorised as having a common identity that distinguishes it from others. It is this classification by powerful agencies such as the state, religious institutions and the intelligentsia such as local ethnic historians that objectifies the ethnic group, often setting in motion processes of self-identification or affirmation and recognition by others. Thus, ethnicity is not so much a matter of ‘shared traits or cultural commonalities’, but the result of the interplay between external categorization and self-identification (Brubaker, Loveman and Stamatov 2004:31-32).

Most analysts agree on the basic constitutive elements of ethnic groups but disagree on how and why they were formed, why ethnicity occurs, why it occasionally results in violent conflicts and what should be done to prevent its perverse manifestations.. As Ake (2000) and Mustapha (2000) have correctly argued these distinctions have been overemphasized as use of one does not necessarily preclude the other. Most scholars combine more than one perspective in their analyses. Essentialism, the earliest of the four approaches, arose from cultural cartographies and greatly influenced modernization theorists whose positions became the points of departure of the other three approaches. The following sections examine the interplay between the ethnicity and gender issues

TALCOTT PARSONS’ VIEWS OF GENDER ROLES

Working in the United States, Talcott Parsons developed a model of the nuclear family in 1955. (At that place and time, the nuclear family was considered to be the prevalent family structure.) It compared a strictly traditional view of gender roles (from an industrial-age American perspective) to a more liberal view.

Parsons believed that the feminine role was an expressive one, whereas the masculine role, in his view, was instrumental. He believed that expressive activities of the woman fulfill ‘internal’ functions, for example to strengthen the ties between members of the family. The man, on the other hand, performed the ‘external’ functions of a family, such as providing monetary support.

The Parsons model was used to contrast and illustrate extreme positions on gender roles. Model A describes total separation of male and female roles, while Model B describes the complete dissolution of barriers between gender roles.(The examples are based on the context of the culture and infrastructure of the United States but I have simulated it to that of Nigeria)

Model A – Total role segregation

Model B – Total disintegration of roles

Education

Gender-specific education; high professional qualification is important only for the man

Co-educative schools, same content of classes for girls and boys, same qualification for men and women.

Profession

The workplace is not the primary area of women; career and professional advancement is deemed unimportant for women

For women, career is just as important as for men; Therefore equal professional opportunities for men and women are necessary.

Housework

Housekeeping and child care are the primary functions of the woman; participation of the man in these functions is only partially wanted.

All housework is done by both parties to the marriage in equal shares.

Decision making

In case of conflict, man has the last say, for example in choosing the place to live, choice of school for children, buying decisions

Neither partner dominates; solutions do not always follow the principle of finding a concerted decision; status quo is maintained if disagreement occurs.

Child care and education

Woman takes care of the largest part of these functions; she educates children and cares for them in every way

Man and woman share these functions equally.

Gender roles can influence all kinds of behavior, such as choice of clothing, choice of work and personal relationships; E.g., parental status and traditional belief in Nigeria.

GENDER ROLES AND SOCIALIZATION

The process through which the individual learns and accepts roles is called socialization. Socialization works by encouraging wanted and discouraging unwanted behavior. These sanctions by agencies of socialization such as the tradition, religion, family, schools, and the communication medium make it clear to the child what behavioral norms the child is expected to follow. The examples of the child’s parents, siblings and teachers are typically followed. Mostly, accepted behaviour is not produced by outright reforming coercion from an accepted social system. In some other cases, various forms of coercion have been used to acquire a desired response or function.

In majority of the traditional and developmental social systems, an individual has a choice to what should he or she extent as a conformed representative of a socialization process. In this voluntary process, the consequences can be beneficial or malfunctional, minor or severe for every case by a behavior’s socialization influence forming gender roles or expectations institutionalizing gender differences. Typical encouragements and expectations of gender role behavior are not as a powerful difference and reforming social trait to a century ago. Such developments and traditional refineries are still a socialization process to and within family values, peer pressures, at the employment centers and in every social system communication medium.

Still, once someone has accepted certain gender roles and gender differences as an expected socialized behavioral norms, these behavior traits become part of the individual’s responsibilities not influential roles in gender relationships on a personal and social levels to the individual’s own socializing role or self (identity). Sanctions to unwanted behavior and role conflict can be stressful.

CHANGING ROLES

“

Girls can wear jeans

And cut their hair short

Wear shirts and boots

‘Cause it’s okay to be a boy

But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading

‘Cause you think that being a girl is degrading

But secretly you’d love to know what it’s like

Wouldn’t you

What it feels like for a girl

”

Source: The Cement Garden which appears in the Madonna song, “What It Feels Like for a Girl”

A person’s gender role is composed of several elements and can be expressed through clothing, behaviour, choice of work, personal relationships and other factors. These elements are not concrete and have evolved through time (for example women’s trousers).

Gender roles were traditionally divided into strictly feminine and masculine gender roles, though these roles have diversified today into many different acceptable male or female gender roles. However, gender role norms for women and men can vary significantly from one country or culture to another, even within a country or culture. People express their gender role somewhat uniquely. Gender role can vary according to the social group to which a person belongs or the subculture with which he or she identifies cultural identity. Historically, for example, eunuchs had a different gender role because their biology was changed.

GENDER ROLES AND FEMINISM

Most feminists argue that traditional gender roles are oppressive for women. They believe that the female gender role was constructed as an opposite to an ideal male role, and helps to perpetuate patriarchy. For approximately the last 100 years women have been fighting for the same rights as men (especially in the 1960s with second-wave feminism and radical feminism) and were able to make changes to the traditionally accepted feminine gender role. However, most feminists today say there is still work to be done. Numerous studies and statistics show that even though the situation for women has improved during the last century, discrimination is still widespread: Women earn a smaller percentage of aggregate income than men, occupy lower-ranking job positions than men and do most of the housekeeping work[citation needed]. Some women, such as the editors of the Independent Women’s Forum, dispute this claim. They argue that women actually earn 98 cents on the dollar when factors such as age, education, and experience are taken into account. However, feminists believe these factors are not independent of gender. In fact, gender socialization informs the kind and length of education women receive, as well as the age at which women enter the workplace and the time spent working. Opponents counter that, regardless of what forces influence these factors, the evidence of wide-spread discrimination against working women is quite weak.

Furthermore, there has been a perception of Western culture, in recent times, that the female gender role is dichotomized into either being a “stay at home-mother” or a “career woman”[citation needed]. In reality, women usually face a double burden: The need to balance job and child care deprives women of spare time. Whereas the majority of men with university educations have a career as well as a family, only 50 percent of academic women have children. The double burden problem was introduced to scientific theory in 1956 by Myrdal and Klein in their work “Women’s two roles: Home and work,” published in London. When feminism became a conspicuous protest movement in the 60′s, critics often argued that women who wanted to follow a traditional role would be discriminated against in the future and forced to join the workforce. This has not proven true as such: although some women, especially single parents are denied this choice due to economic necessity, there is little or no discrimination against women who remain in traditional roles.[citation needed] At the beginning of the 21st century women who choose to live in the classical role of the “stay at home-mother” are acceptable to Western society. There is not complete tolerance of all female gender roles – there is some lasting prejudice and discrimination against those who choose to adhere to traditional female gender roles (Sometimes termed being femme or a “girly girl”) , despite feminism, in theory, not being about the choices made but the freedom to make that choice.[8] Women who choose to pursue careers and higher education are also similarly stigmatized by certain religious groups. Often accused of “trying to become a man” and “abandoning their children” if they pursue anything outside the role of mother, mistress, and maid

SITUATING GENDER ISSUES IN NIGERIAN CONTEXT

Methodology used

Interview and the use of questionnaire was employed about 350 questionnaire was administered to about five different ethnic group in Nigeria based in Lagos. Respondents included leaders from local ethnic group in Lagos, religious groups, women’s, youth and other people from different group. Special emphasis was put on the female respondents, A geographic approach was also used, with group concentration as emphasis of choice of location as most Ijaw, Isoko people reside in the riverine areas of Lagos notably, Ilaje-bariga, Okokomaiko, Orile and Ajegunle while the Igbo people reside in Alaba International, ladipo etc where they do their business and the Hausa people are located in Alaba-rago, mile-12, and Isolo-Mushin.

GENDER ROLES AT HOUSEHOLD AND COMMUNITY LEVEL

Gender roles are distinct in any society. In each ethnic group, there are definitions of what women and men of that society are expected to do in their adult life. Children are socialised to internalise these roles. Girls and boys are prepared for their different but specific roles. Most times when a man is seen doing women’s tasks, other members of society regard him as a coward, docile, or stupid. When a woman does what is presumed a man’s task, such a woman is regarded as too tough or being “more than a woman.”

Tasks women are unable to do, they engage paid labour for. Women are hunting and fishing to improve the nutrition standards of their families, yet traditionally in the Nigerian ethnic group society, these were exclusively men’s roles. Men and women gave different reasons why women work more than men did in the past especially among the Igbo ethnic group and some part of the south notably the isoko’s

Men’s perceptions

Women’s perceptions

We pay so much bride price that we expect our wives to work hard in order to pay back.

In a way, we buy the women. “Once you buy somebody, that person should work for you.” An Igbo respondent said

Some women enjoy hard work to please their husbands and in-laws and to show respect even if they are not yet married to you. A Yoruba man explains

Some women do not want to be helped with household work. They view household work as their domain and they do not want men to interfere.

Some women believe that they are married to work for their husbands and they view it as a failure on their part if their husbands want to help.

When we help our wives with household work, some of them gossip about it and this makes us unwilling to continue helping with such tasks, some Yoruba respondent explains

Men take women as slaves. An Hausa lady responds

Men are selfish. They do not want to work.

Men who have more than one wife find it hard to work for all the wives and leave the women to fend for themselves and their children. Hausa and Yoruba ladies explains

When further examining men and women’s tasks it was discovered that very few tasks were exclusively done by women or men. It was agreed that, apart from giving birth, men and women perform all other tasks. Roles specific to men were identified as: – digging graves, fathering a child, digging pit latrines, paying bride prices, marrying women and `disciplining’ women.

Disciplining women

Disciplining women as a role for men generated a lot of diverse view among different ethnic group but about 40% of the man agreed that it is the duty of a man to discipline his wife and this 40 percent is across board all ethnic group especially amongst the Yoruba and Hausa people. Men were pressed hard to explain what they meant by “disciplining.” The men argued that women need to be guided when they make mistakes. They punish them by beating. Apart from disciplining women, the issue of domestic violence and the treatment of women as minors was also raised by some female respondents. Reasons were explored why men batter their wives. The male respondents explained that women provoked men to beat them. One man said that: “Yoruba women have a sharp tongue and since men do not want to answer back, they beat them”.

SHARING OF DOMESTIC ROLES

A comparison was made between a home where there is co-operation and sharing of work between spouses and another where there is no such co-operation. It should be pointed out that in a household where there is no co-operation and sharing of work, there is: famine, poverty, quarrels and fighting, children not attending school, sickness, poor clothing, separation or divorce and stealing. Whereas a home with co-operation is characterised by: abundant food with many granaries in the compound, love, respect, wealth (e.g. more cows), children going to school, good health, good housing, and better clothing.

The respondents pointed out that a home with co-operation is more desirable. However, they recognised that the majority of households in the communities were characterised by some of the elements of lack of co-operation. They knew very few men who helped their wives with household chores and those notable for this act are the Isoko men they always help in domestics especially cooking infact they are known to be good cook. It was pointed out that such men are usually called names and sometimes they cannot mix freely with others for fear of being ridiculed by their colleagues.but other groups especially the Igbos and the Hausas are on the contrary

But men need to take up more responsibilities in the home. Some of the tasks that men could assist with in the home include: collecting water, taking care of themselves, collecting fire-wood, pounding Yam, caring for children, doing more farming – putting in more hours per day, weeding, harvesting, and cooking. In order to reduce the stigma of men helping their wives with domestic chores, women groups Men also complained that women are very quarrelsome. They said that some men want to discuss certain issues with their wives, but the women become hostile and do not want to discuss anything with them.the practice whereby women go to the farm and the men sit back at home among the Igbo Edo and Isoko has since been faced out and most of the men are now taking responsibility of such actions at home.

WOMEN AND LEADERSHIP IN COMMUNITIES

This topic is discussed in the context of leadership in a community. Qualities of a good and a bad leader will be identified and whether or not women have such qualities. But it should be noted that Nigeria as a country is the grasping in the euphoria of bad leadership and the solution to this problem as expressed by some quarter is the need for women to be in the helms of affairs but some have proposed otherwise. They were linked to the discussion on gender

Qualities of a good leader

A good leader should:

Be honest some of Nigeria’s leaders sometimes lie to us about information received from the state or from the central government in Abuja. A good leader should be accountable to the people by informing them about decisions taken during the meetings of the councils; this has been absent and explains the reasons why people like Salisu Buhari, Evans Ewerem and other leaders lied about there qualification, all are men.

Be well informed – because of high levels of illiteracy and lack of access to information, some of the leaders were taking advantage of this to misinform the communities for their personal benefit. A good leader should consult people about their needs and problems

Not use his/her privileged position for personal gains – some infact most of Nigerian leaders were using their privileged positions to harass women into sexual relationships and communities were unhappy about such leaders;

Be development oriented – some leaders did not encourage people to start income generating activities or mobilise them to undertake development programmes in their communities. It should be noted that a good leader is one who educates or sensitizes those he or she is leading so that they can improve their well being and that of their communities. A Leader should plan for their areas and advise the people on all aspects of development. He/she should stimulate people’s initiatives, cooperate with them and co-ordinate development activities.

It should be further pointed out that some leaders were sickly and not able to perform their duties. An issue was raised that some leaders may have diseases like AIDS which makes them too weak to work and yet they do not relinquish their leadership roles. This was raised in a few places but seemed to be a sensitive issue – whether people who are already suffering from AIDS should be elected to leadership positions or not.

Then we should examine whether or not women have the desired leadership qualities. In most cases women possess most of the good leadership qualities. However it should also be noted that a certain number of constraints to women’s participation in leadership:

Constraints to women’s participation in leadership

men do not allow their wives to attend meetings, even when they themselves already hold such positions, as they fear that women are being lured into relationships with other male leaders;

women’s workload causes poor time-keeping and prohibits their effective participation;

lack of respect for women as leaders by both women and men;

lack of transport (meetings are usually far and most women do not own cars);

low educational levels among women;

culturally determined factors: women are shy, lack confidence, have a low self-esteem;

separation or divorce – when this happens a woman has to go away. This creates a problem if she is a leader;

marriage (girls cannot hold positions of leadership in a community because they sooner or later get married and go to another community, so they are not elected to leadership positions).

women are normally not considered eligible for leadership.

FEMALE CIRCUMCISION IN NIGERIA

Female genital cutting (FGC), also known as female circumcision in Nigeria, is a common practice in many societies in the northern half of sub-Saharan Africa. Nearly universal in a few countries, it is practiced by various groups in at least 25 African countries, in Yemen, and in immigrant African populations in Europe and North America. In a few societies, the procedure is routinely carried out when a girl is a few weeks or a few months old (e.g. Eritrea, Yemen), while in most others, it occurs later in childhood or adolescence. In the case of the latter, FGC is typically part of a ritual initiation into womanhood that includes a period of seclusion and education about the rights and duties of a wife. The 2003 Nigeria Demographic and Health Survey (2003 NDHS) collected data on the practice of female circumcision in Nigeria from all women age 15-49. The 1999 NDHS collected data on female circumcision only from currently married women. In this chapter, topics discussed include knowledge, prevalence, and type; age at circumcision; person who performed the circumcision; and attitudes towards the practice.

KNOWLEDGE AND PREVALENCE OF FEMALE CIRCUMCISION

About half (53 percent) of Nigerian women age 15-49 have heard of the practice. There are marked variations in knowledge of female circumcision by residence, region, education, and ethnicity. About two-thirds of urban respondents have heard of female circumcision, compared with less than half of women in rural areas (69 versus 45 percent). In general, women in the south are more than twice as likely as women in the north to haven heard of the practice. These variations by region and residence are a reflection of ethnic differentials. The Igbo and Yoruba, who are primarily resident in the South East and South West, respectively, have greater knowledge of female circumcision than the ethnic groups primarily resident in the north.

Table 13.1 also shows the prevalence of female circumcision by background characteristics, which follows the same patterns as knowledge of circumcision. The proportion of women who were circumcised at the time of the survey was greatest in the southern regions, among the Yoruba and Igbo, and among urban residents. The high prevalence of female circumcision among the Yoruba (61 percent) and Igbo (45 percent) helps to explain regional and urban-rural differentials, since the Yoruba and Igbo traditionally reside in the South West and South East, which are more urban than the north. More than twice as many of the oldest women as the youngest women are circumcised (28 versus 13 percent), suggesting that there has been a decline in the practice. Caldwell et al. (2000) have reported a decline in the prevalence of female circumcision among the Yoruba.

AGE AT CIRCUMCISION

The percent distribution of women by age at circumcision is presented in Table 13.2. Female circumcision in Nigeria occurs mostly in infancy (i.e., before the first birthday). Three-quarters of the women who underwent circumcision were circumcised by age one. Twenty-one percent, however, were circumcised at age five or older. There are marked variations in the proportions of women circumcised in infancy by residence and ethnicity. For instance, almost nine in ten Igbo and Yoruba were circumcised during infancy compared with less than half of those in other ethnic groups (45 percent). Infibulation, the most severe form of circumcision, is more likely to be carried out on women circumcised at a later age than on the very young. The table shows that 37 percent of those cut before the age of one had been infibulated, while 49 percent of those circumcised after the age of four were infibulated. It should be noted that the total number of respondents infibulated was 57.

Nigeria is a male dominated society and women are seen as inferior to men. Women’s traditional role is to have children and be responsible for the home. Their low status and lack of access to education increases their vulnerability to HIV infection. Certain social and cultural practices also make them vulnerable to HIV.

HIV/AIDS AND NIGERIAN WOMEN: CAUSES

Marriage practices

Harmful marriage practices violate women’s human rights and contribute to increasing HIV rates in women and girls. In Nigeria there is no legal minimum age for marriage and early marriage is still the norm in some areas. Parents see it as a way of protecting young girls from the outside world and maintaining their chastity.

Many girls get married between the ages of 12 and 13 and there is usually a large age gap between husband and wife. Young married girls are at risk of contracting HIV from their husbands as it is acceptable for men to have sexual partners outside marriage and some men have more than one wife (polygamy). Because of their age, lack of education and low status, young married girls are not able to negotiate condom use to protect themselves against HIV and STIs.

Female circumcision

Female circumcision/female genital mutilation (FGM) is a cultural practice whereby all or part of the external female genitalia is removed by cutting. Around 60% of all Nigerian women experience FGM and it is most common in the south, where up to 85% of women undergo it at some point in their lives. FGM puts women and girls at risk of contracting HIV from unsterilized instruments, such as knives and broken glass that are used during the procedure.

Sex work

Although prostitution is illegal in Nigeria there are more than a million female sex workers. HIV infection rates among sex workers have been estimated to be as high as 30% in some areas. There are low levels of condom use among sex workers because of a lack of knowledge about HIV transmission and poor acceptance by male clients.10

Gender roles around the world pin women into positions where they lack the power to protect themselves from HIV infection and where, if they are infected, they lack opportunities to receive treatment. Negative assumptions about women’s roles and discrimination against them must be challenged and women must be empowered to help themselves and to protect themselves.

Women who have been raped need to have access to post-exposure prophylaxis – medical techniques which can reduce the chances of HIV infection if the victim of a rape is treated quickly. In many (mainly African) countries with high levels of sexual violence against women and high HIV prevalence, this treatment is not freely available to women.

Protecting women from HIV is not solely women’s responsibility. Most HIV+ women were infected by unprotected sex with an infected man. Preventing infection is the responsibility of both partners, and men must play an equal role in this. If no HIV+ men had unprotected heterosexual sex, the number of women newly infected with HIV would plummet. Even in the United States, there is still much more to be done to protect women. There has been criticism that sex education in schools in the USA is based on the idea that sexual fidelity until marriage is the best way to prevent STD infection. This won’t protect a women if she is infected by the man she marries, and it leaves her vulnerable and ignorant if she changes her mind, and has sex before marriage. This is why women must be taught about reducing risk by using condoms, and condoms must be easily obtainable for women.

Violence against women, discrimination, gender-based inequalities, prostitution – these are all social issues which undeniably need to be changed, but which might take decades to alter. Women who have HIV need to access to treatment, and women who don’t have the virus need to be able to protect themselves. If, in the short term, it is impossible to empower women to be able to insist on condom use, then efforts must be made to find an alternative solution.

There are plans underway to develop a microbicide – a gel or cream which can be applied vaginally, without a partner even knowing, and which would kill HIV, preventing infection. Tests have been being done for a number of years, but medical experts say that even if all goes well, such a gel is still at least 5 years away.

There are many issues surrounding the development of microbicides. Even if such a product can be shown to be both safe and functional, it will then have to be made palatable to consumers from different countries and cultures. One particular issue is pregnancy. Women in developing countries may want a microbicide that prevents HIV infection but which allows pregnancy to occur, whilst other women may want to be protected against both HIV infection and pregnancy. Given that a number of faith-based organisations espouse anti-contraception views, it seems likely that a microbicide which does not prevent pregnancy will be more easily accepted.

Many women may not think they are at risk for HIV infection. There is still, in some places, a myth that HIV infection is something that happens to other people – to men, to injecting drug users, to people from other ethnic groups. This falsehood needs to be cleared up, and countries around the world need to empower women to be able to protect themselves.

CONCLUSION

The Gender and ethnicity in Nigeria. This is a research paper undertaken to create awareness at the community level on the need to support and enable women to effectively utilise the opportunities provided by the Constitution and to examine the reaction or opinion of different response from ethnic group in Nigeria

The Gender and ethnicity in Nigeria paper provided the opportunity me to explore the relationship between women and men in discussing and examine the issue of women in leadership positions, HIV/AIDs, Female Circumcisions, households, and changing roles and amongs the various ethnic group in Nigeria. A strategic location was chose which is Lagos that houses all tribes and ethnic group (in large proportion) in Nigeria.

The respondents included leaders from ethnic group, religious groups, women’s groups, youth, and other small groups. Specific emphasis was put on women. During the course of the research work, respondents used their experience to evaluate and responded to each question about how far women had come in the struggle for equal participation in community and leadership, the challenges and constraints they face, and how this process can be supported.

The paper focused on household and community roles for both women and men. While there was agreement by both men and women on what women do, men’s roles were disputed by women and some men. They insisted that even when men undertake certain roles, they do as little as possible. The discussions revealed that women do all the reproductive work, undertake most of the productive work and take up a bigger share of community roles. Women are continuously taking up roles that were traditionally men’s tasks.

The experience of analyzing the integration of gender into ethnic groups in Nigeria and development planning has shown tentative success. The most important aspect of such follow-up should be sensitisation and building the capacity of elected policy makers and implementers to enable them to integrate gender in policy making, planning and implementation of programmes.

It must also be noted that Incorporating equal opportunities for women and men into all Community policies and activities that is “Gender mainstreaming involves not restricting efforts to promote equality to the implementation of specific measures to help women, but mobilising all general policies and measures specifically for the purpose of achieving equality by actively and openly taking into account at the planning stage their possible effects on the respective situation of men and women (gender perspective). This means systematically examining measures and policies and taking into account such possible effects when defining and implementing them.”

“Action to promote equality requires an ambitious approach which presupposes the recognition of male and female identities and the willingness to establish a balanced distribution of responsibilities between women and men.”

“The promotion of equality must not be confused with the simple objective of balancing the statistics: it is a question of promoting long-lasting changes in parental roles, family structures, institutional practices, the organistation of work and time, their personal development and independence, but also concerns men and the whole of society, in which it can encourage progress and be a token of democracy and pluralism.”

“The systematic consideration of the differences between the conditions, situations and needs of women and men in all Community policies and actions: this is the basic feature of the principle of ‘mainstreaming’, which the Commission has adopted. This does not mean simply making Community programmes or resources more accessible to women, but rather the simultaneous mobilisation of legal instruments, financial resources and the Community’s analytical and organisational capacities in order to introduce in all areas the desire to build balanced relationships between women and men. In this respect it is necessary and important to base the policy of equality between women and men on a sound statistical analysis of the situation of women and men in the various areas of life and the changes taking place in societies.”

RECOMMENDATIONS

Solutions to women’s constraints to leadership: The following solutions were proposed to these constraints:

Men should learn to trust their wives. Women should also behave well so that their husbands can trust them;

Men should take up household work. When women go for meetings for example, men should assist in collecting firewood, water, cooking and taking care of the children;

Change of attitude by men and women towards women’s leadership. Women need to learn to support each other more;

Sensitisation of men so that they can allow their wives to participate in leadership;

Family planning; having fewer children will create more time for women.;

Education of girls as future leaders;

Organising adult literacy classes for women;

Sensitisation regarding the negative cultural attitudes towards women.

1 Training and sensitization programmes

These leaders need to be able to analyse and articulate development plans for their communities. Both women and men Local Council members will benefit from training in government work, information gathering, consensus building with their electorate etc., which will enhance their capacity to better undertake the role they have been elected for.

This provides an opportunity to involve them in issues, which require a new way of thinking. At present day, politicians know that gender and women’s empowerment is an issue that they cannot ignore. A sensitisation and training programme for elected Local Council Members would be very useful..

Gender awareness training for technical officers

Whereas politicians are responsible for policy making, technical people are in charge of the implementation of these policies and they advise politicians on policy issues. The technical experts in different sectors such as health, education, agriculture and community development need to know how to integrate gender considerations into programme planning and implementation. Most of them have had training that was gender blind. Integration of gender concerns in technical fields is important for the implementation of policies. The technocrats who are mainly at district level, need to recognise that gender is a crosscutting issue and need to be trained on how to integrate gender issues in the development programmes.

Training for lower levels development workers

Gender issues need to be integrated at all levels of programme implementation. At community level, most development programmes are implemented through extension workers in different fields, like agriculture and health. These field workers could be trained to integrate gender in what they do. Furthermore there are the teachers at primary school level. Some of them could be selected for training in gender issues to enable them to make gender central to their work.

Training the field workers is important, as they have the opportunity of close interactions with grassroots people. Training field workers would ensure that gender is included in all their community work, which reaches the majority of the people. It is important that such training be joined to instructions on the use of participatory approaches, which -one- would build upon the interest, creativity and hopefulness raised during the gender and decentralisation programme, and -two- would provide room for “local” solutions, taking into account cultural and customary laws that hinder women’s full participation in politics and leadership.

Information-Education-Communication materials

It is important that all the whole sensitisation and training process be re-enforced by IEC materials in the local languages. Posters based on the issues raised during the programme should be produced to bring the results closer to the people and to enable them to better appreciate the situation.

Evaluation and monitoring

Monitoring and evaluation tools need to be designed based upon both the gender assessment study as well as the report of the Gender equity programme. These tools should focus on gender representation at all the local government levels, and at state and federal government, as well as impact of the various training programmes.

My wife was on her way too work when a Drunk Driver hit her head on. Total her car but thank God She was not Injury too bad. I no i will get stuck with paying off her car what the insurances. does not pay, But I see this as not fair, for something he did. Should I try too Sue, I don’t like doing things like that but may half too ; But two she is with out away of going now.

I like to drink whenever I can. My wife says that I probably have a drinking problem. It’s kind of depressing I must say. So in order to deal with this depression I have been trying to drink lots of booze. So far it is working alright. My wife is definitely a lot happier that’s for sure. But occasionally the alcohol wears off so I’m wondering exactly how much should I drink to get over this depression while still somewhat functioning?